33 Times Restaurant Workers Deserved A Bonus Just For Keeping A Straight Face Over These Orders

Walked in 5 minutes before close, ordered the Beef Wellington. The server explained that it takes 30 minutes to cook. They said that's fine.

Point of advice: If you walk into an empty restaurant at the end of the night, and the server mentions a long wait for food, maybe reconsider your order. Everyone wanted to go home except that guy.

jim_br:

I had a manager (banking) that was an absolute PITA to work with. On one business trip, we landed 3 hours late and every restaurant in town is closed/closing. He convinced a Pizza Hut 15 minutes before closing, to let us dine in — four people. They reluctantly agreed.
After being seated, he asked how many people are on duty, the waitress replied three. He opened his wallet and counted out $300 and asked her to distribute it as a thank you.
After dinner, the bill came and it’s about $50-60. He dropped another $100 and thanked the waitress. My coworker looked at him and quite seriously said, “I had no idea you could be kind!” He laughed and acknowledged he worked in restaurants while in college and that’s where he reserves his kindness.

I once had a guy ask if we could “sear the steak rare but without any pink.” He wanted “cooked blood.” I still have nightmares.

moosebeast:

I saw a guy in a restaurant order a steak rare, then when it arrived he complained that it was pink in the middle.
I honestly think some guys don't know what rare means but have heard that it's how you're supposed to ask for your steak.

At a Tex-Mex restaurant - Cheese nachos without the chips.

Yes they did receive a plate of shredded cheese microwaved onto a plate.

Yes they used the free appetizer chips to eat that cheese.

unclemikey0:

I worked at a Mexican restaurant for a few years in college, and had a customer just trying to invent his own dish. Like not even "can I have that burrito, but with chicken instead" or "throw some jalapenos on it". But more like, just skipping around the menu and picking different ingredients from all over the places to create his own dish that we don't have. I had to tell him there was no way I was going to be able to communicate to the kitchen what he wants, or figure out how to charge him. Unless he wants me to order eleven different sides of things and he can't put it together himself, so he should just order something from the menu please.

Almost worse, and I bet everyone that's worked a restaurant can relate to this, was when former employees would come in and try to order their old favorite thing that they had created back in the day because as a waiter they knew all the modifiers on the computer. Bro, I get it, and I do that now too, but we're really busy, please just order something from the menu. I ain't in the mood right now to order Beef and Bean burrito (sub steak) (sub queso (inside)) (no tomato) (no lettuce) (sub pico) (green Chile (half)) (sour cream sauce (half)) (no onion sub fajita veg) + ((no rice and beans) sub kids nachos(no cheese sub guac)). You could get away with this when it was your employee meal at the end of your shift, and I bet the cooks hated you for it back then too.

As someone who worked in sushi restaurants for the better part of a decade, you will never believe the number of people who get mad when you serve them raw fish. At the sushi restaurant.

Vegan mussels.

A whole onion. Ate it like it was an apple.

Once I had a customer in the drive through order a dozen chocolate donuts.

Sounds pretty normal, except I worked at a burger king and we did not have chocolate donuts.

I asked him to repeat himself, and he confidently said again, "a dozen chocolate donuts"

I said "sir we don't have donuts here."

He said "...where am I?"

I said "this is burger king"

Then I heard his wife in the passenger seat start cracking up then he sheepishly said "I thought this was Tim Hortons" and he sped away 😂.

Working at a TCBY and this fancy older gentleman (he was Italian and had gold chains, a deep tan, open shirt, and a equally fancy lady with him) asks to buy the “painting” we had hanging on the wall. This wasn’t a special painting, it was probably what they send to all TCBY stores when they open. I got my manager, she haggled a bit and in the end he got it. They get their FroYo, pull the painting off the wall, and in the most outrageous Italian accent says as he’s walking out the door, “When I see something I like, I BUY IT!” 🤣 I still quote that guy all the time.

Was in a vegetarian restaurant and overheard a patron ask if he could have his dish with a steak.

I had a customer who aparently had a very restrictive health diet. I spent about 15 minutes telling her all the ingredients in everything. She kept getting upset that we didn't have USDA-certified organic produce (We weren't in the United states, so USDA...isn't a thing)

She finally settled on a vegan salad bowl, with numerous alterations. After reading out every ingredient, the kitchen made her food. She ate half of it, then brought it back and said "I forgot that I wasn't going to eat rice any more, can you remake it without rice"

I simply said "I'm sorry that you forgot that, but you were informed of all ingredients".

With a friend at Bob Evans in grad school before classes. As we were getting ready to leave a man came in, asked for 2 bowls of sausage gravy and a Country time Lemonade. Waitress asked how many biscuits he wanted. “None, just bring two bowls and a spoon.” We left before we could watch that horror occur.

Once worked at a stand that sold burgers and hot dogs. This one guy wanted peanut butter and jelly on his dog in addition to the slaw, chili, onions, mustard, and ketchup. We happened to have some there so I got it for him. He said it was the best thing ever.

Not a restaurant, but my wife and I owned and ran a B&B for about 10 years.

We served a 3-course breakfast on the weekends, and I cooked.
One weekend morning, I was doing custom omelettes to order.

One guest asked for her omelette to be cooked using no fat of any kind - no oil, no butter, etc., apparently for health reasons.

Now, that's pretty difficult to pull off, even with a non-stick pan.
At least for me - I don't have any actual food service training.
So, I wound up putting a little bit of water in the pan, and it turned out ok.

She loved it, and the couple became repeat customers.
So, whenever they booked, we did omelettes:-).

I was the customer. I had just moved from Boston to Ohio and asked our waitress for a "fork". The waitress thought I was asking for something entirely different. After asking me to repeat my request, it became clear that she was really upset. I couldn't understand why she was so upset until the other members of our party jumped in and let her know that my accent caused certain words to sound differently than what I intended. From then on I always requested a "four-pronged eating utensil" instead of a fork.

Reading glasses, they were mad we didn’t have a pair for them at our small restaurant that’s open 4 months out of the year.

At macaroni grill: wanted her chicken breast medium rare.

She argued with my manager for 30 minutes, then got served medium rare chicken.

🤷‍♂️ IDK man.

I worked at a California Pizza Kitchen and once a lady asked for a bowl of spaghetti bolognese but with no pasta. So yeah, a bowl of sauce. Another time, a half iced coffee/half coke.

I was at a Peruvian restaurant; table behind me had 4 Asian ladies who were trying out Peruvian food for the first time. When the ceviche came out, they asked the server if they could actually cook it. In their defense, the menu did say it was "cooked" in lemon juice. Server said no, this is how it's supposed to be eaten. The table asked "Just put it in the microwave for a few minutes; it's too cold.".

A carpaccio, but microwave the meat for 30 seconds please.

Walked confidently behind the bar and wiped her hands with a bar towel bc she did not want to use a paper napkin.

Ordered “the most expensive” single malt scotch mixed with soda.

Requested a zero fat, gluten free vegan pizza.

Requested a complimentary cup of ranch dressing to put on the salad she brought with her from home.

Brought two slices of bread and some cheese and asked the staff to make him a grilled cheese sandwich- said he didn’t need to pay anyone.

Ordered a water on ice, with all the available fruit garnishes, grabbed the bitters and poured half of the bottle into the water. Didn’t want to pay for anything.

Demanded champagne table service, for free, after defending his PHD thesis. He thought the restaurant should charge his professor/advisor afterwards.