"It's The Most Miserable Marriage I've Ever Seen": 30 Stories Of People Dating And Marrying Rich

ok, not me, but a close friend from the middle-east.

so he comes from a middle-class background with lower-class roots, and is pretty smart in a well-rounded way. he's pretty handsome, well-read, articulate, polite, emotionally intelligent...etc. the kinda guy who almost always makes the good decision, but is limited in potential due to a lack of connections and wealth.

so anyway, his uncle works for this really rich and established family who are looking for someone to marry their only daughter, the only problem is that this family, although really blessed financially, didn't win the genetic lottery, so to speak. in fact, one could say that they're kinda cursed... they carry a fatal genetic defect that causes a rare form of muscular degeneracy, one that has decimated their family in the last two generations.

so my friend proposes anyway (the girl is charming, and is quite intelligent to boot), and the father had given rather unsubtle hints that good things would come to him if they were to get married, and he wasn't lying. the couple get married and move into a really big house that was sold to him by the father for a no-money down, pay-when-you-can loan. he gives him a great, very well-paying job in his company and even gifts him a new car.

so my friend, being the intelligent, ambitious, and promising individual that he is, moves up the ranks quickly, is given another loan by the dad to start a small business on the side, and in a few years has already bought a couple of properties for himself.

now all this time, they're getting closer together as a couple. really closer, he's gone from seeing this relationship as one of mutual convenience to real love and respect. he appreciates all the doors that marrying her has opened, and she appreciates the risks that he took in terms of marrying someone who might die early and pass on the disease to their progeny. a few years later, they have a wonderful baby girl who shows no signs of the disease. but sadly, within five years or so of their marriage, the wife -who already had signs of the disease- starts to get really sick, and over the next couple of years, she deteriorates to the point where she's either in hospitals or bed-ridden.

she died last year of complications, her heart literally gave out a few days after their eleventh anniversary. so here he is, raising a seven year-old daughter, and absolutely heart-broken. he had become so deeply in love with his wife that losing her completely shattered him.

although he's rich as hell now, and will become much, much more so when her parents die, because the dad put him and the grand-daughter as the heirs to the family wealth, he's still suffering. and even though i'm sure the pain will lessen with time, and he'll eventually get remarried, he's kind of an emotional mess right now.

so a few months ago, i invited him to come hang out with me for a while in Bali, i figured the island atmosphere would help soothe his mind a bit, give him some perspective, or at least a reprieve from the emotional grind. so we're sitting on this empty beach at sundown, with a bottle of mccallan and the thin remnants of waves lapping at our toe's.

i let him spill it all out, just train of thought type storytelling, about the good days and the bad days and everything in between. and in the end, he tells me that it was worth it all, not for the money, but for the chance to be with her for that short while.

Kinda... my wife was not rich, her Dad was, she/we inherited a substantial amount.

First 15 years of our relationship I didn’t believe her Dad had money. He never showed it. Pleasant surprise to say the least.

I grew up pretty poor and to be honest I never realized just how different life was with money. It’s a different existence.

I dated someone super wealthy and yeah, I definitely earned every penny. The dude was an emotional train wreck. I realized I could provide more for myself single and broke in terms of happiness and quality of life then with him.

I'm pretty sure my husband married me for my money. I was 29 and feeling lonely. We were both science nerds. He was a doctor's son, but he was really not financially supported. I was a bar owner's daughter and far wealthier than he, although the money was parceled out to me in fairly small amounts but it supported us. Although I appeared to be the stay at home do nothing housewife to many I am sure, it was really my money supporting us and our three children. He did work but he had a serious debt creation problem with credit cards so his salary was never enough. When we turned 50 he met another woman, told me "She's rich!" And abandoned me to basically poverty and food stamps. Lovely right?

Fast forward two years, I tookmy half of his retirement account which was about 70k, and invested it and now I have close to a million. I'm shooting for 5 million. Oh yeah and now I don't have to "discover" yet another maxed out credit card in my name ever again.

