"Women Are Cats In Disguise": 64 Men Share What They Learned About Women After Living With One

Heading out on quick notice is now impossible. I always need to factor in the time to 'get ready'. For me it is always a 30 second affair of putting on my shirt and trousers, shoes.

Constantly asking where i'm going whenever i get up. Even if it is to the kitchen or bathroom. I also realized that if they ask you what you're thinking about, it means they love you.
Having a dream and being mad at me for what i did in her dream.

Sleeping next to them is like sleeping next to a thermonuclear weapon.

Six extra pillows, none of which are used to rest a head on, on the bed.

Literally every inch of real estate in the bathroom: Countertops, hooks, rods, shelves, soap niches, shower caddies, etc….

It all belongs to them now.

I didn’t realise how important candles were.

75% of the laundry is various small black stretchy things that cannot be folded

There are apparently serious, logical reasons why each one of the 17 moisturisers has a place and purpose in the bathroom

Even though I can clean a bathroom I don’t do it right

Girls can and are exactly as gross as boys.

Shampoo bottle graveyard in the corner of the shower.


Wet bars and p*****s hanging on lines strung anywhere in the bathroom (Discovered when you walk face first into them one night when you get out of bed to go to the bathroom)


Mysterious small plastic bags full of wrird food items like chciken feet or black seaweed or tree ear in the fridge. (Wife is Chinese)


Bedroom wardobe that we are supposed to share "50/50" over time becoming 80/20. (80% hers, 20% mine).

Shoe hoarders are REAL.

Never had a GF that didn’t take up most of my allotted storage space in both the bathroom and the bedroom closet.

They are extremely slow shoppers.

There are creams, tonics, cleansers, toners, oils, gels - you name it - for every part of the face and body.

Those hair pin things...... Everywhere.

The bathroom is now a beauty lab, not a bathroom.

How much time they spend talking to you about people you barely know. This applies to daughters too.

How she farts. The breaking of the ice f**t is also different from girl to girl. One of my exes got excited, then just stopped, looked at me, lifted her leg, and then let out a monstrous roaring f**t. She then giggled and ran off.

Another girl I dated, she ate a lot of protein as she was super fit, and she would just f**t over and over and laugh.

Then another girl I dated, she was the silent type, she’d sneak one on you and you would smell it but no hear it. Dangerous.

The fixation with cushions on bed - no one sees the bed and as a male I don’t care / I just want a decent pillow or two.

She’s either buying stuff or scrolling through stuff she wants to buy next. It’s like a full-time job, but with online carts and wishlists.

When I've been sat on the sofa with women while watching TV (this has happened with my ex wife and two separate girlfriends after we split) if they were the ones using the remote to put something on, instead of putting the remote down on the coffee table in front of them they would give me the remote, and then I'd be the one to put it down on the coffee table. I have no idea why, I'm not a big believer in the whole men are like this and women are like that, but it's happened with enough women at this point that it's something I've noticed as a woman thing.

Tell you she’s getting food or a sweet treat but will get mad if you don’t also indulge in said food or sweet treat.