These days, if you want to find out where your ancestors are from, you don’t need to dig through family records or spend hours in dusty archives. Thanks to modern DNA services, all you have to do is order a kit, swab your cheek, pop it in an envelope, and send it off to a lab. Before long, you’ll get a breakdown of your origins, whether that’s Ireland, Australia, or somewhere you never expected.
But many of these tests offer more than percentages. They can also match you with other people in the system who share your DNA, potentially linking you to relatives you’ve never met. And as convenient as that sounds, it can also bring some uncomfortable surprises—because once those connections appear, old stories don’t always hold up.
On Reddit, people who took DNA tests and discovered way more than they bargained for shared what they learned. Scroll down to read their stories and see just how wild it can get.
#21
I discovered that I have some of the highest known neanderthal DNA, more than 99% users and over 4% of my total DNA. 3 tests submitted and a flight provided to a university in Australia for a testing. Was cool at first, and then not.
It bothered my wife a bit at first thanks to watching a couple documentaries.
It bothered my wife a bit at first thanks to watching a couple documentaries.
21points
#22
Family wasn’t destroyed but my hopes for knowing my birth parents were.
Using the DNA testing I found my birth parents (confirmed by CPS documents) and reached out. They want nothing to do with me. I had always imagined some great meeting but now I just know it will never happen.
It hurts to know that they don’t want to know me more than not knowing anything.
sausageslinger11:
It could be shame from giving you up, or perhaps they are afraid to face you for fear of you being angry.
OP:
I think that she might not have told her new husband about me. The internet has told me a lot about her life which is almost worse because we are very similar. We are both teachers, love our dogs, and run marathons. I wish she knew I don’t want to [mess] with her life, just know her and say thank you.
godoftitsandsangria:
I recently found out I am adopted and am currently on the fence about doing a 23andMe test. I am so curious about my birth parents, but I'm scared they won't want to know anything about me. I kinda just wish I could be a fly on the wall and observe but not interact.
OP:
So my sister and brother are also adopted. My sister has a great relationship with her birth parents. My disappointment aside, 23 and me did reveal some super interesting things about my heritage that I didn’t know.
Using the DNA testing I found my birth parents (confirmed by CPS documents) and reached out. They want nothing to do with me. I had always imagined some great meeting but now I just know it will never happen.
It hurts to know that they don’t want to know me more than not knowing anything.
sausageslinger11:
It could be shame from giving you up, or perhaps they are afraid to face you for fear of you being angry.
OP:
I think that she might not have told her new husband about me. The internet has told me a lot about her life which is almost worse because we are very similar. We are both teachers, love our dogs, and run marathons. I wish she knew I don’t want to [mess] with her life, just know her and say thank you.
godoftitsandsangria:
I recently found out I am adopted and am currently on the fence about doing a 23andMe test. I am so curious about my birth parents, but I'm scared they won't want to know anything about me. I kinda just wish I could be a fly on the wall and observe but not interact.
OP:
So my sister and brother are also adopted. My sister has a great relationship with her birth parents. My disappointment aside, 23 and me did reveal some super interesting things about my heritage that I didn’t know.
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21points
#23
Husband's grandmother was going on and on about how her grandmother was 100% Cherokee Indian. My MIL and I never believed her. The test results come back with zero percent Native American, so she starts saying the whole thing is a huge scam. Honey, no. You’re white all the way.
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21points
#24
I just got off the phone with my newly found bio dad. My mom[passed away] in 1980, my dad in 2012. I logged Friday in to ancestrydna to get my results from their Black Friday sale. It said that this person in NC was my father, no doubt. Turns out it was my mom's boyfriend before my dad came along. I have no idea if anyone knew. My newly found father certainly didn’t.
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18points
#25
My mom found out she had an older sister that was given up for adoption, my grandmother hid the pregnancy and forged my grandfather's signature on the adoption papers. We'd already known that my grandmother was an awful person, but yeah this was above and beyond what we thought she was capable of.
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18points
#26
I guess I could pretend that I was shocked to find out my dad is not my biological father.
I didn't think he wasn't, but I knew there was a possibility considering my mom's... social habits. Turns out my father is my dad's best friend and the kid I played with as a toddler was my half-brother. Both are [gone], as is my mom, so my dad and I just don't acknowledge it and carry on as usual.
Lost-Occasion-7243:
The same thing happened to me on my 18th birthday, just my bio dad is still a mystery.
I didn't think he wasn't, but I knew there was a possibility considering my mom's... social habits. Turns out my father is my dad's best friend and the kid I played with as a toddler was my half-brother. Both are [gone], as is my mom, so my dad and I just don't acknowledge it and carry on as usual.
Lost-Occasion-7243:
The same thing happened to me on my 18th birthday, just my bio dad is still a mystery.
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18points
#27
Not me, but my great-aunt.
Growing up, her siblings joked that their neighbor was her real father because she looked different from them. That turned out to be true.
To add to that, her sister (my grandmother) had a son with the neighbor's son, so my great-aunt is my uncle's aunt on both sides.
Growing up, her siblings joked that their neighbor was her real father because she looked different from them. That turned out to be true.
