Many companies proclaim that equality in the workplace is important to them. However, practice doesn’t always match theory. And fancy words and promises don’t always result in the right actions.
Even though discrimination based on someone’s family status is illegal in many places (though completely fine in others), some managers still give preferential treatment to those employees who have children. One mom, who goes by the name KwestTurkey on Mumsnet, called out this practice, despite being a parent herself. She said that it is was completely unfair to prioritize parents’ requests for time off and that everyone should be treated on a ‘first come, first served’ basis. Her post started a discussion and got people debating this topic.
Bored Panda reached out to financial expert Sam Dogen, the founder of the Financial Samurai blog, to chat about what to do if we feel discriminated against in the workplace and how we ought to convince ourselves to take a break from everything over Christmas. Scroll down for his insights about how employees have quite an advantage right now if they're seeking to change their jobs.
#61
Yabu
If you are a lone parent without a support network and there is no childcare physically available as it's all shut Christmas day what do you suggest?
And before you say it people's circumstances change after they've had children.
The same argument would also apply to carers. Anyone with young kids/disabled/elderly dependants should take priority over someone with no caring responsibilities at those times of the year when it could be impossible to find an alternative.
Willyoujustbequiet
Report3points
#62
If I didn't have children I would never book time off in school holidays. The prices are ridiculous especally in England! Personally I would let parents have the summer/easter etc but Xmas is slightly different as most people want that off.
Bellie710
Report3points
#63
Where is all this paid childcare over Christmas? My sons school and nursery are both shut, do your children’s nursery’s stay open over Christmas?
I work in a school so thankfully doesn’t apply to me. But my husband worked nearly every Xmas day before we had kids so that none of his colleagues missed out on Christmas with their children. This was including the year when he lived away and he ended up having dinner with his bosses family.
I work in a school so thankfully doesn’t apply to me. But my husband worked nearly every Xmas day before we had kids so that none of his colleagues missed out on Christmas with their children. This was including the year when he lived away and he ended up having dinner with his bosses family.
Now we have kids and thankfully his colleagues are doing the same for him. I wouldn’t be so bothered about teenagers but ages 0-10 you really don’t want to miss.
The summer is surely a childcare issue, the amount of threads I’ve seen of people desperately looking for play schemes etc for their kids. It’s not that easy to just pay for it and every time the suggestion is to use your holiday. Seems very privileged to say “use childcare not holiday”
I don’t think parents are to blame in this but the school.childcare set up is still aimed at families with a stay at home parent so not fit for purpose nowadays.
Spottybotty20
Report2points
#64
I don't think it should be an actual rule that parents get preferential treatment but on the whole I'd hope most people were flexible. I'm not taking time off this Xmas to let others in my team with kids have the whole week off. When I was a child I liked to have my parents around over Xmas. If I had something on then fair enough a bit of flexibility both ways but I don't want to stand in the way of a family Christmas to watch re runs of Jingle all the Way every day
Dasher789
Report2points
#65
Parents should absolutely not get preferential treatment. Time off during popular holiday periods should be discussed with the whole team beforehand. I canvassed my team about Christmas to see what everyone was wanted before holiday requests were put in. If there had been clashes, I would have tried to spread things as evenly as I could.
For general holiday requests, I treat them as first come first served. In the event that someone wanted to book off a week that was already booked out, I'd be willing to have a conversation with the people involved to see if anyone is in a position to be flexible and expect my team members to be considerate to each other, but if that's the time they want off, and it's already approved, I wouldn't try to force the issue.
A person being a parent would not come into it. They get flexibility if they need unexpected time off in the form of dependant leave, but having a child is their choice and other people are not responsible for them.
If you want the holiday, book it in before someone else does.
For general holiday requests, I treat them as first come first served. In the event that someone wanted to book off a week that was already booked out, I'd be willing to have a conversation with the people involved to see if anyone is in a position to be flexible and expect my team members to be considerate to each other, but if that's the time they want off, and it's already approved, I wouldn't try to force the issue.
A person being a parent would not come into it. They get flexibility if they need unexpected time off in the form of dependant leave, but having a child is their choice and other people are not responsible for them.
If you want the holiday, book it in before someone else does.
2points
#66
Easy greed. Pay the people that are covering those days more. Okay this is an union idea so it must naturally just US slapping again
2points
#67
I am an actual fully grown adult female mammal. It is literally in my DNA (and that of all females of every species ) to reproduce.. it's a thing called 'biology'
Yes there are people who choose to buck biological functions.. that is the beauty of 'higher functioning' mammals...but in the main. We reproduce. If we didn't there would be no more pensions, and we (the childless by choice ) would have no one to support us and we would need to be working until we die in our late 80s ...
I think it is the least we can do -
To support the people who have kids ..
They support me..
To support the people who have kids ..
They support me..
Finknottlesnewt
Report1point
#68
Yes, it should be first come first served with no preference for parents. Having said that, the healthcare provider I work for closes over Christmas, usually from 21st-22nd December to 3rd-4th January. We do not provide urgent care so there is no need for us to provide any appointments over the Christmas period.
1point
#69
If you have kids you are stuck with paying over the odds and competing with all other parents for time off during the holidays. As for organising in advance, depends where you work. Some companies don't allow you to book more than 6 months ahead.
So it depends on the circumstances and the job. You simply can't make a sweeping statement like the OP did. When I was single, I didn't mind parents booking time off over Christmas whilst I worked. My plans were flexible.
When I was a parent, I knew that guilt of having to be there for every Christmas play, every school performance, every special assembly, every Christmas Day. Juggling all that with work was a nightmare and you did rely sometimes on the goodwill of colleagues - that you would pay them back for.
Everyone has an opinion on this and everyone will have a story, which goes to show that there is no right or wrong answer. Be kind, be understanding and try to put yourself in their shoes before you judge.
0points
#70
Geez....cmon guys. Kids are little for such a short time and all of us should be sympathetic to the problems working parents have to balance.
I'm unable to understand the sour grapes surrounding being flexible for parents.
I had my child when I was 38 so spent 15 years in the working world always volunteering to work holidays. After I had my daughter we celebrated holidays on my off days. But when she hit school etc she was very aware of Christmas day and I insisted on having the days off when they were crucial for her.
But being flexible and kind to our fellow humans are important for our own well being.
Resentment always damages ourselves.
Just my two cents.
Recognizing there are always selfish manipulative people who get a thrill each time they get their own way by lying and gaming the system.
When I'm around those kind I send a prayer of thankfulness that I am not living in their skin. I can't imagine them in their home. They are exactly the kind of people who thought rush Limbaugh was funny.
I'm unable to understand the sour grapes surrounding being flexible for parents.
I had my child when I was 38 so spent 15 years in the working world always volunteering to work holidays. After I had my daughter we celebrated holidays on my off days. But when she hit school etc she was very aware of Christmas day and I insisted on having the days off when they were crucial for her.
But being flexible and kind to our fellow humans are important for our own well being.
Resentment always damages ourselves.
Just my two cents.
Recognizing there are always selfish manipulative people who get a thrill each time they get their own way by lying and gaming the system.
When I'm around those kind I send a prayer of thankfulness that I am not living in their skin. I can't imagine them in their home. They are exactly the kind of people who thought rush Limbaugh was funny.
-4points
