“He Cheated On Me”: 30 Women Who Were Mistresses Share What Happened

Why doesn’t the man who actually has the loyalty to his wife get blamed? Why does the woman who has no loyalty to that man’s wife or man in question get blamed? I was tricked into one of these relationships, guy told me he was single, I fell for him, found out after 3 years he was unhappily married with kids, I ended it, he renewed his vows and has another child on the way!

I'm opposite. He cheated on me with someone in our friend group.

She is now one of my absolute best friends and my sister in law. Aka, I married her brother.

He was 23, I was 21, she was 17. He was amazing at making you feel incredibly special and wonderful until he thought you were staying, then he would slowly destroy you and your world.

Also, she was a child and he was an adult. She takes none of the blame.

Yes, we have talked about it and have agreed we are both better off without him.

I was a piece of s**t. Insecure, jealous, I had no hobbies, I was bitter and vindictive. I was 17-22 f*****g around with a married man who was 10 years older than me. He left his first marriage and literally married a different woman and I was still gobbling up his d**k like it was the best thing ever and thought he would wake up and chose me. It was mediocre at best and he was a s**t person too. I feel bad... mostly for myself. I was a young woman who didn't respect herself and allowed men to disrespect me and their wives. Not really much more to say than that :(.

I didn't know for two years. When I confronted him about making plans on FB to move in with another chick and accused him of having another woman, he told me that technically I was the other woman, but she was willing to let me move in with them. We broke up and he moved in with her a few months later.

A year after we broke up he called me complaining that she wasn't financially responsible and wasn't able to run a house as well as me. He asked me to move to Florida with him. I laughed at him and said he should have thought about that before telling me I was the other woman.

He left her for me, I married him, he cheated on me with her hahaha 💀💀💀.

Oh one I can answer! To clarify, I am not trying to justify what I did and fully acknowledge it was wrong. I’m just trying to explain what factors led to the situation.

I had just started a new job and after a few months, ended up completely falling for my married boss. I knew it was wrong and tried to keep my distance but we had a bunch of business trips together which resulted in a lot of 1:1 time. Mentally, I was in a really dark place. I had a string of dates that didn’t go anywhere where I felt rejected and used, gained 40lbs, and my self esteem plummeted. Meanwhile I had this super attractive, successful guy at work lifting me up, telling me I’m smart, beautiful, and that any guy who isn’t into me is an idiot. Anytime I was with him I would finally feel alive again and felt like we just had magnetic chemistry. He also admitted to feeling the same way towards me.

We tried not to do anything but after a year of tension we finally ended up hooking up. I knew he was married, I knew it was wrong. I never met the wife but thought she must be a much better person than I was. My colleagues had met her and I knew she was beautiful, fit, and seemed really kind. I was at such a low point in my life that I would take the scraps just to be with him. It was a tumultuous relationship and I tried to end it many times but because we literally worked together in a tiny office and I still had intense feelings for him, it would start back up. I tried dating other people to take my mind off things but couldn’t because I was so in love with him. I felt trapped and would frequently cry in the office bathroom, knowing I needed to get out somehow.

I ended up breaking it off with him, resigning and taking a $70K pay cut just to get myself out of the situation ASAP. Then COVID hit and the new company scaled back their operations and because I was a new employee I was laid off. I then spent the next year in a super deep depression but eventually managed to get myself out of it.

So I honestly didn’t set out to have a relationship with a married man, I just kind of fell into it over time and made a series of poor decisions. The wife ended up finding out after I had already resigned and I know she is the main victim here and I feel terrible that I hurt someone innocent.

I have since landed back on my feet, gotten a new job, lost all the weight I gained, and am feeling far more confident in myself. Obviously I stay far away from married men and if the situation had happened now instead of at such a low point in my life, I would like to think I would make better decisions. I guess I’m writing all this in response to the comments stating that these women are always “heartless bitches who want to win over a married man”. I mean sure, that can be the case, but there are also situations which are far more nuanced.

I didn’t choose to be but was unknowingly a side chick for almost a year. It still blows my mind to this day how long he managed to lie to two women for and how his wife never cottoned on as he was always with me.

He had a bachelor pad in the city, told his coworkers he’d separated and paraded me around to them at events as well as coming to all my family and work events and coming on a few vacations with me. All while checking in with his wife every few weekends when I thought he was going to visit his elderly mom. I met a few of his family members but never his mom.

His best friend finally told me at a dinner that he was still married and that I should have a chat with his « ex » so I got brave and sent her a message on facebook.

It was wild, she was super nice to me, kicked him out and I cut ties and blocked him on everything. She said that things hadn’t been great, they hadn’t been intimate in six years but were still very much married. She just thought he was working all the time.

The weirdest thing was that a few months later I think she must have taken him back because she started sending me super nasty messages. I understand that I was sleeping with her husband but it was unknowing and I think if I were in her position I would have placed greater blame on my ex.

All in all, if you have a choice in the matter do not do it. Men who cheat are the lowest of the low and we can all do so much better.

