Grandmas are completely out of this world. They are the most caring people who love you, spoil you, share their badass granny stories, and give you the best advice ever. However, grandmas are also fantastic for a host of other reasons. For instance, their struggle with modern technologies is an urban legend, and their old-school sense of humor is worthy of a saga.
It is precisely this duality that makes the perfect recipe for funny grandma jokes. Not convinced? Well then, check out our list of granny jokes that your grandma will find relatable and will make you giggle. These cute grandma jokes, same as grannies themselves, aren’t one-trick ponies, so expect a wide variety of topics discussed. From knitting to weird grandparent texts, from cooking to having geriatric fun, these clever jokes will leave no stones unturned in our cherished matter of grandmothers.
After all, our meemaws are worthy of our best efforts! While a real granny would’ve stuffed your rumbling belly with a hearty home-cooked meal in the time it took you to read this intro, these silly grandma jokes will nourish your soul instead. Which isn’t all that bad when you come to think of it.
Get ready for some innocent fun with these old-people jokes. Upvote your favorite one-liners and share them with your Nana. We assure you that these are all clean jokes to tell your grandma, and she will surely give her stamp of approval. Let’s get started!
#41
"Did your grandma give you her bread recipe?"
"Yes, we often trade recipes on a knead-to-know basis."
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#42
My grandmother offered me a melon for my evening snack.
I was feeling melon-cholic.
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#43
My brother was feeling shy while singing karaoke in front of the whole family. Grandma said, "Don't be shy, just duet."
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#44
My father told my grandmother every day that she needs a new hearing aid, but she would not listen.
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#45
My boss at work said to me today, “Do you believe in the supernatural and life after death?”
“Yes, I think so,” I replied.
He said, “I thought you probably would. Yesterday after you left early to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she phoned up to talk to you.”
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#46
My friend told me his family was having a 92nd birthday party for his grandma.
I said, “That’s awesome, but you can’t really have much of a party in a minute and a half.”
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#47
An old man is lying on his death bed. When he smells the delicious aroma of freshly baked apple pie. He calls over his grandson and whispers, "Boy, go ask your grandma for a slice of that pie." The boy scampers off and returns a minute later, replying, "Grandma says no, it's for after the funeral."
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#48
My grandma is 80% Irish. People call her Iris.
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#49
My grandma just asked me, "Son, what's your retirement plan?"
I said, "It's you."
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#50
Grandma was making lasagna when suddenly an entire US division came crashing through her door. She put a little too much oil in the lasagna.
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#51
How come grandmas are so good at learning different languages so quickly?
They are always grandma-tically correct.
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#52
What changed grandma's opinion about heart transplants?
She had a change of heart.
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#53
I suggested that my grandmother throw a space-themed party. She's asked me to plan-et.
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#54
My grandmother retired from the job of a Math teacher. She is figuring out the aftermath.
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#55
Since it started snowing, all my grandma has done is stare through the window.
If it gets any worse ill need to let her back in.
If it gets any worse ill need to let her back in.
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#56
"As a family we couldn't decide whether to have grandma buried or cremated
So in the end, we let her live." – Gary Delaney
So in the end, we let her live." – Gary Delaney
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#57
I keep telling my Grandma that she needs hearing aids. But she just won't listen.
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#58
My Grandma told me all her friends had AIDS. I told her I was sorry for them and she asked me to speak up. She too had AIDS, hearing aids.
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#59
An old woman is lying on her deathbed when her youngest granddaughter, holding back tears, says to her: "I love you, Grandma." The old woman replies:
"Oh yeah? Name 3 of my albums."
"Oh yeah? Name 3 of my albums."
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#60
My grandma changed her hair color while taking a nap. She dyed peacefully in her sleep.
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