To add to that, her sister (my grandmother) had a son with the neighbor's son, so my great-aunt is my uncle's aunt on both sides.
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18points
#28
My best friend found out a few years ago, in her late forties, that she has two half sisters from a different mother. Her sisters knew she existed, and even her first name, but didn’t know anything else about her. Her sisters are just like her. Same eyes, smile, and hair. Same shoe size. Same great sense of humor, deep compassion, and strong intellect. The physical resemblance is shocking enough, but it was hearing all three of them laugh in the exact same way that tripped me out the most.
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17points
#29
I found out I was a descendant of 41 skeletons found in a burial cave (the Lichtenstein Hole) in Germany dating back 2500 years. Apparently they were either Frisians or Visigoths. They found another descendant less than 5kms from the cave. The descendants of Cheddar Man in the UK have an even older lineage. Seems I always come second.
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17points
#30
I have a friend who found out his family-first, godly Christian grandfather had fathered four children outside his marriage with three different neighbors. The youngest child was born to a 17-year-old girl, the same year the grandpa [passed away].
And that's just the ones they know about so far.
And that's just the ones they know about so far.
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17points
#31
Didn't really destroy a family, but it did put a lot of things into perspective from my already [messed up] family. I'm ex-mormon, also gay, and excommunicated from my family for it, as they're a particular brand of crazy. The reason I did it is because before my family broke off into their little sect of racist, sexist weirdos and moved to the middle of nowhere in Wyoming, we were a pretty normal 50's mormon family from Las Vegas. I knew nothing from my dad's side, and little from my mom's, since she married into it.
I found a few cousins on my mom's side who are actually really lovely, normal people, some of who are mormon but still completely welcoming and adored the fact that they got a new cousin even with me being gay.
My dad's side, who we really wanted to find out about, I pinged a whole family of siblings from San Diego who are black. now, I know that doesn't seem too crazy, except that my dad's family, as best as I could figure out, broke off from the normal part of the LDS church because they changed their policy on letting POC take leadership roles within the community. Basically, grandpa was a racist piece of garbage.
Through talking to them, they told me their grandma got pregnant by a white boyfriend, and they had pictures of him, but he and his family left Nevada and their grandma was forced to move to California to live with relatives when she was a single mom and just lied about the baby's dad dying in Vietnam. The baby was their mom, and after seeing pictures, the baby's father was my oldest uncle. Baby's mom married when her daughter was ten, and she was adopted by her step-dad.
So yeah, it wasn't my grandfather's hatred of black people joining the church that got us into this mess, it was just his general racism.
I found a few cousins on my mom's side who are actually really lovely, normal people, some of who are mormon but still completely welcoming and adored the fact that they got a new cousin even with me being gay.
My dad's side, who we really wanted to find out about, I pinged a whole family of siblings from San Diego who are black. now, I know that doesn't seem too crazy, except that my dad's family, as best as I could figure out, broke off from the normal part of the LDS church because they changed their policy on letting POC take leadership roles within the community. Basically, grandpa was a racist piece of garbage.
Through talking to them, they told me their grandma got pregnant by a white boyfriend, and they had pictures of him, but he and his family left Nevada and their grandma was forced to move to California to live with relatives when she was a single mom and just lied about the baby's dad dying in Vietnam. The baby was their mom, and after seeing pictures, the baby's father was my oldest uncle. Baby's mom married when her daughter was ten, and she was adopted by her step-dad.
So yeah, it wasn't my grandfather's hatred of black people joining the church that got us into this mess, it was just his general racism.
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16points
#32
Not me, but a college buddy sent one in. Found out her dad wasn't her actual dad. But that was just the tip of that iceberg. Apparently her mother had been engaged to a guy when she cheated on him with a different guy and got pregnant. She tried to pass it off as being her fiance's kid but the timing didn't match up and he did some digging that lead to his fiance's lover. That blew up and he left her so she got married to the guy she cheated with.
Here's the kicker. She was pregnant with the fiance's kid, not the lover's kid. So when my friend called her dad and found all of this out plus telling him what she found out he apparently just laughed it off (chalked it up to karmic retribution) and said he'd break it to her mom, told her he still loves her, and made sure their holiday plans were still on.
Time goes by and the mother contacts the biological father (who has his own family) and he ends up driving down to see her. So she meets her real dad and they talk for a bit, but also strangers so they decided it was best to just pretend they weren't family but kept each others contact info.
Was quite to story to have unfold.
Here's the kicker. She was pregnant with the fiance's kid, not the lover's kid. So when my friend called her dad and found all of this out plus telling him what she found out he apparently just laughed it off (chalked it up to karmic retribution) and said he'd break it to her mom, told her he still loves her, and made sure their holiday plans were still on.
Time goes by and the mother contacts the biological father (who has his own family) and he ends up driving down to see her. So she meets her real dad and they talk for a bit, but also strangers so they decided it was best to just pretend they weren't family but kept each others contact info.
Was quite to story to have unfold.
