From the moment you come into this world, there is this thing that happens around you that can sometimes be delightful but at times drives you crazy or leaves you completely baffled. You know, life. And if you find yourself in the middle of an experience that leaves you with more questions than answers, it’s absolutely okay to ask for advice.
Did you know that giving good advice is actually as much of an art (or science) as any other job? It’s not only about knowing things but also being able to find the right words of advice. But on the other hand, even after you have received the best piece of advice possible, it doesn’t automatically imply you are obliged to follow it.
It doesn’t matter how experienced the person giving advice is or how well they know you; if whatever they say you should do doesn’t sit right with you, you probably should follow your gut. And don’t even get me started on people who think they are authorized to share their life wisdom with you “just because,” even though the words “I need advice” have never left your lips.
Advice doesn’t always have to be serious or life-changing. Sometimes funny life advice about random situations is the best thing you need. There are a lot of unexpected things in life, and advice that not only makes you chuckle, but all of a sudden comes in handy is surely useful.
For this article, we have collected a bunch of funny quotes about life and pieces of advice for all sorts of situations. Which one do you find the most useful? If you have any funny words of wisdom to add to this collection, share them with us in the comments.
#61 Life Advice from My Dog
Treat every problem as your dog would. If you can't eat it, walk away.
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#62 The Ultimate Gift Hack
It’s the thought that counts... so don’t buy birthday presents, just think about buying them.
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#63 If They Can’t Heal a Plant, Good Luck
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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#64 Pumpkin Picking: Brutally Honest Edition
Take your kids to a pumpkin patch and let them pick out any pumpkin. Then, make them carry it to the car. They’ll never want to go back there again.
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#65 Waiting for a reply like it’s dial-up internet
Don't worry if a person hasn't texted you back. Most people only check their phone every three seconds.
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#66 When bad choices team up
Never break two laws at the same time because that’s how you get caught.
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#67 Abs or nah, still delicious
Just because waffles are pancakes with abs doesn't mean eating them gives you abs.
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#68 Fake it ‘til the dishes look done
Is your sink full of dirty utensils? Put some clean dishes in the draining rack! Now it looks like you’re working on it.
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#69 The Most Honest Excuse Yet
If you're late, just say, "Sorry I'm late, I was at home sitting down."
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#70 Welcome to Life’s Bird Droppings Club
There will come a day when you get pooped on. Just know that it is going to happen and there’s nothing you can do about it.
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#71 Plotting my snack heist already
Count your eggs before they hatch. That way you’ll know if someone steals one of them.
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#72 Clocking time with zero effort
If you ever want to know the time but don't have a watch, use your phone as a sun dial. Always works.
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#73 Hangry Choices Are Real
Don't make decisions without eating first.
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#74 Mom’s hotline always open
When in doubt, always ask your mother.
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#75 Accidental Accuracy Is Still Accuracy
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
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#76 Happiness Doesn’t Do GPS
Don’t follow what you think is the right way; make your way to what you think is happiness.
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#77 Cold roads call for southern grandma energy
If you rarely drive on snow, just pretend you're taking your grandma to church. There's a platter of biscuits and 2 gallons of sweet tea in glass jars in the back seat. She's wearing a new dress and holding a crock pot full of gravy.
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#78 Procrastinating regret never pays off
If you're drinking to forget, pay in advance.
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#79 Pro Moves Only
Don't squat with your spurs on.
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#80 Instant Mic Drop Energy
If any person tries to hurt you, tell them I have a gun, a shovel, and an alibi.
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