Hark and listen to the sky! Join our boat o' fun with these 'ere charmin' boating jokes!
Whether ye be a sailor, a gentleman o' fortune, or a lord o' unknown breeding, these 'ere jokes will tickle yer jolly bone an' see ye through a storm o' laughter. Totally unscathed an' safe, yet with jolly tears in yer eyes!
Okay, pardon us for this piratesque intermission - somehow it's always the gentleman o' fortune that pops into our heads when thinking about anything at least remotely related to the seven seas. Say, something like these sailing jokes here!
That's right, it's our collection of jolly good jokes about boats, and even if the sea for you is sandy beaches and vacations, there will be at least one of these hilarious jokes that you'll feel deeply touched by. Meaning, of course, it will bring a gale of laughter! And might make you want to get a pet parrot while you're at it.
Anyway, boat jokes are definitely not just for pirates, fishermen, and fancy people - they're for everyone! And, if you feel these sail jokes will do you some good, too, then scroll on down below to check them out. Once you are done, give the best jokes your vote, and share this article with your friends!
#61
Why are pirates so bad at learning alphabets?
Because they always get stuck at C.
Because they always get stuck at C.
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#62
What was the sailor worried about this time?
To not go overboard.
To not go overboard.
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#63
What ship is most liked by all the vampires?
Blood vessel.
Blood vessel.
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#64
Why was the kid so happy about dreaming of sailing in a sea full of soda?
Because it was just a Fanta-sea.
Because it was just a Fanta-sea.
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#65
Why did the laughter-ship sink very often?
Because the anchor took a break!
Because the anchor took a break!
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#67
Worry less and paddle more.
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#68
How do you make luxury yacht charters look younger?
Boat-Tox.
Boat-Tox.
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#69
Why do scuba divers fall backwards off the boat?
Because if they fell forward they’d still be on the boat.
Because if they fell forward they’d still be on the boat.
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#70
What did the boat say at the funeral?
"My gondolences."
"My gondolences."
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#71
What do you call it when one boat follows another boat too closely?
Sailgating.
Sailgating.
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#72
What do you call a pirate that skips class?
Captain Hooky!
Captain Hooky!
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#73
What did the canal say to the cargo boat that passed through uninvited?
“You can’t just barge in like that!”
“You can’t just barge in like that!”
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#74
I can’t think of any more boat puns.
Canoe?
Canoe?
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#75
A group of friends were on a boat in Munich when the hull was breached.
They quickly called for the German Life Guard yelling “Help we’re sinking!”
The Life Guard asked, “Ja, vat are you sinking about?”
They quickly called for the German Life Guard yelling “Help we’re sinking!”
The Life Guard asked, “Ja, vat are you sinking about?”
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#76
Two sailors are talking:
Sailor A: “I hear fish is good brain food.”
Sailor B: “Yeah, I eat it all the time.”
Sailor A: “Well, there goes another theory!”
Sailor A: “I hear fish is good brain food.”
Sailor B: “Yeah, I eat it all the time.”
Sailor A: “Well, there goes another theory!”
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#77
Two people are out sailing when suddenly a hand appears in the sea.
“What’s this?” asked the skipper, “It looks as if someone is drowning!”
“No,” explained his crew, “It’s just a little wave.”
“What’s this?” asked the skipper, “It looks as if someone is drowning!”
“No,” explained his crew, “It’s just a little wave.”
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#78
Why shouldn’t boats hit certain islands?
It takes atoll on them.
It takes atoll on them.
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#79
I bought a sail for my boat on Amazon the other day. Today it dawned on me that it's not the right size so I called to cancel. They said it's too late.
That sail has shipped.
That sail has shipped.
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#80
H. Clinton and D. Trump are In a boat and the boat sprung a leak. Who is saved?
The world.
The world.
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