It made me a bit sad that his wife turned on me like that but I kind of get it. I am glad I spoke to her though because he could have kept it up for a long time! I’ve since upgraded big time and am engaged to a lovely man who is definitely not two timing. It took a long time to trust again though and I hope anyone else who has been in this kind of mess gets their own happy ending ❤️.

I chose to be a sidechick when I was in the closet. I felt like no one else would love me, so this would have to be good enough. I didn't understand that I deserved more.
It became abusive. It took me longer than it should to exit the relationship for good but I finally did.
I would never again. Being in a secret relationship puts you in a perfect position to be abused. No one to witness it. No one to share your concerns.

I had a friend that cheated on all her partners or dated other friend’s partners. She was extremely attractive and seductive. She knew exactly how to get any man. The day she told me she slept with our mutual friend’s boyfriend, I knew I couldn’t trust her. Our friendship fizzled out months later.

I didn’t know it when I met him. Clearly he was a player, but I wanted to play. When I found out about his GF I was shocked and embarrassed as I knew her personally. I didn’t do anything wrong, and it was his mess to fess up to as I was not the only one. I moved on and grew up from all that. They broke up over it. She deserved better and got it.

Nurse here, who has seen many other women date married men, they do it because they think that they can 'steal' a husband from another woman. And it works a surprising number of times, as long as the guy can afford the divorce, the alimony, the child support, and a second wife.

I did it because I had no self respect or self esteem and was desperate for validation and he was the only one giving it to me.

I stopped because I started taking medication for my depression and generally grew as a person and gained some self love.

I truly did not even think about his girlfriend. My thought process was " if he does not care about her why should i?".

I always thought we were just work friends, I knew he was married and he always mentioned his wife with a smile, so I never thought about him in that way (and for a long time I wasn't attracted to him at all). However, we started spending lots of time together due to work and somehow both found in each other what we were missing in our SOs - long and interesting conversations. We ended up confessing our feelings to each other but said that nothing can happen as we are both taken. However, I guess, hormones took over and we started getting physical. I remember feeling extremely guilty after every kiss but also excited, like I am finally alive. I ended it after I went to his apartment and saw pictures of his wife. That's when I finally realized that she is a real person, not just someone from his stories, and I was just disgusted by myself. He still tried to contact me and we met one time after that, but then one interesting thing happened - I found out my SO was cheating. The pain and heartbreak I experienced when I found out (and I am still heartbroken) is something that can not be described. I would have never imagined the pain to be so strong. I immediately cut all ties with the married man, told him to never contact me again and to focus on his marriage and his wife. It still haunts me that, if she would find out, she would be crushed just like I was crushed. I would never want that pain to anyone, and the thought that I may have caused that intense life changing pain to his wife is just disturbing. I still have nightmares of what I have done. Probably will regret that all my life.

Honestly? Desire. The thought of being desired so much that he was willing to sacrifice his living situation and long-term relationship was disorienting. It felt like a dr*g I couldn't get enough of. The heart pounding adrenalin of watching him debate in real time if he was going to cheat, and then feeling him look at me and decide didn't want to, but HAD to. It was a dr*g. And I think that's the best metaphor, because dr*gs are dangerous. And they ruin people's lives.

I didn’t do it, but someone I know did. Mainly to boost her ego. She thought that since he slept with her, she was better than the main girlfriend.

Because I have major commitment issues and the idea of a low-maintenance "relationship" is the dream. Spoiler alert: it ended with me feeling like a complete idiot.

I did.

I chose it because I wanted him.

His marriage was already dead in the water. He cheated on his wife with me (kissed me) and the following day I told him we shouldn’t pursue this and I would take the secret to my grave if that was what he wanted.

He split up from his wife, moved out, and asked me on a date two weeks later.

We’ve been married ten years and have two children.

He told me he left her. He didn't. So I chose to out him to her every chance I could get. Ie. He'd send me letters apologizing or begging we stay together, so I'd mail them to her workplace so she could see what a loser she has. Welp... he died at age 35, she got a $950,000 insurance payout, and I was left salty and bitter. Lol.

I was 16, he was 29. He made me feel beautiful, and gave me attention. He also said he was going to end it with his girlfriend and I guess I wanted to believe him.

Of course, once he got what he wanted, and after a pregnancy scare, he stopped talking to me altogether. He never broke up with her, a friend lost complete respect for me for getting involved with a guy who was taken, and I lost even more self-esteem.

Not me but one of my friends who is still actively in her situation.

She was a waitress at a high end restaurant and he travels with the NFL (not an athlete). He was married with 3 kids (9-16) and his wife was a SAHM. He woo-ed her with all of these fancy trips and started paying for her Botox and nails and s**t. They started sleeping together about 2 years ago and though he didn’t have plans on leaving his wife, my friend’s ex (who’s a psycho narcissist but pretends to have ethics) somehow found out, managed to somehow get ahold of his wife and spilled all the beans. My friend is now currently living with him in a one bedroom apartment on the other side of the country. She “won” the man but is no longer benefiting from anything else. His salary was like, $14k/mo BUT after paying his wife’s mortgage, child support and spousal support, he’s only bringing in about $4k to the table now. No surprise, his kids absolutely despise my friend and also no surprise, the fancy trips are no longer a thing.