Medical Staff Still Crack Up After Remembering These 75 Wild Things Sedated Patients Blurted Out

Not an anesthesiologist, however when I had my hysterectomy I serenade the OR.
I always joke that I can sing the song "You say she's just a friend."

The resident I worked with at the time came to check on me in the evening and said just so know you didn't say anything strange in the OR. Oh okay.

The next morning my Doctor came in and he had one of those smiles on...and was giggling. He said girl you are funny. I said why? He said you were singing in tge OR I said no I wasn't...I said if I was what was it. And when he named that song I knew for sure I was.

Im still convinced I can sing that song.

Waking up from my heart surgery I apparently said "oh I'm still alive". They thought it was funny, but my wife thought it was even funnier when they told her cause she realized my d*****d brain was trying to sing Pearl Jam's Alive.

My mom on the table for her hysterectomy: "While you're in there, can you get my tonsils out?"

Surgery was delayed a few minutes while they OR recomposed itself.

When I woke up from my kidney stone removal I had hiccups from the anesthesia. The nurse said they'd pass in a minute or two, but I apparently decided to showcase my 'talent' for getting rid of hiccups...holding my breath. I kept trying to hold my breath and my wife kept telling me not to. I guess I had an "I'll show you" mentality about it and kept trying.

I had a kidney stone removed and first thing i told the nurse was I dont think im into sounding. She had to walk away for a bit cause she was laughing so hard, when she came back she said that was the funniest thing she has heard in the 12 years she had worked there.

Apparently the last thing I said to everyone before checking out was "good luck in there" with a big thumbs up to the doctors.

Me, being wheeled to the OR for elective surgery: "Hell yeah, let's go!"

Me, returning for emergency surgery & recognizing the anesthesiologist from last time: "Round 2, let's go!" after which I went in for a fist-bump. At least he didn't leave me hanging.

I've only had surgery three times. I apparently really took a liking to whomever my nurse was after the first surgery, because I was apparently *very* upset that the staff "cut the tape" keeping her around when I had my second surgery at a completely separate hospital. I refused to answer their questions until they let me see her (which was not possible, since she had never worked there).

I then proceeded to pull off my part of my bandages on the drive home and walk up and down the length of our motorhome because they had told me to move around if I got sore...and I was sore. My hater husband made me sit back down when all I wanted to do was follow directions.

A patient waking up singing “s*x b**b” by Tom jones and then asking me out on a date… I was flattered but declined and she then said “f*****g b******t, I’m moving back to America”.

I had a surgery scheduled to remove a fibroid on a snowy day and everything was way behind schedule. My surgery was delayed almost 3 hours and I was getting really impatient. My only memory after bring taken to the OR is asking the anesthesiologist if the surgeon was ever going to get things started. He laughed and told me we’d been having an awesome conversation for the past 5 minutes.

After I got my wisdom teeth out, apparently I begged to keep the 2 they pulled and they let me take them home in a ziploc. once the pain meds wore off I made my mom throw them out immediately.

I feel awful and regret for ever saying it, but when I woke up from major surgery I was worried about tornadoes hitting the hospital. what would they do and how would they hide the patients. and then I said >!"I'm like d***s. I'm worth a lot. Please protect me"!<

🫠.

I'm not an anesthesiologist but the last time I was put under, just before I conked out, I sat bolt upright and asked everyone if they were baking cookies because I smelled cookies baking. They laughed and said, 'no', and then I conked out.

I was a scrub tech student almost 20 years ago. Was scrubbing a podiatry case, podiatry being foot. The foot being at the bottom of the body, podiatry gets put at the bottom of the food chain among surgeons. Apparently it’s a real hierarchy thing.

Anyway, this surgeon liked to use an RNFA to assist. Which for a relatively simple foot repair means I was basically window dressing. None the less, the surgeon and first assistant were fun to work with, informative, easy going, and I found the surgery fun as the anatomy of the foot isn’t something I got to see much of.

The surgery is so minor, they don’t put the patient fully under. They are put under twilight anesthesia meaning they are asleep enough to not be conscious but not asleep enough they stop breathing.

That’s the idea at least. I’m standing there, doing my best imitation of the animated end of a retractor when I get the feeling someone’s eyes are on me. My back is to anesthesia and the patient’s head, so I look over my shoulder and see the patient sitting bolt upright. I did a full cartoon double take.

I looked at the surgeon, and said “hey Dr. Surgeon, your patient is looking at me.”

The anesthesiologists magazine hits the floor and he starts to scramble. After a few frantic seconds the patient says “I don’t know what you guys are doing down there, but I know you’re doing a great job.” Then he collapsed right back to sleep and we resumed.

I took part of my lunch break to go see the patient. He had no memory of waking up, or even who I was. D***s are weird.

After my appendectomy I was very insistent about immediately getting up to go pee and refused a catheter.

The nurse was very distressed about this, and followed me into the bathroom, but did not successfully dissuade me from my mission.