Marriage vows cover a lot of ground. Sickness and health, richer or poorer, till the Grim Reaper tears us apart. What they leave out is the fine print about secretly emptying the joint account or deciding the family dog should go to a shelter without telling anyone. A lot of scorned women are flocking online to compare notes on the exact moment the vows stopped applying.
A few viral threads asked wives to share the thing that made them call a lawyer, and the answers go far beyond dirty socks on the floor. Some stories are the final straw after years of smaller ones. Others are the first and only straw, coming from an oblivious narcissist who thought their actions were completely fine. Grab a drink, and maybe call your mom afterward.
#21
I will never be able to unsee "men marry because it looks good to other men. Not because of sentiment."
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7points
Some entries in this kind of thread go far beyond bad habits. The CDC's national survey on intimate partner violence estimates that about one in four US women has experienced severe physical violence from a partner at some point in her life. Control can also happen without any violence. Sociologist Evan Stark coined the term "coercive control" in 2007 for a pattern of monitoring, isolating, and restricting a partner's money and movements. England and Wales made it a crime in 2015, with a maximum sentence of five years in prison.
#22
My Exs sister was pregnant. Her and her husband had watched a scary movie in theater and came home, they went into their apartment and he saw himself in the mirror. He freaked out thinking it was an intruder and pushed his pregnant wife into the apartment and ran out. They are still together.
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7points
#23
night after my hysterectomy, my ex husband decided he was going to sleep in the back bedroom and leave me alone, fresh from surgery. I was also on blood thinners due to clotting disorder. he left me alone that night without water, without pain meds, without anything. I crawled to the kitchen on my hands and knees to get my meds. slept at the kitchen table. he didn't check on me all night. came out around 9 am.
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5points
#24
He didn’t get up from his computer when I came downstairs crying after learning my dad was d***g of cancer.
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5points
So when do these women finally file? Julie Brines and Brian Serafini at the University of Washington studied divorce filings in Washington State from 2001 to 2015 and found two spikes every year, in March and August. Their explanation was that couples hold out through the winter holidays and the summer vacation, hoping for a fresh start, and file once the season is over.
Afterward, most people do better than they expected. Psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington followed about 1,400 families for 30 years and found that most divorced adults adjusted within a few years, and many came out more confident than before. The First Wives Club put it more bluntly in 1996: "Don't get mad, get everything."
#25
We didn’t get divorced but we were engaged. While we were planning our wedding, specifically the entrance to the reception, he was pitching to me what could only be described as flash dance with his best friends to the hustlers anthem. Like, the first time walking into the room as husband and wife and I wasn’t even a thought. And when I pointed it out he said “well you need a groom to have the wedding, so good luck planning your dream wedding without me.” And I did. And I have never made a better decision in my life.
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5points
#26
He went to a bachelor party when I was very pregnant and sick with strep and a sinus infection and a teething toddler. Came home about 3 o’clock in the morning and said - Oh should I not have gone?
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5points
#27
We were hearing loud noises coming from our basement, he made me go down the stairs first. A few months later we took our kids to Disney, in the parking lot there was a women unconscious in between 2 cars. He said just leave her! I refused and called an ambulance.
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5points
#28
Doctor told me I had pneumonia and had to immediately go to hospital. Husband at the time refused to take me to hospital because he was cooking a chicken and couldn’t leave it.
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5points
#29
I crashed my bike and as my black eye started swelling up instead of suggesting ice or the ER he wanted to video tape me saying he didn’t punch me…
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5points
#30
I had my tubes tied, my ex husband picked up a shift the same day when he was supposed to be helping me with recovery because i couldn’t walk more than a few feet without being in excruciating pain. My mom had to take care of me instead, it was humiliating.
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5points
#31
One time we were walking downtown and a random man walked up to us and was talking. The man mentioned cutting someone with a CD. My then husband walked away and left me there with that man.
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5points
#32
He got mad at me because I was in pain from the medicine wearing off after emergency wisdom tooth removal. Something about being in pain and having the person who is supposed to love and care for you treat you terribly just feels difference. Its a different kind of evil because you are vunerable. My current person made soup for my mom when she was sick when we weren’t even officially dating!
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5points
#33
Yeah, why do people think ‘Women and children first’ became a saying.
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4points
#34
We were white water rafting and trained that if someone across the boat from you falls off to reach over and grab them by the vest to pull them back on. I was sitting across from my bf. We hit a rock, I go overboard into the cold water, and I look up to see my now ex staring at me, frozen. The teenage kid sitting behind me reached in and grabbed me. The whole boat was like after that.
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4points
#35
There was a major hurricane approaching, he said he had to run to his parents house really quick and he’d come back for me and our pets. He didn’t come back, our house flooded up to the second floor.
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4points
#36
I left a guy because he didn’t check on me after a tornado touched down by my workplace. I’m married to the man that actually did.
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4points
#37
There were many reasons, but this is a solid one: he was pissed at me during a Durham Bulls baseball game. When it was over, he took my phone and gave me a dollar to figure out the bus system. At this point, it was near midnight in downtown Durham, and I was left with a dollar and no phone to get myself home! I was sobbing and petrified!
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4points
#38
Even after divorce I text him that our teenage daughter is having emergency appendectomy surgery. He texts back four hours later “thx for letting me know”. Never asked about any details or outcome.
4points
#39
I had a boyfriend who worked in the same office as me and one time the fire alarm went off (not a drill) and he literally ran past me, didn’t acknowledge me after looking right at me, wiggled his way infront of a bunch of other people (including older) people and ran down the stairwell. This was the most ick inducing F you I’ve ever seen. I knew so badly in that moment what i was dealing with.
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4points
#40
I was 36 weeks pregnant with our 2nd child. Husband knew I had an OB appointment that day. Dr. checked me and I was 5 cm dilated and was convinced that I would have the baby in the next 24 hours. I tried calling my husband 5 times to let him know. He didn't answer and never called me back to make sure I wasn't having the baby! He came home from work 5 hours later and seemed annoyed that I was so hurt by his behavior. We are no longer married.
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4points
