I’m not going to write a long description, but I will say that my dad is a master of dad jokes and puns. Having gotten my sense of humor from him, I would love to get some new jokes as well as share some with the rest of you. It can be as cringe-worthy as you want; the cornier, the better! Feel free to make one up, too, if that’s something you’re good at. Have fun!
#21
When people discover I'm a bad electrician, they're shocked.
8points
#22
I went to the doctor because I drank invisible ink. She still hasn't seen me.
8points
#23
How does the Pink Panther handle pesky picnic insects?
"Dead ant, dead ant, dead antdeadantdeadant,"(and so on...)
"Dead ant, dead ant, dead antdeadantdeadant,"(and so on...)
7points
#24
I never believed orthopedic shoes worked. I now stand corrected.
7points
#25
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
‘Cos he was outstanding in his field
‘Cos he was outstanding in his field
7points
#26
Slightly offensive joke incoming...
Q: How do you think the unthinkable?
A: With an itheburg.
7points
#27
How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile? You see one later and one in a while.
6points
#28
Norway started putting barcode on their ships so they can scandinavian
6points
#29
Why are spread sheets so weak?
They have all them cells, but no mitchondria
5points
#30
Why did the Toilet paper roll down the Hill? To get to the Bottom
5points
#31
Dad Jokes
What do you call a cow with two legs: lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs: ground beef.
Why are cows so dramatic: because they’re milking it.
What do you call a cow with two legs: lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs: ground beef.
Why are cows so dramatic: because they’re milking it.
5points
#32
What type of pants do the Super Mario Brothers wear?
Denim. Denim. Denim.
4points
#33
This morning, I coughed up a rook, knight, and a p**n. I think it's a chess cold.
4points
#34
I used to think this one was SO funny, and Idk why...
why was 6 afraid of 7
because 7 ate 9
I remember giggling for 12 hours straight because of this joke when i was 6 or 7. I thought it was hilarious.
why was 6 afraid of 7
because 7 ate 9
I remember giggling for 12 hours straight because of this joke when i was 6 or 7. I thought it was hilarious.
4points
#35
If you see a very drunk person hanging on a lamppost, how can you tell that he is a Freudian Psychologist?
He is singing the old Victorian love song "I want a girl, just like the girl, that married dear old dad."
3points
#36
Do you know what Mt. Saint Helen's looked like before they carved it?
They say its beauty was un-president-ed (unprecedented).
They say its beauty was un-president-ed (unprecedented).
3points
#37
What do you call a fish wearing a bow tie?
Sofishticated
Sofishticated
In the event of a fire, what steps should you take?
Really big ones
Really big ones
3points
#38
Did you know that Diarrohea is hereditary?
It runs in your jeans
It runs in your jeans
3points
#39
Actually said by my dad-
Me: So, are you good at PowerPoint? 'Cause I need help.
Dad: I can say that I EXCEL at it.
Me: Was that a microsoft joke?
Dad: Word.
Dad: I can say that I EXCEL at it.
Me: Was that a microsoft joke?
Dad: Word.
I'm fairly sure he watches too many shorts.
3points
#40
son: dad... im gay....
mom: fred... don't. you. dar-
dad: HI gay im dad!
mom: fred... don't. you. dar-
dad: HI gay im dad!
3points