“I Lost So Much Respect For Him”: 50 People Share The Reason They Didn’t Marry Their Partner

When she was very jealous about her cat liking me. How tf we supposed to have kids if she’s jealous about me and her cat being friends. Lol miss that little feline and I know she misses me too.

When he cheated on me then chastised me the following morning for “still going on about that”.

The way he talked about our future life together. He pictured me like a woman "without too much ambition" so that i could clean the house and raise his kids. And when he said something along the lines of "we're gonna sign a prenup just so that I am safe" lol dude you drive a 1992 FIAT, you rent a flat with your mom and sister in the worst neighborhood and you're between jobs, there's literally nothing you have that i might want in a divorce settlement, get over yourself.

She talked about everything like it was hers. Her tv. Her apartment. Her couch. Her cats. Never ours when speaking to anyone, even me.

He offered to buy me a laptop from a guy on Facebook Marketplace (I was a broke student and he was well-off), which I thought was so nice and generous, but when we went to pick it up he relentlessly bullied, manipulated and gaslit the guy into bringing the price down by $200.

I lost so much respect for him that day. And it was all downhill from there.

When she asked her friend to flirt with me to test me.

He forgot to tell me he was in a relationship.

Valuable information.

I paid for us to go away on holiday for her birthday, travel, accomodation, most food and all planned activities were covered and I got her an expensive gift on top. She paid for one activity which I hadn't planned for and was a spur of the moment thing.

Towards the end of the holiday I was running out of money, I asked if she would mind if we paid for ourselves for this last activity, I didn't expect her to pay for me. She flatly refused on the basis that she'd paid for the impromptu activity. No discussion, no query just a flat no.

I couldn't help but see her differently after that, and I realised that any future we had would reflect this reality of me paying for the majority of our relationship despite her earning more than I did. We didn't last more than another year after that.

My ex always had a subtle way of making me feel like I was never enough. I was always chasing his affection, which was never guaranteed. Eventually I remember realizing that a lifetime of that excruciating chase would be hell. That in fact, he doesn’t actually love me—he loves an idea of me.

During a weekend trip that I had practically fully funded, I realized that I did not have my card when fueling. When I asked her to pay, she said what am I, a bank?

There were so many moments that should've been it.

Tracking my location.

Accusing me of cheating then trying to gaslight me into believing I actually had.

The number of times he screamed over me.

How he got off on pushing me around in public.

But it actually took a physical assault and his arrest for me to realize I couldn't spend my life like that.

When he told me he expected me to stop working when we got married. He also refused upfront to “let me” go to law school. I said it wasn’t up to him, he voiced concern about paying back school debt. I said me working after I went to law school would pay back my loans.

Basically he wanted to control all the money, be able to cheat on me but also track my comings and goings (as he’d hold the financial strings).

I noped right out of there. He made A LOT of money back then and has gotten even richer but … who cares? He was a d**k. He was controlling,
manipulative, jealous and petty. No regrets. I can’t be bought. The irony was when I dumped him he claimed I was a gold digger. lol, sure buddy.

Then he went and married a gold digger who puts up with his s**t. I know this bc mutual friends confirmed it for me. 🙄.

When we'd agree to put an argument to rest under the assumption it had been resolved, but then days/weeks later he would bring it up again out of no where or bring it up as ammo in a new argument we were having.

Long story short I was always the enemy, and anything I said in my defence was seen as a lie or used against me, and a wife is not an enemy.

When I accidentally got pregnant while dating him & he acted like an a*****e. I considered keeping the baby & didn’t want to have an abortion. He was so mean for no reason & spent the night out then I found some random woman’s shirt in his car. I got an abortion (I did not have the ability to give a child a good life at the time there was no way I was doing it alone) & never looked back. 2+ years after leaving him he still tried to contact me through my friends & changing his phone number.

He ended up getting in big trouble a couple of years ago with the FBI for working with a doctor doing insurance fraud he was paying patients part of insurance money to get unneeded surgeries, lab tests, etc. they would keep everything else. One of the patients ended up dying & I think more died after the fact. It was a terrible thing & im so glad I found out he was a terrible person before that happened.

Strangely enough, it wasn’t when he said, “I don’t know if I’ll *ever* be ready to marry you.”

It was when I brought up him saying that at a later time and he said, “I never said that!”.

When she slept with my best friend.

He couldn’t handle any serious conversation. Every time I brought up the future, he’d just joke around or change the subject. It made me realize he wasn’t in it for the long haul.

When she told me that I was being "selfish" for wanting to go to the gym and work out.

And no, it wasn't because of anything specific on a particular day that was more pressing at that moment. It was just in general; me wanting to do something for my own health instead of just devoting every second of my free time to her was "selfish.".

He and his friends forgot about me and left the bar while I was still in the bathroom.

He would prioritise other people before me.

He would say the right things and knew how to apologise but his actions didn’t reflect his words.

He hid some of his habits from me…

He was not financially responsible.

Our sex life was bad.

I was not making him happy either.