35 Women Share What's The Most Insulting Thing They've Heard From Their Employers

The author of the thread, redditor BayAreaDreamer, told Bored Panda that the #MeToo movement did "a good job of bringing to light the various experiences women have far too often with sexual harassment and sexual violence."

"The sexism that's alive in workplaces and which the redditor has experienced is what drove them to ask other women to share their own stories. "I think this issue is a crosscutting one with issues of sexual violence also, since economic success and independence (or lack thereof) plays a big role in whether women are able to win respect publicly or leave domestic abusers privately," the redditor said.

BayAreaDreamer said that speaking to HR is an option, however, this requires that there's actually a clear case of illegal behavior taking place. "[This] isn't always the case when it comes to subtler versions of sexism. Additionally, I have worked at organizations that don't have HR, and where I had an Executive Director basically accuse me of lying when I told him that a Senior employee was not only yelling at female employees and behaving in a generally aggressive and hostile manner but also had said that he came into the organization with the goal to take over from that same Executive Director (it was not a lie)."

They added: "In general, I think creating workplaces that are more welcoming of gender diversity is going to require creating organizations where there is close to gender parity in hiring at every level (not just lower-level staff, which is what often happens)."

Bored Panda also wanted to get the redditor's opinion about what makes for a good boss or manager. In their opinion, accountability is a vital part of this. "In general, I think there is a tendency for many people (men and even sometimes women) to point at a man in a position of relative power who has behaved badly and say, 'We shouldn't punish him because that would risk destroying his career, and he adds value to the organization (or movement, in case of politicians).' However, I don't think enough people ask, 'What of value could these women have contributed if they weren't pushed out by hostile/inappropriate men? How can we justify the tremendous potential value that is being lost there?'

They continued: "I'd like to see more people focusing on that latter set of questions, and striving to design workplaces where everyone can realize their full potential. Also, I learned about a cool technology tool some workplaces were experimenting with where people could report workplace sexual harassers anonymously online, and if two or more people both experienced issues with the same person, they'd automatically be notified and given the other's contact info so they could decide what steps to take next."

A system like that could have the power to change things for the better in the fight against workplace discrimination. "Often people in power who abuse their power deliberately do it in a way such that the person being targeted feels isolated and isn't sure if they're somehow responsible or not—so technology that can help employees identify patterns of problematic behavior makes sense to me."

Generally, if your boss or manager is harassing you, the first thing you should do is politely but firmly tell them that they’re being rude or that you feel uncomfortable. However, if you’re scared for your job, you should instead talk to your Human Resources department.

Unfortunately, while some HR departments are a true godsend, others are merely an extension of the boss’ influence. Naturally, some employees find that their complaints about legitimate issues fall on deaf ears or that they’re even reprimanded for raising the topic at all. If the insults, harassment, and bullying all persist, it’s time to think about litigation. It’s a last resort, but it shouldn’t be discounted if nothing else works and your life suffers.

At the end of the day, each and every one of us sets our own boundaries for what we’re willing to live with at work. If your bosses are being unresponsive, if the HR is unhelpful, and you find the quality of your work dropping because of the toxic atmosphere, it’s time to consider other options. You’re there to work, not be someone’s verbal and emotional punching bag.

Here at Bored Panda, we’ve covered workplace topics in great depth: from issues with poor management and (un)helpful HR departments to the gender pay gap, sexism, and how the pandemic has affected women in the workforce.

Australian heart and lung surgeon Dr. Nikki Stamp told Bored Panda in an earlier interview that it’s mostly men who don’t believe in the existence of the gender pay gap. Some of them attribute the difference in wages not to sexism but to women deciding to have children.

“The reason that this is problematic is that it isn’t economic or legal actions that will resolve the gender pay gap but cultural changes. If people don’t even believe something exists, how can we change it?” Dr. Stamp said.