This gift guide is for the one family member who contributes absolutely nothing to the household finances, sheds on every available surface, and still acts like they own the place. That's right, the pet. They have no concept of capitalism or the Gregorian calendar, and they would be infinitely more thrilled with the box than the gift that comes inside it.
But that is not the point. The point is that they are the true main character of the household, and the ritual of spoiling them is a sacred, non-negotiable tradition. We have found the gifts that are worthy of their magnificent, and deeply judgmental, presence.
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#1 A Motion Detection Cat Laser Will Give Your Cat The One Thing It Has Always Wanted: A Tiny, Elusive, And Deeply Frustrating Red Dot To Chase, All Without You Having To Lift A Finger
Review: "We bought this toy to try and wear out our new kitten and keep him from getting bored and attacking our old cat. What we did not expect was the new kitten AND the dog playing together with the fun red dot!!! It tires them BOTH out and we have peace in our house again!" - Bethanystar
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#2 A Paw Print Ornament Kit Will Allow You To Immortalize Your Pet's Adorable, Slightly Judgmental Paw Print On Your Christmas Tree For All Eternity
Promising review: "This kit is great and includes everything you need, so you don't have to look for any rolling pins or anything! The clay is air-drying. No mixing or baking needed. So that part is awesome. It wasn't messy at all! I also read some other kits that stick to the paw. This clay doesn't stick at all, which made my dogs so happy! The consistency is more like a moldable plastic or super-light feeling Play Doh. The BEST thing about this kit is that I could put names on the ornament with the stencil! I have a few dogs, so without it, it would just be a blur of paws." — Nellie
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#3 A "Gingerbread" Cardboard Cat Scratcher House , For Your Feline Friend Who Wants To Celebrate The Holidays The Same Way They Celebrate Everything Else, By Scratching Up A Storm
Promising review: "We buy houses like this for our cats whenever they come out around the holidays. The cats love sitting in them and scratching them to pieces. Most cardboard houses fly apart in no time. These were a little pricier than what we usually get, but they were also well-constructed. For cardboard, I don't think you could get much more durable. The cats love it." — Ccolo
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#4 Or A Set Of Plaid Matching Pup-And-Parent Pajamas , Because The Time Has Finally Arrived For You To Take The Cutest Holiday Photo Ever
Promising review: "Love love love!!! These pajamas feel like super-soft fleece but are NOT so thick that you overheat easily. The dog size XL fits both of our big labs (one 75 lbs., the other a super tall but skinny 61 lb.). Made for the cutest Christmas card photo! Definitely recommend!" — Alyssa
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#5 A Festive Plaid Collar Will Make Your Pet Look Less Like A Freeloader Who Lives In Your House And More Like A Distinguished, Holiday-Ready Member Of The Family Who Is Just Waiting For Their Sherry And A Nice, Long Nap
Review: "These are really thick and well made. Cute pattern. Thick enough that they don’t look super skinny on my big dogs and actually do a good job reining them in on a walk. Not sure how the large gold accents will hold up but they are cute for the price! (Dogs pictured is 130 lbs and and 100 lbs. bought both XL size." - Amazon Customer
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#6 A Catnip Station Will Turn Your Regular, Boring Cat Into A Tiny, Blissed-Out, And Slightly Unhinged Hippie Who Just Wants To Roll Around And Contemplate The Meaning Of Life
Review: "My cat is a pretty picky girl. She has very few toys she likes & very rarely has any interest in catnip. I saw the reviews on this & decided to try it out. I couldn’t even get it on the wall before she started trying to rub on it! She’s been sitting in front of it for 10 minutes now since I put it up. I think it’s safe to say she’s a happy girl & definitely approves of this toy!" - Christy C.
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#7 This Outdoor Cat Enclosure Is A Purr-Fect Way To Bring The Outdoors In, Giving Your Cat A Safe And Secure Space To Explore And Enjoy The Fresh Air, While Keeping Them Protected From The Elements And Potential Hazards
Review: "My cats love it! Good quality and easy to modify. I used 3 sides and put against the exterior wall so cats have access to kitchen window. They go out day and night to watch activity in the back yard." - Lisa C.
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#8 A Mini-Tree Toy For Small Birds Who Would Put "All I Want For Christmas Is You" On Repeat
Promising review: "A lot of the time, our birdies get pretty shy when you put a new toy in the cage. Not this time! Our blue boy Skye was playing with this tree right away. He loves climbing, hanging on the side of the tree, playing with the little baubles hanging off the side, and especially exploring the star with his beak. Such a cute Christmas tree! We started out just wanting to put something festive in the cage, and it's turning into their favorite toy." — J. Starns
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Let's call this what it really is: a tribute. A glorious, slightly unhinged offering to the tiny, furry god who lives in your house rent-free. Your cat is not going to send a thank you card. Your dog will not post a glowing review on social media. This is a one-way transaction of pure, unadulterated devotion. Every item on this list is a physical manifestation of your love, a silent apology for that one time you were five minutes late with their dinner.
