Babies, the blabbering bundles of bliss! What our lives would be without their fat cannoli legs, bald oddly-shaped heads, hilariously tiny chubby fingers, the softest butts imaginable, and a stream of subconscious gibberish pouring from their toothless mouths? Probably sleeping soundly through the night, not scrubbing off puke from our favorite T-shirts, and not stepping into puddles of unknown origin with our warmest plushie socks. This duality of human babies and the inherently different likes and dislikes shared with their adult life-givers (starting with the love and hate for naps and ending with favorite foods) are the greatest conflicts known for any scriptwriter, movie director, and jokester. Thus, there’s no surprise that jokes dedicated to babies are aplenty and are simply the greatest. At least to the parents, because babies haven’t declared their positions on the matter as of yet, and we cannot speak in their place.
So, baby jokes - some are dedicated to their creepy laughs, others to their sense of fashion, and of course, there are the ones talking about their eating habits. However, you must believe that all these baby puns and jokes definitely came straight out of somebody’s experience of raising their spawn, so besides being funny, they are also good material on what to expect when you have your own tiny human. Unimaginably, it is not all fun and games! Who could’ve thought?!
Anyway, prepare to laugh rambunctiously at the hilarious jokes you’re about to find just a couple of inches below. Just be sure to contain it if you have a soundly sleeping baby next to you, or he’ll be the one that’s bellowing but for slightly different reasons than you. After you’re done skimming through these funny baby jokes, vote for the ones that hit closest to home and share this article with your friends!
#161
What would you call a baby owl if it got caught in the rain? It'd become a moist-owlette.
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#162

Did you hear about the baby who swallowed a watch? The doctor told the parents to give the baby some Epsom salts, which should help him pass the time.
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#163
Which candy bar do all infants prefer? It's the Baby Ruth.
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#164

"Here, you take the baby and give me the eggs... You always drop everything!"
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#165
My wife said to put a baby monitor in the crib with our son... but I don't think lizards make very good pets for babies.
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#166

Have you heard about Gucci's new line of baby clothes? Gucci-goo.
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#167
What is the difference between a man and childbirth? One can be terribly painful and sometimes almost unbearable, while the other is just having a baby.
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#168

Where do baby ghosts go during the day? Dayscare centers.
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#169
How did the baby almost get her and her mom kicked out of the crowded theater? She yelled, “pacifier!”
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