We’ve Heard Of Toxic Masculinity, But Here Are 64 Examples Of Toxic Femininity That Are Just As Real

Casual misandry is definitely a trait of toxic femininity, the same way misogyny is a trait of toxic masculinity.

"I'm not like other girls."

My boss: “You wouldn’t be a good teacher, since you’ve never had kids.”

I quit, went on to get a Master’s degree in educational leadership, and am now faculty/instructional designer.

Still don’t have kids.

I teach history and independent study as an adjunct.

Men are parents, guardians, or other caretakers, and their children are with them as part of daily life.

Women often don't understand this, and assume that the man is either a [offender], divorced, or 'on special duty'.

I would say that toxic feminity can be quite similar to toxic masculinity. I'd describe it as those women who yell at men when they get emotional or vulnerable, telling them to 'man up' or 'you're supposed to be the man in this relationship!'. Kind of the same thing that 'traditional men' would say.

It pisses me off because it's bringing women down (saying they are weaker than men) while also being really hard on the men and not letting them express themselves.

Also, as you say, all that stuff about having to have children to be 'real women'.

A more light-hearted example of, if not toxic, at least mildly annyoing feminity would be those women who force their husbands/boyfriends to wear a tie that matches their dress to weddings etc. (We have to match, honey!!)

I'm a woman myself, if it helps.

Oh God. Them getting in your face and hitting on you very aggressively. Had it happen before, eventually her friends had to drag her away from me, after I walked away. Mam, this a bar and I came here with my BOYFRIEND. I'm gay, please stop.

I've been around plenty of women who are all YAASSSS QUEEEEEN about other girls, but then behind their backs say some of the nastiest about them to anyone who will listen.

A subset I call the “Call Her Daddy” type. It’s tenets are basically, as long as you’re hot you can be as crazy, toxic, messy, and mean as you want, and you should use other people (especially men) as much as possible to achieve your ends.

If anyone doesn’t like the way you are, that’s a personal failing on their part and just proves the idea that “my beauty attracts haters” so I must be doing something right! They will say they hate men and don’t like them while also admitting that everything they do is explicitly for male attention and validation.

I’ve met a few of this type and I can tell you right now if they weren’t conventionally attractive, no group of people would ever put up with it.

Skewed social responsibilities.

Women expecting men to assume traditional gender roles of the provider while simultaneously thinking it's abhorrent that some men prefer the traditional gender role for women being SAHM, home makers, etc.

Doesn't get much worse than that.

Using your children as a means of offense in divorce proceedings.

I've seen men destroyed by being denied access to their children.

As a woman:

1. **Big [manhood]/ being tall:** It's okay to shame men over their bodies but not women.
2. **Calling every woman with her own mind and opinion a "pick me"** : Need I say more?
3. Calling every guy a creep even when he isn't being a creep, and you just don't like him.
4. Saying you want your SO to open up about his feelings, but when he does you end up using it against him in arguments or after you break up
5. Hitting men and thinking it's fine because you're a woman and he's a man
6. "male tears" "Is it a girl or an abortion?"
7. ALL men
8. Gossiping in front of the people you're gossiping about and being obvious about it.
9. Passive-aggressiveness at work or school. The amount of hurt I have seen women inflect on other women is disgusting! And it's also insidious, because you can't describe it as easily as you would if someone hit you or was just aggressive in other ways.
10. Thinking men are otherworldly so they must not have feelings or anything. It's okay to call them ugly etc as if they weren't a human being just like you. (see the hypocrite that is Billie Ellish and her comments about ugly men, while simultaneously not wanting people to body shame her, and being celebrated as some sort of body positive hero.
11. Thinking that anyone who criticizes feminism is anti-equality, a "pick me," or an incel.

When women are discouraged from achieving things or displaying intelligence because it's not "feminine." Or they're told men will be intimidated by it.

My partner used to slouch on purpose because being tall made her feel not feminine (she's about 5'8) and she stopped playing netball because it gave her muscle which also made her feel less feminine. She's better with it now and agrees the idea of being feminine can be toxic.

My least favorite is that real women have curves.

I often get scrutinized for not wearing makeup. I have nothing against it, I just feel more like myself without it. I put myself together, I just don't spend a ton of time styling my hair specifically or dabbling in cosmetics and for some reason that's taboo.

Maybe it’s a Japan thing (raising my family here), but Japanese women tend to almost take pride in not fixing tech stuff. From printers to smartphones to flipping fuses, they tend to have the attitude of, “Fixing that stuff is why we keep guys around.”

My wife has this attitude, even though she’s amazingly smart and capable, and my daughter is picking it up as well. Can’t stand it.

Prioritizing "girl power" over actual competence. I've worked for women who know their [stuff], and are easily respectable and trustworthy..... then there's the raging narcissistic thundercunts that need to throw their weight around, just so you know that they're in charge. They make bad decisions then pat themselves on the back for breaking through the glass ceiling, when it's obvious to everybody that they are just a walking Napoleon complex.

The way that a majority of female managers treat their female staff.

Thinking they’re entitled to special treatment if they happen to be attractive.

Being called inherently lazy for not doing makeup/nails/high heels/or some complicated hair do. No judgement on women whom like to do those things. Whatever makes you happy. But I’d rather focus on other things.