“He Threw It Out The Window”: 58 People Share The Things Their Partners Don’t Know They Know

He occasionally buys cookies when I'm at work and eats them all. It's fine, I sometimes eat candy only after he's gone to bed. Guess neither of us like to share our treats.

So much cheating on here.

Anyway, here’s one- my wife of 15 years (together for 19) has a ‘secret’ savings account.
Her family has some bad luck with marriage, and she was really slow to marry me because she didn’t want to be ‘trapped’.

So she saved up several month’s worth of living expenses. She hasn’t really touched it since, and has never mentioned it to me. It’s the only account with statements emailed directly to her, rather than an email we both access.

It’s absolutely there so that she could, if needed, leave. It’s not a fortune by any means, but could keep her afloat for ~3-4 months.
I tried to gently bring it up once, as a hypothetical, and she flat out denied it (in a ‘doth protest too much’ kind of way). I told her it would be ok with me either way.

Truth is, I really don’t mind. It makes her feel better, and we’ve built a fantastic life together. I know she views it more as an insurance policy than anything else, and figure if we ever really do need the money we’ll cross that bridge then.

Plus I suppose she’s still married to me because she wants to be, not because she has to be.

He's embarrassed to bring me around his friends.

He really likes to get his back lightly scratched before bed, I generally do it to help him fall asleep. There has been many times he will go to bed early and fake going to sleep just to get his back scratched. I go along with it because I know it makes him happy but he thinks he has been scheming me this whole time...

Everybody likes snacks, right? Some of us like chips, others like fruit, or yogurt. Well, my wife likes croutons. Frozen croutons to be exact and she tries to hide it like an alcoholic hides bottles of vodka. Where does she hide the croutons? In the freezer. At first I'd put them in the pantry when we get home from the grocery store, but they'd always end up in the freezer. I'd be like, "Uh, hon, what's up with the croutons in the freezer?" and she'd act like she had no idea what I was talking about. Now here's the thing, I've tried them and now I'm obsessed with to them too. So now I openly eat cold croutons out of the freezer as a snack, and she tells me what a weirdo I am while she eats half the bag with me. No idea why she's embarassed to admit what a genius she is for discovering such an awesome snack. BTW, the best kind is Chatham Village garlic and cheese flavor.

My ex used to pretend to have various illnesses, but I saw him get his 'medication' once and they were just various vitamins from tesco.

He had a problem but it wasn't anything he was claiming to have. I didn't even see it as a warning sign, hindsight is 20/20.

Edit: He may have had Munchhausens but a more likely explanation is that he was an attention seeker. You don't have to diagnose everyone, reddit.
Edit 2: Everyone with munchhausens is attention seeking, not everyone attention seeking has munchhausens.

I am fairly certain that my wife no longer wants to be married to me. After the birth of our child (almost four years ago), the bedroom has dried up, her interest in me as a partner (both physical attraction and character appeal) has dwindled to almost zero, and talk of future plans has all but stopped. I'm not sure why she hasn't given me the boot or what I have done to cause this change... Well that wasn't nearly as cathartic as I'd hoped it would be.

TL/DR: My wife wants to leave me, and she doesn't think that I know.

Edit* Thanks for the advice everyone. I think that it's time to have a talk with my wife. On our next day home together, the kid will go to the grandparents and we will have a talk. Thanks everyone. Wish us luck.

My wife and I started dating when we were fifteen. We broke up here and there, but were on most of that time. We went to different colleges, but were mostly together. Then grad school, same deal, only we ended up renting an apartment together and sharing more than hallways and back seats of cars. We got married, got real jobs, bought a house. We have been together for more than half of our lives, we're 38 and 39 years old now. We have two wonderful kids together, a boy and a girl, five and three years old, and my wife isn't just the best wife in the world, she's also, apparently, the best mom in the world. That said, I know for sure she knows how to use the remote. I caught her switching the tv from cable to PS3, then log into Netflix, then navigate to a movie. When she says, "can you put on the movie, I don't know how," I know she's a healthy, intelligent, successful, athletic, active, funny, caring, loving, kind, generous, selfless phony. I love my wife beyond anything and I'm glad she asks for my help at times, even when not needed.

