“Demon Spawn”: 67 Times Rude Customers Pushed Employees Too Far And Instantly Regretted It

I once had a table complain to me that I said “Hi guys!” instead of “Hello sir. Hello madam.” This was in a 50s-style burger place and definitely not in some formal steakhouse kind of place. For context, I should also point out that at this place, every server was expected to vocalize some sort of greeting as guests arrived and some form of goodbye and thank you as they left. So what do all of my coworkers end up doing repeatedly and pointedly as this particular couple leaves? “Bye guys!” “Have a great day guys!” “Come back soon you guys!” etc. The husband was amused and laughed while the wife, the one who had complained to me, was less amused.

I’m not sure if it really counts (and it’s the only thing I can really think of off the top of my head) but I was working a busy Saturday night. I had a full 6 table section as well as a 6 top and a 4 top in two other sections so I was running around to say the very least. I had a needy table of four middle aged women, complained about their food and their drinks, they were loud and disruptive, just... basically awful.

When they finally left after two and a half hours, I realized that one of the women at the table had left her fancy umbrella.

I stayed very dry during our spring storms last week.

Being a French waitress in a French restaurant in London, I would sometimes pretend to be polite while the rudest customers would leave. They would think I was saying Goodbye Come Back Soon, instead I was smilingly saying Goodbye Never Come back, in French.

I haven't been a server for a long, long time, but I still remember the 4-top that came in during our Friday night bar rush (I worked graveyard and when the bars closed at 2:00, we always got a bunch of drunks in for their post-drinking food). The 2 women and 1 guy were decent, but the other guy kept poking me in my side when I'd pour coffee. I told him repeatedly that he was going to wear his coffee if he didn't stop. Then after a poke, I told him if he did it ONE MORE TIME, he'd be wearing it. Well, of course, he reached up and poked me that one last time. So I poured coffee in his lap. This was before the McDonald's hot coffee lawsuit, naturally. The two women always made sure to sit in my section after that. Without the poker.

It is unbelievably easy for me to waive things like late fees or contract fees. If a customer is nice, or at the very least, not abraisive, it will often get them out of paying extra. If you are rude to me I will not offer to waive anything.

I worked at a chain restaurant for awhile that has very popular free "unlimited" cheesy biscuits.

(People would really get their panties in a bunch over these biscuits. "Hi welcome to-" "TWO WATERS AND CHEESY BISCUITS QUICK")


Anyway when people would piss me off by being rude or complaining to get stuff for free; I would pick the old, hard biscuits from earlier even if there was a tray of fresh biscuits. And nice tables would get the best biscuits.

Family came in 10 minutes before we closed and said they'd eat quickly (haven't heard that before). An hour late I walk up to their table with the smelliest garbage can I can find and ask if I can get anything out of their way. They left after giving me disgusted looks.

I used to work in a store that had a "seniors day" where anyone over 55 got 10% off. We didn't have to check IDs or anything. If I had anyone who was rude and obviously under 55, I would end off the transaction with "and because it's seniors day, you get 10% off!" And watch them cringe.

This girl asked for some hotsauce with her sandwich. It wasn't clear which kind she wanted so I said, "Sure! Would you like buffalo sauce or something more like tabasco or sriracha..?" And she IN THE SNOTTIEST AND MOST CONDESCENDING VOICE replied, "Um, tabasco. Duh." As she rolled her eyes and laughed to her friends.

So I went into the back and poured our super hot ghost pepper sauce into the little tabasco bottle and brought it out to her. She coated her entire sandwich with it.

I watched as she took a singular bite of her sandwich. I brought her a box at the end of their meal.

When I worked in a catering hall, I would crop dust while passing through tables with a big smile on my face before swiftly exiting before the smell reached their nostrils.

I work in a paint store. For some reason it is a misconception that we are also interior decorators... Often we get middle aged ladies coming in with large pieces of furniture and demanding we find them colours that coordinate with it. Most of these ladies are horribly rude and pissy when I explain that I can give them my opinion but I suggest they hire a interior decorator if they want a professional. That's when I intentionally sell them on [messed] up colours. "This puke green is a the perfect blend of warm undertones and soft overtones for this chunk of couch you've brought in. As a feature colour I suggest this soft purple. It compliments the green perfectly and will add character to your living room."

When you get a rude person on take out.

Take the paper wrapped straw, hold it in your fist with your thumb on the top of it, then jam it onto the counter. It will crack the straw on the inside. When they take the first few sips it will be fine, but when the liquid gets below the crack they can't suck anymore. By that time they are long past it being worth it to turn around. Then what you are going to call and complain for a hole in your straw? Yes…petty.

I shake their beer as I’m bagging it, especially the ones that are clearly road sodas.

ETA: I work at a liquor store, former server though!

Having a conversation on your phone and ignoring me? I'm going to ask you every single question imaginable as loudly as I can. Do you want paper or plastic? Single or double bagged? How many items do you want in each bag? How will you be paying? Do you want us to load your groceries in your cart? I hope the rest of your day is as pleasant as you are.

22 years ago when I worked at Steak n Shake I would do things like pack cups with ice before filling them, smash their burgers with my thumbs while assembling them. When they would complain about "not enough extra ....." I would triple the size of the sandwich with whatever it was...usually pickles.

As much as a customer would motivate me to actually [mess] (meaning making it not safe to eat) with their food, I never did. Though I did say the line occasionally "Are you sure you want me to make/serve you food after speaking to me like that?".

I also like pretending to not know about certain booze or dishes they ask for that are off menu. Especially if they repeatedly ask for off menu things.

"Let me go check with the bartender/chef!" Take care of other tables for 5 minutes. Come back.

Me: "Sorry we dont have that"

Guest: "Well do you have x?"

Me: "Let me go check!"

Guest: "No wait ----"

Me: already gone.

Not a server, but I witnessed the simplest form of revenge today and I think y’all will appreciate it. I’m at the post office. This she beast in front of me is just the absolute rudest to the poor postal worker for no reason. She came in with an attitude and threw the letter at him. “I need some kind of proof this makes it out of here.” It was very clearly just a letter in an envelope. She could have gone with certified mail. She could have gone with first class shipping. I ship various things for my business so I’m aware of pricing. The postal worker tells her, “It will cost $9.45 for proof of shipping.” He shipped it one day priority. She angrily paid it, didn’t question it and left. That’s what you get for being a jerk.

I only have so much mental bandwidth while I’m bartending, so I purposely keep my eyes down while making drinks until I have enough memory open for the next order.

But inevitably, guests approach the bar and (whether or not they’re up next) state their bar order at me. But since I’m not looking at them and it’s usually loud enough for plausible deniability, I just pretend I was too in-the-zone to hear.

(I absolutely hear every one of them.)

And then when it’s their turn, I look up with my most genuine, hospitable smile, and I ask, “What can I get for you?”.

Working in a call center, we will often be overly nice and cheerful to unhappy callers. They either turn it around, or if they are genuinely rude, it annoys the [hell] out of them and they can't claim that we were rude.

It truly is the small things.

My first job ever was at La Madeline when I was 15. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the restaurant, it's a chain of spruced up cafeteria style French food...quiches, soups, salads, sandwiches, roast chicken, and LOTS of baked goods. The worst I ever did was give full fat caesar dressing to snooty ladies who asked for low fat or the full fat tomato soup instead of the low fat version.

A few years later, in my barista days, I learned about barista's revenge. If you were a [jerk] to us at the register then you automatically got decaf. The catch was if a [jerk] ordered decaf then I still gave them decaf. I was not willing to potentially risk someone's health because I was annoyed they were rude.