At this point, the number combination of 20 and 20, aka 2020, the year the world went nuts, is a joke in itself. And quite a good one. But in case you were out and about on Elon Musk’s SpaceX and haven’t enjoyed all the tragi(comedic) fun that has been going on for the past… since January 1st, we invite you to sit back for an open mic.
We hand-picked the funniest jokes from the r/jokes subreddit that has been getting 500 or more puns, one-liners, and witticisms every day from its 18.9M members. It’s like an online comedy cellar on its own that has been helping people to “Get Your Funny On!” since it was launched in 2008.
This year, however, has been particularly fruitful for r/jokes. I mean, do ya seriously need an explanation why?
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#1
My Tinder bio says that I have a corner office with views of the entire city, drive a $500,000 vehicle, and that I'm paid to travel. My dates never seem too happy when I tell them I'm a bus driver.
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#2
The president of the US is threatening to send the military to suppress US citizens. Looks like Americans are finally gonna get a taste of democracy and freedom.
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#3
My wife left me because I am insecure No wait, she's back. She just went to get coffee
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#4
Last night my girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed… 2 minutes later she told me all the charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.
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#5
Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the order 4 5 6 1 2 3? In charge of the sequence, Yoda was.
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#6
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”. Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
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#7
America seems to have successfully prevented a second wave of corona By keeping the first one going
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#8
Steve Jobs would have made a better president than Donald Trump... But that’s comparing apples to oranges.
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#9
A priest, an imam and a rabbit walk into a blood bank The rabbit says : I think I might be a type O.
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#10
If "womb" is pronounced "woom", "tomb" is pronounced "toom" then shouldn't "bomb" be pronounced "BOOM" I hope that blew your minds
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#11
I just discovered that the word "nothing" is a palindrome... Backwards it spells "gnihton", which also means nothing.
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#13
They told me i wouldn’t be good at poetry because i’m dyslexic But so far I’ve made 3 jugs and a vase and they are lovely.
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#14
Do you want to know why the republicans won't impeach Trump? Because they believe in carrying a baby to full term.
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#15
Dude 1: Hey, bro?
Dude 2: Yeah bro?
Dude 1: Can you pass me that pamphlet?
Dude 2: Brochure
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#16
My wife just completed a 40 week body building program this morning It's a girl and weighs 7lbs 12 oz
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#17
Today I was invited by a female janitor to smoke some weed at her apartment, but i politley declined. I can’t deal with high maintenance women.
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#18
My friend gets really upset when I call him a flat-Earther He says the correct term is bulldozer operator.
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#19
My roommate says our house is haunted I've been living here for 300 years and i havnt noticed [c**p]
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#20
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
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