As a woman who has officially been in her 30s for two years now, I can also reassure gals in their 20s: it's not that scary. I've never been as physically fit, as confident, and as happy with my professional life as I am now compared to when I was still in my 20s. So, what is it about this particular milestone that scares so many young women?
For the most part, it's about being afraid of aging. Because women are socialized to tie their value to their looks, losing them is one of the worst things that can happen. The point of the beauty industry is to capitalize on women's insecurities by selling them firming creams, "de-aging" facials, and supplements that will allegedly reverse the aging process. According to research from Vantage, the size of the anti-aging market was $74.35 billion.
Comments from celebrities certainly don't help either. Taylor Swift, for example, described herself turning 30 in 2019 as "weird." Emma Stone says she felt "gloomy for about a week" after she entered her 30s. For both, turning 30 signaled that they were becoming adults. In your 20s, you're allowed to still be figuring things out, but by 30, you're supposed to have most things figured out.
Millennials are particularly having a hard time feeling like adults. As Natalie Morris writes for Metro UK, it's because of how financially unstable they feel. A little over 50% of Millennials in the U.S. own homes, but that's still lower than in all previous generations. Experts chalk it up to a lack of parental wealth, higher property prices, and enormous student debt.
Without having reached the financial goals that their parents and grandparents did by 30, Millennial women start feeling like they're running out of time. It's like they're saying: "Wait, I can't be turning 30 already; I still have to get a family, a mortgage, and a car first!" But our 30s come with more advantages than we can imagine, as with life experience come confidence, wisdom, and the "minding my own business" attitude.
In 2015, researchers actually suggested that women are at their happiest at 34. That's when most of us have a home, feel like we've settled down, and have established a career. In the UK, most women get married at 30, and it's also the average age when most women have their first baby. By 32, women also feel like they've found the perfect hairstyle that suits them best.
But why do we feel the pressure to look as we did in our 20s? Aging is a natural process and a privilege, and we should all be glad we're able to do it. Yet, women especially are conditioned to prevent and stop it as much as possible. Women in their 20s start having "preventative" Botox injections. Since 2010 up until 2017, 28% more women aged 20-29 have been getting Botox procedures, and there has also been a 32% increase in dermal fillers.
Why is trying to prevent aging bad for us? Well, it's associated with "aging anxiety," or at least that's what it's called in the field of gerontology. According to the Silver Century Foundation, individuals who experience a lot of aging anxiety are more likely to feel lonely, depressed, and isolated. Adults with ageist attitudes are also more likely to feel aging anxiety than their non-ageist peers.
