If there’s one thing we hope these pictures will convince you of, it’s that mistakes are an unavoidable part of life. However, accepting this fact can take time. So we reached out to licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Laura Bowles to learn how to embrace it.
Dr. Bowles is a member of the NY Health Hypnosis & Integrative Therapy team. She specializes in treating eating disorders, anxiety, panic disorders, IBS, gut and digestive issues, self-esteem, motivation, and relationship challenges.
"Fear of failure can have many origins," Dr. Bowles told Bored Panda. "People who experienced harsh criticism or rejection from parents, caregivers, or loved ones while growing up can develop a fear of failure. The same goes for those who experienced shame, embarrassment, or bullying after experiencing failure."
Dr. Bowles said that people who struggle with perfectionism can also be frightened of failing. "What can sometimes be underlying this fear is low self-esteem, meaning a lack of confidence or belief in oneself," she explained.
And it's on the rise, especially in younger people. A study conducted between 1989 and 2016 found that levels of perfectionism in college students "increased by statistically significant amounts." Perhaps even more concerning, perfectionism caused by societal pressure increased at twice the rate of self-oriented and other-oriented perfectionism.
The old saying that we learn more from failure than success holds a lot of truth. "It very often has the potential to be a positive experience," Dr. Bowles added.
"Many of our failures, particularly as children, teach us different ways to approach problems and come up with solutions. Being able to safely and healthily work through failure as a child builds resiliency — the ability to withstand and overcome difficulties."
In one of his commercials, Michael Jordan said: "I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. That is why I succeed."
You might think it’s corny, but it definitely gets the sentiment across.
However, even Jordan cried when he was cut from his school's basketball team. Granted, he was still a teen, but there's nothing wrong with people who have mixed feelings after their mistakes. On the contrary.
"Failure can be quite painful, and can bring up many different conflicting emotions," Dr. Bowles said. "One of the best approaches to events that cause us pain is to accept our feelings. Allow yourself to sit with and process your feelings after the event without pushing them away."