Broke up with someone set to inherit over a billion from her father. Nice girl, no major issues but just didn’t feel like we clicked.

Some days I can’t help but think it was dumb when I’m looking at my very very average bank account and salary. It would have been a more extravagant life but I’m with someone who makes me happy so I tend not to regret it.

I didn’t, but my mother did about 15 years ago (after divorcing my father).

He keeps all of his wealth stashed away in an account that she can’t access. The house and cars are bought and paid for and the utility bills are also covered. She won’t ever have to worry about not having her basic needs met. But her disability check is “our money,” while his millions are “his money.” He gets legitimately upset about things like her buying organic eggs instead of regular, running the shower for thirty seconds while she grabs a towel from the other room, and going through the Taco Bell drive-thru because these things cost him his “hard-earned cash,” even though he’s actually inherited most of his money from his father and she usually uses her disability check for extras.

He emotionally abuses her every day, sometimes berating her until she cries and begs him to leave her alone. He insults her body and appearance. He hovers over her and harasses her while she eats. He picks apart and criticizes everything she says and does. According to what she’s told me, they haven’t had sex in years. I can remember exactly one time that I’ve seen him show any kind of affection toward her. I think he held her hand once while sitting on the couch sometime in 2005ish. Other than that, I’ve never seen him kiss or hug or even touch her. The worst part might be that I think she prefers it that way.

It is the most miserable, cold, lonely marriage I’ve ever seen. She is too dependent to leave. I know I would much rather die completely alone than married to someone like that.

Anyways, I unknowingly married into wealthy family. My wife's parents are millionaire next door types. There primary house is worth maybe 230k, but I had a feeling that something was going on because one time, when I was 23-24, they had found this lightly used Toyota Land Cruiser for sale in GA for some ridiculous amount of money, like 70k. I was going to GA for work the next week and they asked me to buy it and they'd pay me back when I got back with it. It literally did not register with them that a 23-24 year old probably doesn't have 70k in the bank. So, they sent me with a pre-signed check and told me to fill it out with the final price. I had been dating their daughter maybe 3 months at that time. About a year later, my father in law casually mentioned wanting a log cabin in the woods somewhere, preferably on the lake. I took it as if he were dreaming and said yeah, that would be really nice. That coming weekend, he and my mother in law put an offer in on a lake cabin with one of the best views I've ever seen in my life. I'd hate to know what they paid for that. I still didn't really understand what they did or didn't have until they made me executor of their estate. The vast majority of what they die with is going to charity and their church. Just wild.

Moral of the story. Looks can be deceiving and just because they have it, doesn't mean that you'll inherit it.

Yes, my wife’s parents are UHNW and co-founded a many billion market cap public tech company - although they sold most of their stock and retired twenty years ago so they aren’t billionaires.

My wife had the unique environment of being raised by people that had the humility and experience of being self made, but she also only experienced the financial stability of people who made their money long before she was born. I would say that this resulted in the positive emotional health of being raised in loving and stable family but she was mentally cognizant of the entrepreneur hardship that it takes to be successful and her parents would tell her about.

I didn’t know how much of an impact this would all have on my own career and life when we started dating, but we are very close to her family and spend a lot of time together. Nightly dinner conversations are on how to preserve and grow wealth through investments and tax avoidance. Moreover, they are active angel investors so entrepreneurial convos are commonplace. The transfer of knowledge that I have experienced is absolutely invaluable.

The flip side of this is some emotional stuff that you just have to overcome. I am very successful by all financial metrics, but I’m still a peasant compared to her parents. No one ever makes me feel that way and they celebrate my wins so enthusiastically, but my success doesn’t really move the needle of what my wife grew up with and her parents have. To a certain degree, my success is more like getting table stakes to be here rather than anything really special. This really can screw with your mind and distort your perception of yourself after working so hard and achieving so much by normal standards. However, you just have to be confident with yourself and recognize your value regardless.

