Do you want a girl who walks like a T-Rex? Maybe you're looking for somebody who chews so loudly that you'll feel like you're dating the Cookie Monster? Or perhaps you want a partner who applies mustard to fries by squeezing it into their hand and then smearing it all over their food? Well if you said yes to any of the above, then you're in luck because as you can see from this hilarious list of reasons that people deserved a breaking up for, all of these folks are currently leading a single life!
Compiled by Bored Panda, the stories below contain some of the funniest and most bizarre reasons that people have decided breaking up with somebody. It also includes some legendary breaking up quotes that you could definitely use as your own if need be. Let us know which one of the 'reasons why' is the best, and if you've had a funny or odd story ending a relationship then don't forget to add it to the list below! And if browsing through this list, you'll think that being single forever is the way to go, don't worry as there's always a weirdo just for you!
#401
I was dating a photographer when I was 19 years old. After our first date put seeing a movie and having sushi I took him home. Things got hot and heavy when he offered me a back rub. He took his Manhood out and as I grabbed it I felt a bum by his balls and I immediately thought it was genital warts. I quickly stopped and hopped off him before doing anything. He stayed the night but nothing happened. That morning he tried to wake me up for sex before he left so I played comatose. We broke up...
4points
#402
He got laser hair removal on his dick. It was our third date and he was telling me he didn't really enjoy sex because he had actual hair on his dick (he says it's cos of a botched circumcision but that sounds untrue) and someone agreed to laser it off for him against all reason and no surprise the hair came back but the sensation did not. The reason I actually never called him again tho was he's an All Live Matter person. You'd think a bisexual Jew would have more sympathy for th disenfranchised
4points
#403
He had 4 kids with his baby mama with a 5th on the way and would rather stay on welfare making only $900/month instead of getting a job 'to spend more time with his kids'
4points
#404
I once broke up with a guy because he never wore pants that were long enough for him!!
4points
#405
This was back in high school so music was really important. Every time I would play her a new song she would always sing along a totally different song that she already know. Always.
4points
#406
This is what happened, I accepted a friend request on Facebook not knowing who it was. Turns out that's her ex and she gave my name to him. I unfriended him and she rather got mad at me. So I walked away
4points
#407
When I was 18, my boyfriend broke up with me because he didn't want to feel"obligated".
At 55, I still don't knows what he was talking about.
At 55, I still don't knows what he was talking about.
4points
#408
He would only eat hotdogs and pizza. Which I could deal with, but the last straw was this: He ruined my senior prom because he got mad that I was looking at decorations and not him. He wouldn't dance and hid in a corner the whole time. My friend almost passed out on the dance floor and he just sat there and didn't help. I fell asleep at the table and then went home.
4points
#409
I broke up with my boyfriend because he said being on my period doesn't give me a right to be grouchy.
4points
#410
I had to end it with a guy because he would always apologize for sending me nudes. He'd send me one and if I didn't reply to it (even if I screenshotted it), he say, "Sorry if it was too much. Are we still okay?"
4points
#411
My high school boyfriend met up with my friend and I while we were at lunch at Subway. I went up to stand with him while he ordered and noticed that they had gotten a new kind of cookie so I added some to his order. Later he tells me he felt as though I had been using him for the cookies. Like yes, you caught me. I concocted this whole 8 month long relationship to get $1 worth of Subway cookies out of you. Mind you I was working close to 40 hour weeks and he didn't work just got an allowance.
4points
#412
I once dumped a guy because he said windles instead of windows, hurst instead of hearse. Oh and everything was phenomenal. I honestly think he knew ZERO other adjectives.
4points
#413
she was vegetarian
4points
#414
So, back when I was 10 I started dating one of my best friends because everybody else was getting together. It was kind of the thing at the time, I guess. Anyway, I've always hung out with the boys and so when me and my buddy started dating I had no clue what to do with him. For the past two years the extent of our relationship consisted of tag and wrestling. We lasted a full two, very awkward, days before we called each other up, admitted we had no idea what we were doing, and called it off.
4points
#415
We were at dinner on a first date and both got burgers, which came with their top buns on the side. He starts playing with his onions and commenting on their weird shape, then reaches over to MY burger, grabs an onion, and goes, "Whoa, it's like a spiral!" I was already mad that he'd touched my food, but then he got into my car with his still mustard-covered hands and started touching stuff. Never spoke to him again.
4points
#416
I broke up with a guy I had been with for 5 month because he got drunk and told me "I look too much like my mom and apparently during sex he thought about her sometimes." Haven't replied to any of his texts since then. Perv!
4points
#417
After 2 perfect years I found a secret sex email of him on Craigslist trying to hook up with other woman and tons of other men. I had no idea.i broke up with him then he told me he was a sex addict and i wasn't "sending him enough pics or sexting enough for him"
4points
#418
Second date with this guy & he brought his nine year old daughter along. She was a cross between a stepford kid & Adams family. Picture a stiff, emotionless kid (with long hair & headband) staring at me but super animated when talking with her dad.
Seriously she gave me the creeps.
Seriously she gave me the creeps.
4points
#419
I am a bit overweight and i went on a blind date and he said 'oh i have never had a fat girl' first, last and only....
4points
#420
First boyfriend ever, still a virgin and all he wanted me for (it seemed like) was to take my virginity... (Christian man that is...) worse part is... he always wanted anal. F'n disgusting and pathetic.
4points