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16points
#33
Found out I had an aunt on my dad’s side who was given up cause she was conceived during an affair. Her adoptive parents lived in the same town, and she went to school with my dad but didn’t know he was her half brother. She was also in my mom’s friend group, so that when I saw her and asked my mom if she knew her she was like, yeah, I’ll call her right now...
It was wild. My grandma denies it all too….
It was wild. My grandma denies it all too….
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16points
#34
My grandpa passed away from Alzheimer’s, so my family uploaded our raw DNA to another site to see if any of us have the same genes that make it likely for any of the rest of us to have it as well. Luckily most of us didn’t have the gene my grandpa had, but my uncles have it. So while my immediate family knows we’ve got average chances, my poor uncles are probably dreading the future.
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15points
#35
I'm 25 and I've told this story a couple times in r/adopted.
In September I found my birth mother. We talked and she invited the man I thought was my birth father to dinner and my older brother who was from the same parents and we were adopted by the same family and grew up together came too.
We had a great time and we all clicked immediately. The man who I thought was my birth father was amazing and my birth mother and I liked so many of the same things. We made plans to see shows and I was finally going to meet her mother my grandmother and learn about the heritage I never had.
Then the 23 and me test came back that I took right before finding her came back. I found my uncle. Originally I thought it was her brother but it wast it was my birth father's brother. But my birth father wasn't the man I met. My brother and I were only half-siblings. Which there is still some tension between us.
My birth mother went ballistic for me finding out. She called me every name in the book saying i was ruining everyone's lives and how it was my fault this happened. It came out she knew all along I wasn't the birth father's kid. Everyone stopped talking to her and was pissed.
Except for my actual birth father's wife. Turns out they were friends from high school. My birth mother has been texting and calling her constantly telling her how it's all my fault and telling her I'm an awful person and to not let my birth father talk to me.
Through all this stress I don't really know if I want my birth father in my life.
The funny thing is my brother's birth father the man who I thought I was has been the most amazing man in all of this and is the only person in this invited to my wedding and i can't wait to have him there.
In September I found my birth mother. We talked and she invited the man I thought was my birth father to dinner and my older brother who was from the same parents and we were adopted by the same family and grew up together came too.
We had a great time and we all clicked immediately. The man who I thought was my birth father was amazing and my birth mother and I liked so many of the same things. We made plans to see shows and I was finally going to meet her mother my grandmother and learn about the heritage I never had.
Then the 23 and me test came back that I took right before finding her came back. I found my uncle. Originally I thought it was her brother but it wast it was my birth father's brother. But my birth father wasn't the man I met. My brother and I were only half-siblings. Which there is still some tension between us.
My birth mother went ballistic for me finding out. She called me every name in the book saying i was ruining everyone's lives and how it was my fault this happened. It came out she knew all along I wasn't the birth father's kid. Everyone stopped talking to her and was pissed.
Except for my actual birth father's wife. Turns out they were friends from high school. My birth mother has been texting and calling her constantly telling her how it's all my fault and telling her I'm an awful person and to not let my birth father talk to me.
Through all this stress I don't really know if I want my birth father in my life.
The funny thing is my brother's birth father the man who I thought I was has been the most amazing man in all of this and is the only person in this invited to my wedding and i can't wait to have him there.
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15points
#36
AncestryDNA didn’t destroy my family, but I was able to meet my biological father. My parents used IVF to have children and from the limited info we had before the testing, I assumed that part of my genetic makeup would remain a mystery. It was an eye opening experience and I am glad I did it.
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15points
#37
Not me, but my wife. She got a match with someone that didn't make sense. She reached out to them, and it turns out she has a brother that she didn't know about. Turns out her dad cheated on her mom when my wife was very young, and that produced a son. My wife's mom and dad divorced when she was 5 from another cheating incident, so while surprising, it wasn't at the same time.
Everyone has met and they are trying to get a relationship going, which I think is cool. It wasn't my wife's brother's fault he was illegitimately conceived, the parents have been long divorced on my wife's side, so the weirdness is largely minimized.
Everyone has met and they are trying to get a relationship going, which I think is cool. It wasn't my wife's brother's fault he was illegitimately conceived, the parents have been long divorced on my wife's side, so the weirdness is largely minimized.
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15points
#38
My 75-year-old grandmother just found out her dad was not her real dad. Turns out her mom had an affair with the family doctor and never told a single soul. Not only did she find out her family doctor was her real dad (the one who birthed not only her but also all of her own children) but turns out this family doctor was sleeping with a lot of his patients. She now has a bunch of new half-sisters and brothers; some of them knew who their real dad was, and some of them didn’t. My great-grandmother was quite the secret keeper.
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15points
#39
Kind of the opposite. I found out I have an older sister, apparently my dad was being a little promiscuous lol. RIP old man. And she also shares my birthday, what are the chances?!
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13points
#40
My family wasn't destroyed, but my Grandpa held the family record for Neanderthal DNA variants and I broke the family record by just a few. I have 1 more than my mom. I just thought I'd share.
Edit: Lots of people are asking. I have 318 variants, my mom has 317, and my grandpa has ~312.
Edit: Lots of people are asking. I have 318 variants, my mom has 317, and my grandpa has ~312.
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12points