83 Of The Most Shockingly Dumb Things People Have Ever Heard

So the interaction started interesting: my 18 year old employee was asking about Polish traditions that got handed down in my family. I replied that my Polish great grandfather married an Austrian and everything got mixed and diluted.

“Austria? You mean Australia?”

“No, Austria. It’s a country in Europe where they speak German. Where Arnold Schwarzenegger is from -“

“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?”

(Mind you, there’s also a customer standing 10 feet away who is now cracking up).

Boss starts listing off movies…Terminator, Kindergarten Cop, Jingle all the Way, nothing rings a bell. So he googles a picture and the first thing that pops up is the Mr. Olympia picture.

“Oh, so it’s because that’s what she used to look like?” (Pointing to me, I did a Bikini competition 10 years ago).

So in short, she didn’t kow Austria was a country, thought Arnold Schwarzenegger was something offensive and her takeaway was something about bodybuilding. The boss now asks all new hires if they know who Arnold Schwarzenegger is.

A coworker a couple of weeks ago…

“I’m sick of this country (united states). I don’t belong here. I’m going to move to Alaska”.

I recently moved into a new neighborhood. Out of the dozen houses with pets around, only one family leaves their dog out to bark at every leaf that blows by. One day, I saw the owners outside and went to introduce myself, and just see if they could do something about the barking aimed directly at my bedroom windows starting at 6 AM. After a bit of a chat, the guy said "I'm surprised to hear the barking bugs people. I've had neighbors tell me that they appreciate it, because "It keeps the neighborhood honest"". In my head, all I could hear was David Rose saying "That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard". Yea man, people prefer your dog's constant barking over the usual peace and quiet.

When I was in the Army I know someone who got charged with polygamy because he thought getting married in one state cancelled out getting married in another. So he turned the paperwork directly into HQ so his new wife could start getting the benefits. He didn't tell his peers because he was afraid of getting made fun of, which he was alot when he was on extra duty and because he was a horrible human being.

>My uncle told me the reason California has so many gays is because during the gold rush the men spent so much time down in the mines they turned gay.

Someone actually said that to me in Arizona.

>Is New Mexico a state or a country?

My uncle has a PhD and told me that in 2016.

>You know how black holes don't conduct electricity, and how rubber doesn't conduct electricity? Could black holes be made out of rubber?

Some dude heard my classmates and I discussing our physics classes (physics majors) and decided to bounce his theory off of us.

>You're studying physics, right? I had this crazy dream and I was hoping you could tell me what it meant.

An old high school friend confused physics with psychics.

That women have heartburn during pregnancy because the baby’s hairs get caught in their esophagus.

Freshman college government class, a girl actually said that people chose homelessness because "if they didn't want to be homeless they could just get jobs".

Or there's the woman who thought London was a country and Rome was the capital of France.

ETA: or the girl in my high school who insisted that ALL religions are based on Christianity and that it's the oldest religion, so obviously Christianity is the only correct religion.

"I don't worry about the price of gas going up, it doesn't affect me because I only ever put $20 in at a time".

Girl in high school with me once asked “Is Barack Obama the President of the United States OR America?”

I’ll never forget the look on the teacher’s face.

Trees make the wind. When they move their leaves, it starts to blow.

I know someone who claims that emissions from cars, planes, and other polluting sources are GOOD for the environment. Something about how plants need as much carbon dioxide as possible to make the world greener.

From what I found out later, this was based partly on an actual study, but only if you read only half of it and ignore the other half (i.e. the "yes, BUT..." half of the research results).

This claim has also been exploited by oil and gas companies to justify their actions.

My ex thought that everything had a 50% probability of happening because it either happened or it didn’t happen. This person was in charge of company financials.

My mother had 2 girls after having an ovary removed and had a boy 10 years before. Someone commented 'They must have removed the boy ovary!' LOl that's not how biology works.

After the fire at Notre Dame cathedral, a coworker said:

It's so sad to see millions of years of history just go up in flames like that...

A second coworker said:

You mean thousands... But you're right...

I just asked them why they thought the cathedral was built long before Christ was born.

Don't remember what prompted this comment from me, but I said jokingly to a young coworker:

"Im gonna get you a thesaurus for your birthday."

He said, very serious, "No please dont. I dont like dinosaurs at all. Im too old for that."

I think my brain exploded infinitely as he walked away.

Just last week a bloke at the market told me confidently that:

- The earth is flat
- Our atmosphere ends 73 miles up (edit: he also stated that the atmosphere was a solid dome)
- The sun is only 50 miles away 
- The Hiroshima [attack] wasn’t real 

His only source? The Bible, and “*they* say it but it doesn’t *sound* real”.

A girl I used to work with was on the phone and had to spell her last name. She said “P as in person, A as in apple, L as in elephant…” You could tell the person on the other end was confused because she started again. “P as in person, A as in Apple, L as in elephant…”.

I was working for a state service (MI) that helps unemployed folks with kids who are receiving state support to find new jobs. Most gave it appropriate effort, some just hung around to make sure the state kept the support coming. One day, prior to a seminar I was giving, one young lady announced to her friends, "You can't pick your baby's daddy!" It was all I could do to not jump in the middle of that group and scream, "Yes you can!" That was around 2001 and sticks in my brain to this day.

Lass I used to live with shouted me into the kitchen. When I got there she was looking out the window and said "there's a beautiful sunset this morning".

My ex girlfriend thought Michigan was one of the seven continents.