Parents Share What Disappointed Them About Having Kids, And Here Are 50 Of The Most Honest Responses

The weight gain! During the pregnancy I gained 35 lbs. My belly has stretch marks. My boobs are all saggy.
And it’s not even fair because my wife only gained like 15.

Losing them. My 15 year old son died suddenly on Tuesday morning. His dad went to wake him for school and he wasn't breathing. He had no health conditions and we don't know the cause of death yet. My baby is just gone.

Every single part of parenting is a challenge. But losing a child is a pain unlike anything I've ever known. Having a child is taking a risk that someday your whole world could be shattered, and there's absolutely nothing you can do to stop it.

ETA: Thank you so much to everyone who has commented. This has been such a devastating time for me, and it really does help to know that people out there care enough to comfort and grieve with a stranger. Thank you all, from the bottom of my heart.

New parent here (baby is less than 6 months old).

The worst part so far is all the unsolicited advice. Apparently everything you know is wrong, and the only reliable source is "trust me, I raised kids 30 / 60 years ago, this is how it should be done".

Well, Sharon, I saw your work, and I am not a fan.

Worrying about them for the rest of your life.

BigThistyBeast replied:

My dad died at 64 in 2017. Grandma is still around and she’s 96 now. Every time I see her she starts crying and tells me stories about him as a child. Breaks my heart that she still is in pain from it. Outliving your children must be horrible no matter how old you are

The days drag on, but the years fly by.

Worrying about how the outside world will treat them.

When you have a child who has severe difficulties (whether physical or mental). In our case, my daughter has a severe mental illness. Everyone gets pregnant and thinks everything is going to be wonderful and the kid is automatically going to grow up and get good grades and have friends and do normal kid things. That’s what you think and that’s what everyone tells you. It’s a cruel thing to realize that in reality, generics is a lottery and some of us WILL lose. Some kids will NOT have the life you envisioned.

When you give them life advice and they listen to their stupid 17 year old friends instead. Most frustrating thing ever.

Also, I'd like to apologize to my parents for when I was 17 and stupid.

If they are born with severe disabilities, you will need to take care of them or make plans for their care for as long as they are alive. It’s heartbreaking, many marriages don’t make it. My utmost respect to parents of special needs children.

That even though one may raise them as good as possible, that child may still turn out to be an evil human being.

My daughter is almost 18. For me the worst part was losing my little buddy who always wanted daddy. She would hug and kiss all the time, say I love you and I was always her safe space.

She turned 13 or 14 and that was the end. She became a teen and didn’t need mom and dad or affection anymore. I didn’t know it happened like that.

I know she loves us, but they just stop showing it. It’s a big loss actually.

Having to deal with their total lack of self-preservation. They are creative and come up with all kinds of ways to try and kill themselves, keeping ahead of the game is exhausting.

Having to take care of a sick child when you are also sick. For me that has been the most challenging part so far.

For me I just really like to be alone sometimes. Before kids I would just go downstairs and watch a tv show, play PlayStation, or play guitar and my wife would do her own thing as well. Now, I have maybe 1 hour of alone time (sometimes none) every couple of days. It’s at 11 at night and I’m tired as f**k then and the next day.

It’s the hardest part for me. Love them to death, but it’s hard to be “on” all the time with work and them when at home.

Playing the lottery of having a healthy child. Our daughter was diagnosed with schizophrenia during her teens. It's a rollercoaster of emotions. We have our good days and bad. Having to explain the diagnosis to people who feel uncomfortable being around our daughter because of the stigma displayed in the news and movies. The worst, for me, is watching her friends and our family's children have a more "normal" life. It's like reopening a wound everytime someone gets married, graduates, or some other milestone in life.

I'm so tired. Just tired all the time. I don't ever remember not feeling tired.

Having depression and having depressed children f*****g sucks. If you have mental illness, and you’re kids get the same mental illness it will double your mental illness.

You have to feed them like every day.

When people ask me this I say.
You know those video games where you have to escort a character to a destination without them being attacked.
That's parenting.
Those missions are a pain in the a*s.

The worry that I’m a bad parent that’s doing things wrong.