It’s hard to believe it’s been almost 15 years since the legendary comedian George Carlin passed away. His wit remains a vivid memory thanks to the many “Best Of George Carlin” videos on YouTube that also give younger generations the opportunity to know him. When it comes to comedy, there is no shortage of great performers, but his bold stance on nearly every topic, from religion to politics, set him apart from other funnymen of his era. His irreverent jokes and no-holds-barred attitude made him a fan favorite but also landed him in trouble with the law more than once. He got into comedy in 1960 when he started working with Jack Burns, who soon became his writing partner and best friend. They performed together for some years before Carlin went solo. From there, he became a comedy icon, which continued up until his death in 2008 at the age of 71.
A leading voice that influenced other comedians and an important figure in both the counterculture and mainstream culture, George Carlin was noted for his black comedy as well as his thoughts on politics, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians, one of the first in the 1960s to use profanity in his routines.
He didn’t just make people laugh. He made them think and sometimes reconsider their beliefs. He had an uncanny ability to cut through the clutter of everyday life, and for this, we want to honor this man with our favorite inspirational quotes from George Carlin. Some are funny, some are insightful, but they’re all packed with his typical brutal honesty.
#21
“Some people see things that are and ask, ‘Why?’ Some people dream of things that never were and ask, ‘Why not?’ Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that.”
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#22
“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
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#23
“We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We’ve learned how to make a living but not a life. We’ve added years to life, not life to years.”
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#24
“When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. It will not be with jack-boots. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts.”
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#25
“Atheism is a non-prophet organization.”
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#26
“If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.”
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#27
“If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn’t the whole airplane made out of that stuff?”
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#28
“I often warn people: ‘Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, ‘There is no ‘I’ in team.’ What you should tell them is, ‘Maybe not. But there is an ‘I’ in independence, individuality, and integrity.”
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#29
“Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.”
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#30
“May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.”
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#31
“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.”
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#32
“If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?”
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#33
“‘Meow’ means ‘woof’ in cat.”
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#34
“The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.”
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#35
“I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”
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#36
“When you’re born into this world, you’re given a ticket to the freak show. If you’re born in America you get a front row seat.”
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#37
“I think people should be allowed to do what they want. We haven’t tried that for a while. Maybe this time it’ll work.”
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#38
“Don’t give your money to the church. They should be giving their money to you.”
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#39
“There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. Why not Despair, Guilt, Rage, and Grief? It seems only right. ‘Tom, I’d like you to meet the girl of my dreams, Tragedy.’ These days, ‘Trajedi.'”
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#40
“Not only do I not know what’s going on, I wouldn’t know what to do about it if I did.”
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