Telling little white lies to your child every now and then is certainly not a bad thing. In some cases, namely, that of Santa Clause and the Tooth Fairy, bending the truth can inspire a sense of wonder in a kid's mind - and keep them on their best behavior if they know presents under the tree are at stake. Other times, these little lies are simply the only way to get stubborn, critical young minds to move in the right direction.
Using "alternative facts" in raising kids, however, can occasionally misfire. If your young detective catches you in a lie, you're in hot water. "Kids globalize and say, ‘My parent is a liar. Are they also lying about loving me?’" Canadian parenting expert Alyson Schafer told The Washington Post in 2015. On the importance of owning up to your funny lies, and making up for it, though, she added that “making a mistake gracefully is a really important parenting skill.”
In other words, as long as you make sure to backtrack and let them know that eating watermelon seeds won't actually turn them into a watermelon before they make it to high school, you're in the clear. A heartfelt apology and an ice cream cone also never hurt anyone.
Check out some of the most clever and funny things to say to your kids below, and if you still need more inspiration, you can find our previous post on this here. Also, don't forget to add yours to the list!
#201
"Everytime you pick your nose Santa takes away a present with your name on it."
Report
3points
#202
When I was younger, if I woke her up and needed medicine, she told me that to go right to sleep because with "night medicine", you have to be asleep in 15 minutes or else the medicine would not work... I believed her well into my childhood.
3points
#203
My mom told us, that the yeast in her freshly baken bread continues to grow in the warm stomach and it could burst. So we never asked to eat the bread when it was still warm. We waited until our mother told us, that it was „safe to eat“.
3points
#204
I was always told by my parents that if I ate the crusts on my sandwiches my hair would go curly. I'm 36 and I still eat all my crusts…but my hair is as poker straight as ever. 😆 Thanks Mum & Dad!
3points
#205
I complained to my dad that my food has ants. He said that it will make my singing voice better and beautiful. I swallowed the ants anyway. :)
3points
#206
My dad told us we had to hold our breath when passing a cemetery or ghosts would haunt us. There were some huge cemeteries and I would almost pass out trying to hold my breath!
3points
#207
If I forgot to be tooth fairy. I told my kids they must of pulled their tooth too late in the day. And tooth fairy picked up teeth in the order they became available. So they must be on the next nights schedule.
3points
#208
My friend decided to become vegetarian at 6. Her father told her that drumsticks came from trees, so she could eat them. For years, all she ate were drumsticks.
3points
#209
I told my kid that there was a "Mommy Book" and one of the rules in it was that I had to tell them "no" thirteen times a day. Then I would say "Ask for something! I think I'm behind!"
3points
#210
My mum was a single parent and when I was very young I asked her who my Dad was. She told me I was a gift from God. For a period of my childhood I thought I was the second coming.
3points
#211
My grandma told my mom that the right boob was for white milk and the left was for chocolate milk. She believed that until she took Sex Ed in high school.
Unknown
Report2points
#212
My dad told me that pushing the seat recline button on an airplane helps the plane take off, and that if not enough people push it the plane would crash.
Unknown
Report2points
#213
I was told swallowing watermelon seeds would grow in my stomach.
I had a very nerve wracking couple of months waiting.
I had a very nerve wracking couple of months waiting.
Report
2points
#216
"The toy shop is not working today. Today is "the day of the week". They don't open at this day of the week."
2points
#217
My Dad used to say the hazard lights button was to eject the passenger seat so I never pushed it once he pushed I freaked out thinking I was going to eject out of the car
2points
#218
My mom said that the little brown freckles/little birthmarks came from drinking too much Cola, so i never drank it. I believed it till I was 12 years or something.
2points
#219
My Dad has a bald patch and hated broccoli, so my Mum told me if i didn't eat the broccoli I would have bald patch when I was older. Still think broccoli affects hair growth 10 years later.
2points
#220
My mum told me that mountain goats can only go one way round a mountain because their legs are shorted on one side. I was 13 when I blithely repeated this "fact" and she started laughing uncontrollably and confessed it was a lie her father had told her as a child.
2points