People Are Adding "And Then The Murders Began" To Famous Book Openings, And It's Impossible Not To Laugh

When age fell upon the world, and wonder went out of the minds of men; when grey cities reared to smoky skies tall towers grim and ugly, in whose shadow none might dream of the sun or of spring’s flowering meads; when poets sang no more save of twisted phantoms seen with bleared and inward-looking eyes; when these things had come to pass, and childish hopes had gone away forever, there was a man who travelled out of life on a quest. And then the murders began.
- HP . Lovecraft - Azathoth

Gordon Edgely's sudden death was a shock to everyone - not least himself. And then the murders began.
- Derek Landy : Skulduggery Pleasant

It was missing a piece. And it was not happy. And then the murders began.
- Shel Silverstein : The missing piece

Marley was dead, to begin with.

And then the murders began.

(Charles Dickens, "A Christmas Carol")

Far off in deep space spins a wonderful, dangerous, young world. Some of its inhabitants call it the world of two moons. In the distant future, its people will call it "Abode".. One thing is for certain. This world is not Earth. It never has been, it never will be. And then the murders began.
- Wendy and Richard Pini : Elfquest - New Blood

Between her toes the damp earth felt cool, but already sweat crept between the roots of her hair. And then, the murders began.
(Remnant Population, Elizabeth Moon)

In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since.
And then the murders began.

1801 - I have just returned from a visit to my landlord - the solitary neighbour that I shall be troubled with.
And then the murders began.

1801 - I have just returned from a visit to my landlord - the solitary neighbour that I shall be troubled with.
And then the murders began. (Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte)

I thought I'd been to Africa. Told all my class I had. And then the murders began. (Small Island, Andrea Levy)

3 May. Bistritz. - Left Munich at 8.35 p.m. on 1st May, arriving at Vienna early next morning; should have arrived at 6.46, but train was an hour late. And then the murders began. (Dracula, Bram Stoker)

"What's it going to be then, eh?" And then the murders began. (A Clockwork Orange, Anthony Burgess)

We slept in what had once been the gymnasium. And then the murders began. (The Handmaid's Tale, Margaret Atwood)

The Time Traveller (for so it will be convenient to speak of him) was expounding a recondite matter to us. And then the murders began. (The Time Machine, H.G. Wells)

Tyler gets me a job as a waiter, after that Tyler's pushing a gun in my mouth and saying, the first step to eternal life is you have to die. And then the murders began. (Fight Club, Chuck Palahnuik)

Will Graham sat Crawford down at a picnic table between the house and the ocean and gave him a glass of iced tea. And then the murders began. (Red Dragon, Thomas Harris)

Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. And then the murders began.
(Ulysses, James Joyce)

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,.... and then the murders began...

In the great green room, there was a telephone and a red balloon and a picture of the cow jumping over the moon. And then the murders began.

It was very late and everyone had left the cafe except an old man who sat in the shadow the leaves of the tree made against the electric light. And then the murders began.
(More Ernest Hemingway. A Clean, Well-Lighted Place)