Will we ever get bored with The Office? No! Will there ever be too many articles about it? Probably not! And let's not forget the countless The Office memes that keep the show's humor alive.
Have we ever dedicated a post solely to Michael Scott’s quotes? Not yet, but we are about to fix that blunder with this collection of his most ingenious quotes! All one hundred and thirty-three of them to make you relive perhaps the best moments of the series.
So, what do we know about Michael Gary Scott? Born in 1965, he’s about to turn fifty-seven this year on March 15th (mark it on your calendar!). So, just a couple of years younger than the legendary comedian who portrayed him in the series, Steve Carell.
We also know that Gary had a pretty lonely childhood and never attended college, having lost all his tuition money in a pyramid scheme. Also, all he ever wanted was friends, and that’s why he chose the life of a salesman, ultimately landing a job as the Scranton branch manager at Dunder Mifflin.
And, you definitely know the rest - he’s the most unorthodox boss with the weirdest sense of humor and a very inappropriate understanding of social norms. So, basically, one of the most fantastic comedy characters ever created.
Okay, but let’s go back to Michael Scott’s quotes - from ‘How the turntables’ to various threats to Toby; you will definitely find all of his brilliant thoughts here. Some of these quotes you might know by heart, while other wise words of Michael’s might’ve gone under your radar before. But, no worries, as this is precisely the purpose of this article - to give you a chance to memorize all of Michael’s funny quotes!
So, put on your ‘fun jeans,’ scroll down just one Angela, and check out the hilarious quotes for yourself! Vote for the best quotes that are the epitome of Michael Scott to you, and don’t forget to share this cheerful article with your office coworkers!
#21 Flaws? Just the usual chaos
“Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me.”
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#22 Voice Wins Over Eyes Every Time
“Well, it’s love at first sight. Actually, it was… no, it was when I heard her voice. It was love at first see with my ears.”
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#23 Awkward Birthday Vibes
“Well, happy birthday, Jesus. Sorry that your party’s so lame.”
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#24 Close Enough, Right?
“...They say when you find true love, you know within the first 24 hours. With Carol, I knew within the first 24 minutes of the second day I met her.“
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#25 Boss Moves, But Make It Real
“The most sacred thing I do is care and provide for my workers, my family. I give them money. I give them food. Not directly, but through the money.”
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#26 Brain officially on vacation
“When I discovered YouTube, I didn’t work for five days.”
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#27 Collars? I Don’t See ‘Em
“Now, you may look around and see two groups here. White-collar, blue-collar. But I don’t see it that way. And you know why not? Because I am collar-blind.”
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#28 When “Good Summer” Takes a Dark Turn
“I had a great summer. I got West Nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. And I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected. Even though I peed on it.”
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#29 Guess Boundaries Don’t Apply, Got It
“You cheated on me? When I specifically asked you not to?”
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#30 Only real friends roast like this
“Friends joke with one another. ‘Hey, you’re poor.’ ‘Hey, your mama’s dead.’ That’s what friends do.”
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#31 Toothpaste sprinter energy
“It takes you thirty seconds to brush your teeth? Wow, that’s ten times as long as it takes me.”
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#32 Let’s Get The Labels Right
“Is there something besides ‘Mexican’ you prefer to be called? Something less offensive?”
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#33 Burn Victim Energy, Not the Sympathy
“I don’t want any special treatment, Pam. I just want you to treat me like you would some family member who’s undergone some sort of serious physical trauma. I don’t think that’s too much to ask?”- Michael after accidentally burning his foot while grilling bacon on his George Foreman Grill.
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#34 Fun Uncle > Dad Energy, Always
“It’s not that children make me uncomfortable, it’s just that, why be a dad when you can be a fun uncle? I’ve never heard of anyone rebelling against their fun uncle.“
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#35 100 Kids, Zero FOMO
“I wanna be married and have 100 kids so I can have 100 friends and no one can say ‘no’ to being my friend.”
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#36 That’s some next-level mind games
“Reverse psychology is an awesome tool. I don’t know if you guys know about it, but, basically, you make someone think the opposite of what you believe. And that tricks them into doing something stupid. Works like a charm.”
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#37 The International Michael Experience
“I am Michael, and I am part English, Irish, German, and Scottish… sort of a virtual United Nations.”
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#38 Cake over chaos, always
“They say that your wedding day goes by in such a flash that you’re lucky if you even get a piece of your own cake. I say that’s crazy. I say let them eat cake. Margaret Thatcher said that about marriage. Smart broad.”
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#39 This One Hit Different
“My philosophy is, basically this. And this is something that I live by. And I always have. And I always will. Don’t, ever, for any reason, do anything, to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what, no matter where, or who you are with, or, or where you are going, or, or where you’ve been. Ever. For any reason. Whatsoever.”
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#40 Fake it ‘til the oak kicks in
“That has sort of an oak-y afterbirth.”— After a sip of wine during the notorious “Dinner Party” episode, Michael attempts to be a wine connoisseur with this remark.
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