Do you want a girl who walks like a T-Rex? Maybe you're looking for somebody who chews so loudly that you'll feel like you're dating the Cookie Monster? Or perhaps you want a partner who applies mustard to fries by squeezing it into their hand and then smearing it all over their food? Well if you said yes to any of the above, then you're in luck because as you can see from this hilarious list of reasons that people deserved a breaking up for, all of these folks are currently leading a single life!
Compiled by Bored Panda, the stories below contain some of the funniest and most bizarre reasons that people have decided breaking up with somebody. It also includes some legendary breaking up quotes that you could definitely use as your own if need be. Let us know which one of the 'reasons why' is the best, and if you've had a funny or odd story ending a relationship then don't forget to add it to the list below! And if browsing through this list, you'll think that being single forever is the way to go, don't worry as there's always a weirdo just for you!
#721
We were friends before we started going out. He tried to commit suicide by pills after his last gf broke up with him (sign). We never hung out with my friends only mutual friends from his school. He caught me off guard one day & said he loved me, I said it back and didn't realize until after. Tried to break up with him 2 weeks later & he cried for 2 hours. Ended up breaking up with him online because I was interested in someone else. 2 weeks later he showed up at my school trying to get me back.
0points
#722
Together for YEARS... in that time , she gave me oral 2x .... then while I am the hospital she hooks up with high school crush , you guessed it , blowjob in the parking lot. Guess she WANTED to be a truck stop hooker.
0points
#723
After 6 months I broke it off because he didn't call me until 4 pm on New Years Day!
-1point
#724
-1point
#725
I dtarted going out with this girl from holand. She was extremely hot and she told me that she was on the pill, so when I couldnt find a condom I took the risk. She was the hottest girl i'd ever been with so i was very proud. But a couple of weeks later it started to hurt when I pissed. I got chlamydia from her so I stopped talking to her. In hindsight... i'd do it again.
-1point
#726
-1point
#727
She would call me cute names like sugar, honey and sweetheart, and end our conversations with affectionate phrases like Mucho Besitos (Spanish for many kiss, as she is Mexican). I later caught her using the EXACT same phrases when she was talking to her 10 year old son. It made me feel both less important and a little disturbed at the same time.
-1point
#728
He had hairy toes.
-1point
#729
He wanted to watch me paint.
Not my paintings, but actually sit and watch me paint something.
It wasn't just weird but seriously creepy.
Not my paintings, but actually sit and watch me paint something.
It wasn't just weird but seriously creepy.
-1point
#730
She liked pineapple on her pizza and only pineapple... 4 months in I couldn't take it anymore
-1point
#731
I remember dumping a girl because she didn't know algebra.. We were in middle school.
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-2points
#733
He peroxided his beautiful long brown locks. It fried his hair, made it yellow and he had to shave it all off. He looked really bad with no hair. I left his house after saying he looks good and never replied to his messages again.
-2points
#734
Broke up with him because his sunburnt skin started peeling all over his body. Couldn't touch him. I don't remember what excuse I gave him but i just had to get away from his flaky lizard skin!
-2points
#735
The Bitch ate my fries...
Nuff said.
-2points
#736
His top eyelashes pointed down.
-2points
#737
I dated a girl for a year first 6 months she was ok second 6 months she turned crazy. She was mixed race (not that that's a problem) she had large tiddys and her nipples looked like beef burgers. I am laughing now thinking about her "burger nips" fucked her off couse she was too crazy for me.
-2points
#738
I have two rules, don't eat on the bed and never touch my tim-tams.
So I come home from work and there she is studying away and and a plates on the bed, I could deal, but then there's the fork, also on the bed, I got angry and she was like but I'm studying and hungry and yea small argument for a minute or so, but I dealt with it. I go to leave the room and what do I spy on the floor, empty packet of tim-tams. I got furious and all came rushing back and we ended, after two years, over biscuits..
So I come home from work and there she is studying away and and a plates on the bed, I could deal, but then there's the fork, also on the bed, I got angry and she was like but I'm studying and hungry and yea small argument for a minute or so, but I dealt with it. I go to leave the room and what do I spy on the floor, empty packet of tim-tams. I got furious and all came rushing back and we ended, after two years, over biscuits..
-2points
#739
I lived with my parents at school so I didn't have my own place for sex.
I'm a big Yankees fan and a muslim. She was a red Sox fan and a jew.
I thought we'd have amazing sex, but the F*cking Johnny Damon (Red Sox) poster o the wall kept staring at me. I'd turn around and there was the whole f*cking red Sox team poster.
Couldn't take it. This was in 2005, 2004 was still fresh in my head.
I'm a big Yankees fan and a muslim. She was a red Sox fan and a jew.
I thought we'd have amazing sex, but the F*cking Johnny Damon (Red Sox) poster o the wall kept staring at me. I'd turn around and there was the whole f*cking red Sox team poster.
Couldn't take it. This was in 2005, 2004 was still fresh in my head.
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-3points
#740
She put her shirts on inside out. Shirt would be inside out and she'd stick her head through the top of the head hole and pull it on so it was inside in. IDK why it bothered me so much but it did.
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-3points