The only other thing I’ll say is that managing generational wealth takes a lifetime of grooming to prepare for and is a full time job when the transition happens. It’s a major responsibility and takes a lot of personal development and knowledge to be successful with it. So people who think just marrying into a wealthy family and that it’s going to be a sweet party are sorely mistaken. It’s a big deal. Also, I don’t ever suggest anyone pursue a relationship for financial reasons. That will end very badly for everyone. Finding your true partner in life, no matter their background, will yield the best outcome and most financial success.

I was emotionally blackmailed by Mummy dearest into marrying into a super wealthy family. We ourselves were not wealthy at all.

Before marriage it was all stressful being the poor side of the marriage. After the marriage I learnt that the seriously wealthy sometimes had serious money problems. Very soon after marriage I had to learn a whole lot of stuff about how money works, and get into a few fights to make sure that the money remained with us. At least we are wealthy if not super wealthy now.

Now it’s quite nice, tbh I never realised while growing up how much better life is when you are rich. Like not just stuff but freedom.

He married me for my money i married him for his brains, life is a roller coaster but i still love my man.

My ex (who is now a good friend) is quite rich. We broke up for the reason I wouldn't move to Europe with him. It lasted 2 years until he decided to move and I wanted to stay here and refused to let him fly my broke student self to visit him all the time. Money was never a concern and I still don't care about his money. Now that we are friends, he probably spends more money on me because we go out for dinner or drinks when he is in town. I sometimes tease him about being rich but he doesn't flaunt it (drives an older VW golf, lives in a small apartment in a middle class area, doesn't wear flashy brand names, cooks, cleans and does almost everything for himself). Only thing "rich" thing he does is flying first class overseas because he hates not having extra leg room.

My best friend from childhood married a billionaires daughter. He's still depressed and still himself. He lives a nice life but it's not his money. His kids are set for life, he is still miserable and complains a lot... But what can you do he's a mate.

I didn’t marry him for his money, but he got pretty wealthy while I was with him.

We met in college. Dated for 4 years while we were both dirt poor(but his parents were very well off), and then got married. My degree seemed to be a busy, so my career wasn’t going anywhere. His took off after a couple of years and he moved up in salary fast over the years. I was with him a total of 11 years.

We decided we were financially stable enough to have a child after 5 years married. I had a spotty job history in customer service, so we lived on his growing salaries. While I was pregnant we met and made friends with a woman whom I became close to quickly. After a year I was venting to her one day about his spending habits and disclosed how much money he made. Looking back, I realize she didn’t seem to start getting closer to him until after that. He ended up leaving me for her less than a year later.

So I didn’t marry the guy for his money, but he was definitely changing during our decade together. The frivolous way he spent money and lived at the edge of his budget drive me nuts. We had no savings, he wouldn’t pay off any debt, and every time he got a raise he would spend it. I strongly believe he was squirreling money away somewhere because even being extremely generous, I couldn’t figure out how we were spending that much money every month like he said we were. I grew up dirt poor, so I have a very healthy respect for money and having a savings.

He’s married to his affair partner now. They had a kid and she’s a stay at home mom now. He was extremely manipulative to me and he’s very good at it. She’s manipulative, too, but much more transparent. We’ll see how long that lasts. I’ve lived that life with him and it sucks.

My cousin sister did it. She is really pretty and the guy is really rich.

Our family aren't so close that's why we had no idea about their financial situation. Their eldest brother and sister in law cut them off after their parents died. She was doing her Masters and was taking care of her 3 sisters. It just became too much for her and she agreed to marry the guy.

The guy had the longest crush on my cousin,he is very loving. Now that I am a Lil older and can have grown up talks, she shares about her feelings. She really respects her husband and is really grateful for taking care of her family.

I know a man who did this. Married the daughter in a wealthy family. She was a huge pain in everyone's ass. Spent money like it was water and had no idea of it's value or use. Unpleasant to everyone as none of them were important other than her parents I guess - the source of the funds.

Spoiled the kids, caused them to develop unearned attitudes. It was hard to watch.

Ended in divorce. He got a payout from the family, but I don't think it was worth it.

