Do you want a girl who walks like a T-Rex? Maybe you're looking for somebody who chews so loudly that you'll feel like you're dating the Cookie Monster? Or perhaps you want a partner who applies mustard to fries by squeezing it into their hand and then smearing it all over their food? Well if you said yes to any of the above, then you're in luck because as you can see from this hilarious list of reasons that people deserved a breaking up for, all of these folks are currently leading a single life!
Compiled by Bored Panda, the stories below contain some of the funniest and most bizarre reasons that people have decided breaking up with somebody. It also includes some legendary breaking up quotes that you could definitely use as your own if need be. Let us know which one of the 'reasons why' is the best, and if you've had a funny or odd story ending a relationship then don't forget to add it to the list below! And if browsing through this list, you'll think that being single forever is the way to go, don't worry as there's always a weirdo just for you!
#501
She started every sentence of every text message with 'lol'.
3points
#502
I had been waiting for Dr. Strange to come out. Went on a first date with a guy, we kissed before the movie but when he tried to put his arm on my waist and pull me close in the middle of a goddamn super hero movie I had been waiting months for I was like "THE F*CK YOU DOING?!?'" I didn't just pay $15 for a movie to make out, I'm not a effin 12 year old. No second date.
3points
#503
In the middle of sex she would never riding me then abruptly stop and say things like "The light I'll due" I would proceed to be turned off then she'd say "No let's finish" and apologize. This happened whenever there was a bill due for 6 years.
3points
#504
I was dating a nice looking vioinist girl for a couple of days. Once she cut her hair kinda very short and my friend tells me "doesn't she looks just like Nacho?". And boy, she was so alike... That was it. I had to break with her.
3points
#505
Casually seeing this guy, typical hipster biker type. We were out to eat with a couple of other friends and decided to end the night at his place. He and one of the friends had biked there, myself and the other girl drove. We're standing outside chatting about how we're all getting to his place and he says "Biking's really more of a lifestyle for me, not just transportation." He was also wearing jorts. Nope.
3points
#506
Met this guy online for a stroll on the beach bc he couldn't afford to take me anywhere, not even coffee, I don't mind though, I love The beach. So we're walking and talking and he starts complaining about the government, the military(he was in the navy), teenagers and young twenty-somethings. I was over there like dude I work with teens, I love teens, and you know I'm 21 right? Needless to say I ghosted him with a quick escape SOS call from my bestie.
3points
#507
I once broke up with a guy because I hated the weird faces and noises he made while playing fighting games on his Nintendo 64. This was obviously in the 90s lol
3points
#508
He was studying for a master's in engineering but for the life of him, even after numerous demonstrations, he could not slice a chicken fillet.
3points
#509
This guy hounded me for almost 2 weeks to go out with him while always bragging about how great his VW was. He was a "car guy." I finally agreed outta irritation. I had already eaten dinner at home before he came to pick me up. It was drizzling outside. He picked me up in a mini van. And then when we sat at the bar and I watched the hockey game and had $7 worth of beer while he ordered food. He told the bartender 2 separate checks. Never answered his messages again about seeing each other again.
3points
#510
I dated a guy for 3 years. Once we went to my parents' house and I told him that I am going to take a shower and shave. He was like "No please , don't shave! I like to have sweet hair in my mouth!". I broke up with him and then kicked him out of the house.
3points
#511
He cheated on me. With a 45 year Old Man. P.S. he was14 I was 15.
3points
#512
I dated a guy back in 2011, we lasted about 9 months. He dumped me because of my crazy psycho mother, snotty sister & stupidly overbearing younger (by 3 years) brother. Packed up & moved to Oregon in April of 2012
Found out later that he was cheating on me, so I guess it was for the best.
Found out later that he was cheating on me, so I guess it was for the best.
3points
#513
I dated a guy who constantly picked his ears then smelt it. He blamed his "OCD."
He would also fart during church and when confronted he'd say, "I don't know. Maybe it slipped out? I don't have control over it!" He was 24 with no medical issues. I broke up with him after a year, I couldn't handle it.
He would also fart during church and when confronted he'd say, "I don't know. Maybe it slipped out? I don't have control over it!" He was 24 with no medical issues. I broke up with him after a year, I couldn't handle it.
3points
#514
I was broken up with in email because (and he specified this) my boobs are too big. He liked women with large hips and small breasts. I wouldn't have cared much if he hadn't had his hands all over them before coming to this conclusion.
3points
#515
I had been seeing a guy for a few weeks and he still hadn't kissed me. One night he called me and asked my permission to kiss me the next day...it was extremely awkward and I broke up with him the next day rather than kiss him. Don't ask me if I want to share our first kiss...just do it!!
3points
#516
I once dated a woman 10 years older than me who thought that following me into the bathroom when I needed to shit or kids was normal and cried like we were breaking up when I asked her to stop. Oddly enough that was not the reason we broke up
3points
#517
I put on Inglorious Bastards to have him complain, sit on the phone, and do anything BUT watch it. When I asked him if he wanted to watch something else, he goes "YES, Tarinteno is the absolute WORST. So boring!" Then proceeded to put on "Welcome to the Jungle" and preach about how it's the best cinematic masterpiece ever made. Uhhhhh BYE
3points
#518
I one dated this guy, I was 18 and he was 27, he got pissed of one day because he wanted to stare into my eyes for long periods of time and it was weird to me. He threatened to tell my mom we were having sex and proceeds to tell me he messaged her. I wanted proof and he said no. He was so weird and clingy. If I checked fb before messaging him he'd call me a bitch. Dodged a major bullet.
3points
#519
I once met this guy through a group of friends and kinda/sorta made conversation with him that day. We chatted a bit the following day and by day 3 he was at my house, and told me "you're my girlfriend now". This all happened so fast, that naturally I was nervous. After about 2 weeks of "dating", I start to like him and decide to tell him. He took it as me confessing my love for him and dumped me the next day. Then he took to social media to tell everyone how I was psycho.
3points
#520
We broke up legitimately because we had nothing in common, but I couldn't get over the fact that he had more torso than legs, and he had this ridiculously chubby baby face that was none the pleasing to look at. Plus, all our conversations were one sided because he never contributed anything.
3points