Come to think of it, each season has its own weather jokes. Spring brings allergies and wet sneakers, summer is for freaky tanlines and mosquitoes, fall is for being under the weather, and winter is for freezing your behind off. Yeah, we know, those are all the cons of the seasons, but you wouldn’t want to make funny weather jokes out of something that’s genuinely pleasant, right? We thought so! So, let us present to you our magnificent list dedicated to jokes about the weather - there’s a good chance that you’ll find most of them highly relatable.
Basically, weather jokes can be divided into two groups. One would be for when it’s hot and the other for when it’s cold. Now, hot weather jokes might sound alluring when you’re in the depths of winter, but truthfully, thinking about being sweaty all the time and having zero energy to do something due to a heatwave is all but pleasant and inviting. As for the cold weather jokes… Well, it’s never fun to imagine yourself being dressed in so many layers that you become Patrick the Starfish and only having the mobility to be rolled around rather than to walk on your own two feet. Sorry, we did try to come up with redeeming points for extremely hot and freezing cold weather, but there seems to be none! All the better, though, as this way, we get more silly jokes to laugh at.
Now, scroll down below to check out our selection of the very best weather jokes ever. Once you are there, give the best jokes your vote! And since we’re pretty sure your friends would like to laugh at these hilarious jokes, too, share this article with them.
#121
"I was getting ready for a tag sale one summer day. Since it was so humid out, I decided to stay inside my air-conditioned house and mark the special stickers I had bought for the sale. Then I slapped them on my blouse, ran outside, stuck them on the appropriate items and rushed back inside. I did this until every item was labeled. Later that day a UPS man came by the house with a delivery. I noticed that as I was signing for the package, he seemed ill at ease. It was only after he left that I noticed there was one sticker still attached to the front of my blouse. It read "Make me an offer."" -Mary E. Koppelmann
unknown
Report6points
#122
"While in the men's room at a beach park in Florida, I noticed they had a plastic baby-changing table installed on the wall. Apparently, some sportsmen had co-opted this politically correct amenity for their own use. Above the table was a sign saying: "It is unlawful to clean fish on this table."" - Cliff Revell
unknown
Report6points
#123
"When I overheard one of my cashiers tell a customer, "We haven't had it for a while, and I doubt we'll be getting it soon," I quickly assured the customer that we would have whatever it was she wanted by next week. After she left, I read the cashier the riot act."
"Never tell the customer that we're out of anything. Tell them we'll have it next week," I instructed her. "Now, what did she want?"
"Rain."
unknown
Report6points
#124
How do you find out the weather when you’re on vacation?
Go outside and look up.
unknown
Report6points
#125
Local weather reports say there won’t be any rain for a year, but I drought it.
unknown
Report6points
#126
When it rains chickens and ducks, you could say it’s fowl weather.
unknown
Report6points
#127
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
unknown
Report6points
#128
What is hail?
Hard boiled rain!
unknown
Report6points
#129
Why do tornadoes move so erratically?
They are dizzy.
unknown
Report6points
#130
Where is a tornado put in jail to be punished?
In a high pressure cell.
unknown
Report6points
#131
What’s the difference between weather and climate?
You can’t weather a tree, but you can climate!
unknown
Report6points
#132
What did the hurricane say to the palm tree?
Hang onto your leaves, this will be no ordinary breeze.
unknown
Report6points
#133
Why was the lightning grilled on the stove?
To make heat lightning.
unknown
Report6points
#134
What type of lightning likes to play sports?
Ball lightning.
unknown
Report6points
#135
"It was so hot in Beverly Hills, people were frying egg whites on the sidewalk." - Matt Wohlfarth
unknown
Report5points
#136
"On a family vacation one summer, we crossed Wyoming and noted several historical points of interest. The children were especially interested because they enjoyed the computer game "Oregon Trail," which gives players a taste of the hardships the pioneers endured. We stopped at the famous South Pass to look at the wagon tracks still visible in the dirt. Squinting out over the desolate, wind-swept landscape, my daughter nodded and said grimly, "This is where my oxen always die."" - Quin Gilbert
unknown
Report5points
#137
"My two-year-old cousin scared us one summer by disappearing during our lakeside vacation. More than a dozen relatives searched the forest and shoreline, and everyone was relieved when we found Matthew playing calmly in the woods. "Listen to me, Matthew," his mother said sharply. "From now on when you want to go someplace, you tell Mommy first, okay?" Matthew thought about that for a moment and said, "Okay. Disney World."" - Leah Hallenbeck
unknown
Report5points
#138
"The summer after college graduation, I was living at home, fishing in the daytime, spending nights with my friends — generally just hanging out. One afternoon my grandfather, who never went to college, stopped by. Concerned with how I was spending my time, he asked about my future plans. I told him I was in no hurry to tie myself down to a career. "Well," he replied, "you better start thinking about it. You'll be thirty before you know it." "But I'm closer to twenty than to thirty," I protested. "I won't be thirty for eight more years." "I see," he said, smiling. "And when will you be twenty again?"" - Marshall K. Essig
unknown
Report5points
#139
"On a recent vacation at a resort with my in-laws, we planned to spend an afternoon at the pool with our kids. We wanted to bring our own drinks, but were unsure of the hotel's policy. My brother-in-law called the front desk, and assuming everyone was familiar with the brand of ice chest he had, asked if it was all right if he brought a Playmate to the pool. After a pause the clerk asked, "Does she have her own towel?"" - Tina M. Digiovanna
unknown
Report5points
#140
"Some people just aren't happy unless they have something to complain about. I stayed in a beautiful hotel right on the beach in California -- an idyllic spot, you would think. But while I was waiting to check out, I heard the manager ask another guest, "Did you enjoy your stay?" "Not really," the man said grimly. "I'm sorry to hear that," the manager apologized. "What was the problem?" "The surf was too loud."" - Daniel Vargas
unknown
Report5points
