Will we ever get bored with The Office? No! Will there ever be too many articles about it? Probably not! And let's not forget the countless The Office memes that keep the show's humor alive.
Have we ever dedicated a post solely to Michael Scott’s quotes? Not yet, but we are about to fix that blunder with this collection of his most ingenious quotes! All one hundred and thirty-three of them to make you relive perhaps the best moments of the series.
So, what do we know about Michael Gary Scott? Born in 1965, he’s about to turn fifty-seven this year on March 15th (mark it on your calendar!). So, just a couple of years younger than the legendary comedian who portrayed him in the series, Steve Carell.
We also know that Gary had a pretty lonely childhood and never attended college, having lost all his tuition money in a pyramid scheme. Also, all he ever wanted was friends, and that’s why he chose the life of a salesman, ultimately landing a job as the Scranton branch manager at Dunder Mifflin.
And, you definitely know the rest - he’s the most unorthodox boss with the weirdest sense of humor and a very inappropriate understanding of social norms. So, basically, one of the most fantastic comedy characters ever created.
Okay, but let’s go back to Michael Scott’s quotes - from ‘How the turntables’ to various threats to Toby; you will definitely find all of his brilliant thoughts here. Some of these quotes you might know by heart, while other wise words of Michael’s might’ve gone under your radar before. But, no worries, as this is precisely the purpose of this article - to give you a chance to memorize all of Michael’s funny quotes!
So, put on your ‘fun jeans,’ scroll down just one Angela, and check out the hilarious quotes for yourself! Vote for the best quotes that are the epitome of Michael Scott to you, and don’t forget to share this cheerful article with your office coworkers!
#61 Roleplaying Dementors vs. Office Drama
"The worst thing about prison was the Dementors. They were flying all over the place and they were scary and they'd come down and they'd suck the soul out of your body and it hurt!"- In an attempt to scare the office straight from thinking prison is better than Dunder Mifflin.
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#62 When Clothes Blur the Labels
“There were these huge bins of clothes and everybody was rifling through them like crazy. And I grabbed one and it fit! So, I don’t think that this is totally just a woman’s suit. At the very least it’s bisexual.”- Michael really, really messed up the definition of what it means to be bisexual.
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#63 When loyalty gets a little too real
“Granted, maybe this was not the best idea but at least we care enough about our employees that we are willing to fight for them. And if you so much as harm a hair on Stanley's head, we will burn Utica to the ground.”
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#64 Lincoln Wouldn’t Let That Slide
“Abraham Lincoln once said that, ‘If you’re a racist, I will attack you with the North.’ And those are the principles that I carry with me in the workplace.”
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#65 Well, There Goes the Party
“You all took a life here today. You did. The life of the party.”
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#66 Intern energy: ugly truth but solid work
Andy Bernard: “That kid is the worst. Needs to be fired, Michael.”
Michael Scott: “He’s not the worst. OK? He’s not the worst. You know who’s the worst? That intern we had a few years ago. That guy. Remember? That face, how ugly he was? He was the worst. Good worker, though.”
Michael Scott: “He’s not the worst. OK? He’s not the worst. You know who’s the worst? That intern we had a few years ago. That guy. Remember? That face, how ugly he was? He was the worst. Good worker, though.”
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#67 When “Negative” Is Actually a Win
“Well, apparently in the medicine community, negative means good. Which makes absolutely no sense. In the real world community, that would… be… chaos.“
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#68 Oops, Stereotypes Just Got Played
“Close your eyes. Picture a convict. What’s he wearing? Nothing special, baseball cap on backwards, baggy pants… he says something ordinary like… ‘yo, thats shizzle.’ Okay. Now slowly open your eyes again. Who are you picturing? A black man? Wrong. That was a white woman. Surprised? Well, shame on you.“
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#69 Degree? Nah, Legends Skip That Step
"I did not go to business school. You know who else didn't go to business school? LeBron James, Tracy McGrady, Kobe Bryant. They went right from high school to the NBA."
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#70 Master of all (time) trades
“I’m an early bird and a night owl. So I’m wise and have worms.”
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#71 When “Because I Hate Him” Counts as a Cause
"I have cause. It is beCAUSE I hate him."- Michael needs a reasonable cause to fire Toby. To Michael, hate is the only cause he needs.
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#72 Mood: Frozen Mid-Meeting
“Jan is cold. If she was sitting across from you on a train and she wasn’t moving, you might think she was dead.”- Michael describes his boss.
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#73 Forwarding Like a Pro, No Cap
“I don’t come up with this stuff, I just forward it along. You wouldn’t arrest the guy who was just passing drugs from one guy to another.”- Michael on email forwarding.
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#74 That’s Actually A Lie
Michael: “You want to hear a lie?”
Toby: “What?”
Michael: “I think you’re great. You’re my best friend.”
Toby: “What?”
Michael: “I think you’re great. You’re my best friend.”
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#75 Boundaries Even Bosses Won’t Cross
"There are certain things a boss does not share with his employees. His salary, that would depress them. His bed, it— And I am not going to tell them that I’ll be reading their e-mails."
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#76 Squad Goals, But Make It Work
“Do I have a special someone? Well, yeah, of course. A bunch of ’em. My employees.“
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#77 When Your Family Tree Becomes a Loop
“I feel like all my kids grew up and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream.”
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#78 Perfectly Confused, As Usual
“And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”
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#79 Pro-Level Flirting, Thanks to Trainwrecks
“I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk, and I learn. I absorb information from the strategies of the winners and the losers. Actually, I probably learn more from the losers.”
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#80 Mastering mystery isn’t the goal
“Any man who says he totally understands women is a fool. Because they are un-understandable.”
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