People Still Remember How Their Moms Were Cruel Enough To Say These 50 Things To Them

As a woman navigating life in a world full of challenges, your mother is often one of your first role models. She’s usually the person who shows you how to relate to others, how to behave in society, and what love, care, or connection is supposed to look like. So when that person treats you with cruelty or only offers love conditionally, it can shape your entire sense of self.

To understand just how deep that impact can go, Bored Panda spoke with Carly Boyle, an inner child specialist who offers one-on-one therapy.

“Emotionally hurtful comments made by a mother during childhood can have a lasting impact that extends far beyond the moment they are spoken,” Boyle explains.

“From birth to around age seven, children are in what is known as the imprinting stage. During this time, they are forming core beliefs about themselves, their relationships, and the world around them. A mother’s words carry immense weight during these years, and what she repeatedly says—or doesn’t say—can become deeply embedded in the child’s subconscious.”

While many people associate lasting emotional damage with more visible forms of trauma, such as physical or sexual assault, Boyle points out that trauma isn’t always about what happened, it’s also about what didn’t.

“The absence of nurturing words, encouragement, or emotional attunement can shape a child’s sense of worth just as much as overt criticism or rejection. Silence, emotional distance, or dismissiveness can leave a child feeling unseen, unimportant, or not good enough,” she says.