Not current SO but he had a 4 year old daughter that he never saw and didn't tell me. I found out via my STEP sister whose dad is best friends with his mom.

About 10 years ago my wife drunkenly made out with a guy friend of hers at a birthday party. I only knew because she left her messaging client open where she confessed it to her best friend. I let it slide because she seemed genuinely upset that she did it and vowed to her friend that it would never happen again. We've been married for over 20 years now so it hasn't dampened the relationship at all.

Now mind you I never left the two of them together alone again. I'm forgiving, not stupid.

Broke up a few days ago, but she would send lewd snaps of herself before/after showering to her guy friend. One time I was just laying in bed and she went to shower, turned the water on, heard her clothes fall to the floor, then I heard the iPhone camera sound. Didn’t think anything of it. Weeks later, similar situation, I walk in to use the restroom and see her camera right as she takes a Snapchat of her. I couldn’t read the name of the recipient, but name had unmistakable emojis on it and I knew who it for. I just said “oookay” and did my business. She kind of fumbled some sort of excuse but I just didn’t say anything. Broke up the following week for a multitude of reasons, but that definitely didn’t help any.

I know that he beats himself up constantly for the things he can't give us. Tonight is our anniversary and we can't do anything because we're broke. He's had our kids all day so I can do homework and has been eating himself alive about the whole situation. What he doesn't know is that I don't care. I'm just happy he's mine. He's a great dad and a great husband.

She text her ex all day every day..selfies, tells him he misses him, they have movie text dates where they watch the same movie at the same time, they fall asleep on the phone together. Worst for me is they talk trash about me and she refers to me as 'number three' as in her third boyfriend. She makes stuff up and will tell him somthing I did that never happened. She never agrees to meet up with him in person although he frequently tries. She will occasionally mention to me 'oh my ex is texting me hes so annoying,' meanwhile shes waiting for me to sleep so she can watch a movie with him. Sucks finding out through our kids tablet that is synced with her phone, im still not sure how or when im going to break it off.

My wife sneaks beef jerky, we've been vegetarians for 20 years. Well, I've been vegetarian for twenty years.

After five years, I still catch her touching up her make up as she’s parked outside before she comes in and she’s never mentioned that she does this. Makes me feel bad when I’m already in shorts and a t-shirt.

I know he considered leaving me two years ago (10yrs together now)

He has no idea I know. He had a plane ticket booked and everything.

I know every once in a blue moon he snoops through my computer for... something? I'm not sure what he's looking for but it's fine. Sometimes people have insecurity issues.

Was not married but I found out about it.

Found out a then-gf was bulimic. After living together for a few months I came home, when she was at work, to cook chicken in the oven. I could not find the cooking dish to put the chicken on. I looked everywhere in the kicthen and all around the house. Last place to look was under our bed....I found the tray with crumbs of brownies. I immediately knew what was up. I confronted her right away when she came home and she screamed at me and said it was wrong of me to find out.

Not together anymore but she used to pick her nose and wipe the boogers on the underside of the standalone sink that I installed. Ever once and a while I would clean the sink and scrape them off and they would reappear. For a while I figured she knew I knew but still did it anyway, now I think she just genuinely did it without ever thinking about it.

When my husband and I first started dating he didn’t know how to tell me he didn’t enroll for college this year so he would pretend to go to class everyday and go hangout with one of his friends. I started to catch on when I noticed a pattern of him always skipping class or if we were doing something and I remember he was supposed to have class he would always just say it’s cool, I don’t need to go. The final straw was when it was mid terms and he still hadn’t bought any books.

I never called him out about it and after a few months he finally came clean. We didn’t fight about it, I said I was disappointed that he didn’t think I would understand the situation. (He didn’t enroll because he was having some family issues, which he didn’t want to burden me with because we had only been together a few months.) He is a big ball of anxiety so I knew it wasn’t from a malicious place what so ever.

Still together and married and stronger than ever.