Remember the movie Police Academy? If yes, you can just skip right to our selection of police jokes because you already know what to expect from them! If not, keep on reading, and we’ll tell you all about it.
First off, these cop jokes aren’t a sort of mockery - this has been done many times before, and we’re not willing to continue with the tradition. Instead, these police officer jokes are mainly based on situational comedy because, let’s admit it - being a law enforcement professional gets you into predicaments unmatched by any other occupation. And this will be the basis of our funny jokes about police. Well, okay, maybe a couple of police dad jokes about doughnuts, but that’s it, you have our promise. Next to these sorts of funny cop jokes, there are also jokes for police officers - something they might find relatable or painfully true.
So, our selection of police officer jokes begins with just a scroll down below - you should definitely check them out. Once you’re done reading, be sure to give the best jokes your vote! And after that, you might want to share these cop jokes with your friends, too.
#61
A women gets pulled over. Attempting to get out of a ticket, she tries, as the police officer is walking to her car, to try flirting. "Hi," she says seductively. "Hi," he replies. "I thought you didn't give pretty ladies tickets?" She pouts. "You're right, we don't. Here's your ticket, have a nice day."
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#62
Guy gets pulled over by the police officer.
Police officer: "It seems you have been drinking. Could you say the alphabet starting with the letter "M"."
Guy: "No problem. Malphabet."
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#63

Did you hear the celery got arrested?
They charged him with stalking.
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#64
Police officer: “When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55 at least.”
Driver: “You’re wrong, officer. It’s only my hat that makes me look that old.”
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#65
Why did they arrest the cap?
It was covering for the marker.
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#66
I asked a rookie what he would do if he had to arrest his mother.
He said, “I’d call for backup!”
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#67
Why did the thief wear blue gloves?
He didn’t want to be caught red-handed.
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#68
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Dishes.
Dishes who?
Dishes the police. Open up!
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#69

Why are policemen such great volleyball players?
They know how to serve and protect.
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#70
On what show do police officers solve crimes committed by garden gnomes?
"Lawn & Order".
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#71
Police officer: “Where do you think you’re going?”
Driver: “Donut shop, officer.”
Police officer: “At 80 miles per hour?”
Driver: “I wanted to make sure I beat you there, so there would still be donuts to buy.”
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#72
Why couldn’t police notify the family of the murdered baker?
He was a John Dough.
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#73
Did you hear they arrested the Energizer bunny?
He was charged with battery.
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#74
A police officer gives a woman a speeding ticket and she wants to know why he didn’t give her a warning first. The officer says, “Ma’am, there are warnings posted up and down this highway. They say, 'Speed Limit 65.'”
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#75
Why is a traffic officer the strongest man in the world?
Because he can stop a 10-ton truck by holding up his hand!
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#76

Police officer: “I’m going to follow you to the nearest police station.”
Me: “What for?”
Police officer: “I’ve forgotten the way.”
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#77

A police officer arrested a bottle of water because it was wanted in three different states. Solid, liquid and gas.
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#78
A officer caught a graffiti artist spraying a police station in a thick font.
Before cuffing the artist, he looked at the mural and said, “Now that is bold.”
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#79
"The police are trying to say I assaulted a guy with a sheet of sandpaper. All I did was rough him up a bit."
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#80
"A week after my wife went missing, the police told me I should expect the worst-case scenario. So I went back to the charity shop and retrieved all her old clothes."
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