Telling little white lies to your child every now and then is certainly not a bad thing. In some cases, namely, that of Santa Clause and the Tooth Fairy, bending the truth can inspire a sense of wonder in a kid's mind - and keep them on their best behavior if they know presents under the tree are at stake. Other times, these little lies are simply the only way to get stubborn, critical young minds to move in the right direction.
Using "alternative facts" in raising kids, however, can occasionally misfire. If your young detective catches you in a lie, you're in hot water. "Kids globalize and say, ‘My parent is a liar. Are they also lying about loving me?’" Canadian parenting expert Alyson Schafer told The Washington Post in 2015. On the importance of owning up to your funny lies, and making up for it, though, she added that “making a mistake gracefully is a really important parenting skill.”
In other words, as long as you make sure to backtrack and let them know that eating watermelon seeds won't actually turn them into a watermelon before they make it to high school, you're in the clear. A heartfelt apology and an ice cream cone also never hurt anyone.
Check out some of the most clever and funny things to say to your kids below, and if you still need more inspiration, you can find our previous post on this here. Also, don't forget to add yours to the list!
#261
When I was five, I heard someone mention "Elvis sightings." I asked my father what Elvis was. "Elvis is an alien from outer space," he said.
I was in my 20s before I discovered this was joke.
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#262
# 65 was once true. # 249. Toothpaste will bleach your shirt. Some brands.
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#263
My son was 8 before he knew that football games on school nights had a second half. I always sent him to bed at halftime.
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#264
The paper boy would pick up the papers, cross the road, stand under a shady tree and roll up the newspapers with a thick red rubber band. He always dropped a few. I told my daughter that it was red rubber band tree and those were ripe ones that fell off. She believed it for a long long time.
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#265
My parents told me drop bears would come out at night and attack you if you went near trees. For years I was terrified of going outside at night.
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#266
When I was between five and eight my dad always woke me up in the morning and I detested waking up for school. He would always say that a bear was knocking on our door and that it was asking for me. When I looked at the door panes gingerly there was none but I was told that it had just left after waiting for me.
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#267
To get my daughter to sleep in her toddler bed, I told her that grown up beds were only for people who were done growing. If she wants to get big and strong like mommy and daddy, she has to sleep in her toddler bed because it has magical powers that make her bigger when she sleeps...
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#268
When my brother and I were around 2 or 3 years old, my mom's youngest brother (still in school and living at home) told us that raisins were dead flies with the wings and legs pulled off so that my grandparents would buy a cereal other than Raisin Bran (at the time our favorite snack).
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#269
When my kids would see a commercial for a fast food place they would immediately want to go, so I would pretend to call the place, and then tell my kids the place was closed. My son said one time "They are never open!"
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#270
When we went to the store my mom used to tell, "Every time I touch something a kitten dies"
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#273
One time years ago when our son was about four or five he had a little toy screwdriver and was going around telling people he was going to "screw them"
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#274
I asked my dad why he won't eat vegetables, he said that old people's stomach will furtilized them and it eventually grows bigger like a tree on top of his head. It freaks me out...
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#275
Babies are the gifts from Allah for the wedding. But if Allah sends the gift before wedding, it's a curse. Ammu (mother) still says this to my nephew. LOL
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#276
once we were in the park and we
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#277
This is very tips on lying to kids specially for parents for many reasons when kids are very young. Sometimes parents need to lie to their kids in a lot of occasions which is too many to mention. I would like to suggest those parents too for lying to kids in necessary times. Thank you so much for sharing such post that has really awakened me and I am a sincerely blogger who shares tips on Blogging can be read here http://www.easybloggingtip.com/
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#278
When I was in kindergarten, our little bathroom in the classroom had a noisy exhaust fan. One night, I had a dream that I was in that bathroom, and the fan was strong enough to suck my long hair into it. For at least 5-7 years after that, I was terrified of going into any public restroom that had an exhaust fan in it. Not a lie, per se...but that really f*cked me up for a long time. To this day (I'm now 47), I still don't like loud fans but they obviously don't hinder me in using restrooms!
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#279
When my elder sister was 3 she was told the tree is moving because she didn't ate food. When I was 3 years I was told the same and I said "Moma, it is moving because of wind"
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#280
When a mean boy pulled my hair in kindergarden my Mom said it's because he liked me. Since then I consider meanness the sign of fondness. :(
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