Being of somewhat abbreviated stature myself, I know firsthand the constant giggles and short people jokes that come with it.
Sure, I can’t reach the top shelf (ha-ha), and yes, I probably could fit in a shoebox, but those are exactly the kind of jokes about being short we’ve learned to embrace.
Because honestly, being short is a blessing in disguise. We can stretch our legs on flights, wear cheaper kid-sized clothes, and fit into places the tall folks only dream of. And if you ever doubted the humor potential, our collection of the funniest short person jokes proves otherwise.
Of course, we’ve also rounded up a few clever roasts from the tall camp; tall people problems are real, too!
And if you’re just here for a laugh, check out our adult jokes, dirty jokes, or explore the wild world of Ask Reddit’s funniest moments.
So scroll down and enjoy the best jokes about short people we could find, because height might be small, but humor sure isn’t.
#61
Why was the short person stuck in the elevator? Because they could not reach the door open button.
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#62
Why could the short guy not finish the fun-sized candy bar? It was too big!
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#63
You know you are small when your kids can keep things out of your reach.
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#64
I tried to go into a short people nightclub last night. The bouncer stopped me on the door and said I couldn’t go in. I asked, “Why not?” He said, “Because you’re not on the shortlist.”
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#65
What do short people call an iPad?
A desktop computer.
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#66 Classic Or Cringe? You Decide
You know you’re short when you use an espresso cup as a regular coffee mug.
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#67
What do you call a short person with a bad spray tan?
An Oompa Loompa.
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#68
You know you’re short when people ask you which Minion character you played in the movie.
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#69
Do you know what always catches my eye? Short people with umbrellas.
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#70
You’re so short you could be drowned by heavy rains.
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#71
Never fight short people. They hit below the belt.
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#72
I didn't see you behind that grain of rice.
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#73
How does a short person look you in the eye?
They get on a ladder.
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#74
You know you are small when you can do pull-ups on a door handle.
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#75
When they sneeze, their heads hit the ground.
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#76 That’s One Way To Look At It
I met this really short baker called Peter the other day. He was telling me all about baking flatbreads. It was fascinating. I love the Pita patter of tiny Pete.
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#77
The key to writing short people jokes is keeping them short.
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#78
You shouldn’t make fun of short people.
They belittle themselves.
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#79
Why did the short person get fired from his job at the restaurant?
The authorities found out he was being paid under the table.
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#80
I know a joke about a short person, it is short and funny.
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