#9 A Plush Bottle Of Champagne For Toasting The New Year
Promising review: "This has become my dog's new favorite, and is durable and is just fun. Everyone who has seen it in my dog's mouth laughs and then asks where we bought it. They want to have it." — MoGreen
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#10 This Suncatcher With Customizable Name Is A Bright And Beautiful Way To Bring Your Pet's Unique Spirit To Life
Review: "It is exactly as shown but even more beautiful in the light! The perfect size and weight. It was a gift given to a friend and she absolutely loved it! Would definitely recommend!" - Caitlin Hillman
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#11 A Dog Treat Puzzle Will Give Your Dog The One Thing It Has Always Wanted: A Job, A Purpose, And A Delicious, Meaty Reward For A Hard Day's Work
Review: "Great dog puzzle. My little one (dog) has a love and hate for it. Loves it cause she gets snacks, hates it cause she has to work for it. Simple gets the job done. Overall great purchase!" - Denise
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#12 The Tiny, Adorable Apex Predator Living In Your House Can Now Hone Its Hunting Skills On Something Other Than Your Unsuspecting Ankles With This Fluttering Interactive Cat Toy
Review: "I have 9 cats and constantly buying new and innovative toys for them. This is by far the best yet. They have not stopped playing with it for 3 hrs and because it goes in circles they each get a turn to bat at and catch the butterfly. That many paws and claws and it’s holding up great and it came with a second butterfly for when the 1st one gets worn out. It doesn’t even have to be on to catch their attention and play with it. I will definitely buy a 2nd one." - ShopAholic
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#13 These Festive Doggie Pjs Are A Fur-Tastic Fashion Statement For Your Furry Friend
Promising review: "Love these snowman PJs for my 4-year-old, 21-pound Cavalier King Charles Spaniel! I ordered her a size large and they are a perfect fit! The fabric has a nice stretch to it, so these pajamas easy to put on and take off. She can move about comfortably and carries on as if she’s not wearing anything but the fur on her back! These PJs are made of a nice, soft material which is lightweight. The stitching is secure, so I think they will wash up nicely, but I will hang dry to prevent any shrinkage, just to be safe. My kiddos get such joy from seeing our sweet fur baby wearing pajamas! — Patricia
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#14 This Felt Dog Treat Advent Calendar Is A Dog-Gone Delightful Way To Treat Your Furry Friend To 24 Days Of Yummy Snacks And Surprises, With A Soft And Cuddly Felt Design That's Perfect For The Holiday Season
Promising review: "This is adorable! I made homemade dog biscuits and was able to tuck two into each pocket for our two rescue dogs. By the third day, they figured it out and would stand in front of the calendar and wait for their treats." — C.S. Wells
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#15 A Giant Tennis Ball For Dogs Is The One Toy That Will Finally Make Your Dog Feel Like A Powerful Giant In A World Of Regular-Sized, Boring Tennis Balls
Review: "This doesn't last but my dog plays with it even though she has punctured the ball. We have purchased a replacement ball about every 3 months and for the price, our dog gets many of hours of entertainment." - K. Burklund
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#16 Your Pet Can Now Immortalize Their Signature Without The Subsequent Chaos Of An Ink-Related Disaster Thanks To The Inkless Paw Print Kit
Review: "Really loved things that paw print kit. User friendly, but if your pet is squirmy, you may need to try it a few times. Nice keepsake to have or even frame. There was enough ink for my 4 cats and 2 dogs. For the price, this purchase was definitely worth buying." - Destiny Almanzan
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The beautiful thing about shopping for your pet is that there are no wrong answers, only more opportunities for them to be a glorious little weirdo. They might ignore the state-of-the-art, motion-activated laser and become completely obsessed with the crinkly paper it was wrapped in. And that's okay. You're buying a front-row ticket to the most chaotic, unpredictable, and ultimately heartwarming show on earth: your pet's brain. Now, on to the next act.
#17 A Photo Ornament That Celebrates Your Little Puppy, Kitten, Bunny, Chinchilla, Or Any Other Furry Loved One's First Holiday
Promising review: "Love this ornament! Bought one in 2017 and again in 2018. Perfect weight, great picture size (I used wallet size photo, cut to fit). Good price for a wonderful memory to enjoy year after year!" — Logan'smama
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#18 This Purr Pillow Soothing Kitty Toy Is A Comforting Companion For Your Feline Friend
Review: "My kitty cat loves it. She snuggles and pretend nurse. So cute. Durable. Battery lasts about 3 months or so with constant daily use." - WID
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#19 A Bag Of Gootoe Turkey Tendon Treats Will Convince Your Dog That You Are, In Fact, The Greatest, Most Brilliant, And Most Generous Human Who Has Ever Lived
Review: "These treats come in a medium and a large size and I’ve written this review to show both, you can see the size difference in the final picture. Aside from that the review of the treats is the same for both sizes." - Christopher M Bloomer
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#20 A Guinee Pig Backpack Is A Glorious, Portable Palace That Will Allow Your Tiny, Potato-Shaped Friend To Experience The World In A Way That Is Both Safe And Deeply, Deeply Confusing For Everyone Who Sees It
Review: "My guinea pig Chester loves to go on adventures with me inside this safe cozy backpack. And is not afraid. Love this item!❤️" - Meredith Bowers
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