Hello and welcome to our latest edition in the jokes section. This time, the topic is the epitome of all hospital jokes, the winner in all the medical jokes categories, and something that is even spicier than doctor jokes themselves. Are you ready to guess the topic here? Sure you are - it’s nurse jokes! Jokes dedicated to probably the most dedicated people in medicine who are worthy of nothing else but high praise!
As you’re about to see, these aren’t exactly jokes about nurses but rather jokes for nurses. We just couldn’t bear to make even the friendliest kind of fun of these specialists who saw us through the last couple of years of the pandemic with relentless heroism, saving tens of thousands of lives. Thus, this compilation of funny nurse jokes is more for them rather than about them. A way to pay our respects and provide at least the tiniest bit of comedic relief in their day. And we’ve set the bar for ourselves pretty high here, so hopefully, these hilarious jokes will fulfill their mission!
However, even if you’re not a nurse yourself, chances are you’ll also find these jokes quite amusing. All you have to do is scroll on down to check them out and then give the best jokes your vote! Lastly, share this article with your friends and anyone to whom these jokes might be of concern.
#101
How do night nurses feel when they think about their early days at the hospital and want to go back?
They feel nursetalgic.
unknown
Report6points
#102
What would you call a night nurse that cared more about herself than her patient's health?
Nurse-issitic.
unknown
Report6points
#103
Why was the night nurse so indecisive?
She kept changing her shifts.
unknown
Report6points
#104
Why was the squirrel such a good night nurse?
He could handle the ER going nuts after midnight.
unknown
Report6points
#105
Why was the nurse tip-toeing around the medicine cabinet?
She was scared of waking up the sleeping pills.
unknown
Report6points
#106
Did you read about the night nurse who was squashed by a load of books?
The only person she could blame was hershelf.
unknown
Report6points
#107
Do you know why that man sent the nurse an X-ray of his entire chest?
He wanted to tell her that his heart was indeed in the right place.
unknown
Report6points
#108
All bleeding stops. Eventually.
unknown
Report6points
#109
A rookie nurse tries to make friends with everyone.
An experienced nurse knows to use that energy only to befriend the cafeteria cooks, pharmacists, and discharge planner.
unknown
Report6points
#110
A nurse, a doctor, and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar.
The nurse sits down at the bar and says, “I’ll have a Bloody Mary!”
The doctor sits next to her and says, “Give me a rum and coke!”
The anti-vaxver says, “No shots for me.”
unknown
Report6points
#111
Why are nurses afraid of the outdoors?
Too much poison IV.
unknown
Report5points
#112
Never upset a pediatric nurse.
They have very little patients.
unknown
Report5points
#113
"I went to visit my sister at the hospital, but after driving around the only parking spot I found was in the C section. I had to climb out of the sunroof."
unknown
Report5points
#114
A priest, rabbi, and minister all had to go to the hospital. Turns out, they got alcohol poisoning from going to the bar so much.
unknown
Report5points
#115
Nurse: Anything else I can get you?
Patient: A million dollars!
unknown
Report5points
#116
My best friend’s name is Pam. She’s pretty low-key and great to be around. She goes by Loraze Pam, Diaze Pam, or Clonaze Pam.
unknown
Report5points
#117
Know what a nurse and a wood frog have in common?
They can both hold their bladder for a really long time.
unknown
Report5points
#118
Murphy’s Law of Nursing #47: The poop almost always misses the Chux pad despite your best efforts.
unknown
Report5points
#119
Never try lying to an X-ray technician. They can see right through you.
unknown
Report5points
#120
A man was wheeled into the operating room, but at the last minute, he had a change of heart.
unknown
Report5points