I kinda, sorta did. Not in the true sense of the word, since I earn well, have my own career, and am aligned with him on financial goals.

But money is cited in the top 3 reasons for divorce. I worked hard to have 0 debt, even in grad school, and lived in ways that ensured financial stability. Like living with roommates even when I didn't "need to," not traveling unless I could pay cash, not getting pets until I was solidly settled. My husband views money the same way - simply, I would NOT have married him if he had debt or mindsets about money that I don't mesh with.

Don't get me wrong, I love the guy. A lot. But... lasting marriages need more than love. And I know a couple that is NOT aligned about money, she has tons of debt and an exorbitant lifestyle, and he is frugal, and it creates rifts and tension and ill-aligned expectations in so many facets of their lives. It's not just money - it's food and travel and hobbies and pets and kids and friends and education, and money touches all these things. So to not marry, at least a little bit, "for" money, or with money in mind is a terrible idea

My mom did this. She had at me 19, didn’t know English. White American man asked her to marry him so she did, he HAD money. He’s 16 years older than her, he’s now broke, a terrible person overall and she’s miserable. He also cheated on her two years ago which was shocking to know that his d**k still works at his age.

One of my mom's friends was like this. She met a very rich guy in new york, married him, was taken care of for a few years, and then about 5 years into the marriage began to insist that they move to Boston. She eventually got her way, they changed their residency and she divorced him. In Massachusetts (at the time, it may have changed since then) a marriage of at least 5 years guaranteed the wife 50% of the husband's estate (if there was no pre-nup). In New York, she would have had to wait 10 years. This was a blatantly strategic marriage and while I don't agree with her actions, I don't think she has any regrets about putting in ~5 years of work for several million dollars.

I actually have a very close friend. Her last "relationship" was based on the fact that he got a LOT of money and so paid for her food, oil for the car, rent for the flat they moved in together, pretty much everything as far as I know. When they got to know each other she (my friend) wasn't interested in him at all, but after he confessed his feelings for her and she found out about his income, she suddenly found herself very much interested. The problem was: the money could only make her happy for so long, and after 2 years she broke up with him. As far as I can see their relationship was always a rocky one because she didn't really like him or his personality, she also wasn't really attracted to him physically.

Funnily enough, even after she should have realised that such kind of relationship wasn't for her, her current "boyfriend" is once again her boyfriend because of money. She was in a tight spot, having messed up uni application. Her mom more or less kicked her out, and she asked him to stay at his flat for a few days. Well, turns out it's a really big and nice one, and even though she never showed any interest in him (she actually often said that his advances towards her were annoying, and less flattering things about his looks), after he confessed his feelings she started something with him and now again has some kind of "sugar daddy" who pays for her everything.

I don't really agree with what she does, because I think I could never sleep with someone I am not attracted to, regardless of money. But at least those two guys kind of fell into her lap and she didn't actively seek them out or something like that. I expect her to break up with him after maybe one or two years when the money can no longer mask his looks and personality which she dislikes.

This one hits me deep. I dated a girl for 6 years. I was days away from proposing when a friend of mine who know of my plan, told me he saw her cheat on me more than once. With one of our other friends. When the truth came out, there was obviously a lot of turmoil but she begged for forgiveness, promised it would never ever happen again, and part of me believed her because we really were in love. I just couldn't shake it though. Couldn't sleep. It was like a rock in my shoe. "once a cheater always a cheater" never left my brain. I ended up dumping her and moving on. I married a middle-class girl from a farm, blue-collar dad. I was also raised in a lower-middle blue-collar family.

The girl I dumped was the heiress of a large company, which she sold after we broke up and netted ~$100M. She married a guy and they now have three homes, range rovers, a ferrari, you name it. Still friends with her on FB. I think about it a lot.

I have no doubt I am much happier now with a faithful wife and four beautiful children. But god damn that ferrari looks like fun.

I managed to get myself in a $250k+ job by age 30 and have given my stay-at-home-mom wife and 4 children a wonderful little life, but a far cry from the 1%.

The end.