Any family—especially a large one—is a miniature version of our society, where there is room for all sorts of social issues. For example, someone sincerely believes that they're entitled to mock others in situations that seem unacceptable to them. And attempts to 'hush up' such bullying only encourage the offenders.
The story we are going to tell you today, from user u/Quiet_Mulberry_591, happened during a family gathering - and for some reason, the attempt to defend one's own personal boundaries was perceived by many family members as 'ruining the party.' However, let's just take things in order.
More info: Reddit
The author of the post doesn't like when anyone, even her closest people, touches her food or plate
Image credits: Mikhail Nilov / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Nearly all the relatives know this is her eating habit and try to respect it - but not her elder sis
Image credits: Quiet_Mulberry_591
Image credits: Askar Abayev / Pexels (not the actual photo)
During a recent family gathering at their mom's place, the sister started mocking this eating habit in public
Image credits: Quiet_Mulberry_591
Image credits: cottonbro studio / Pexels (not the actual photo)
She ended up taking a piece of chicken off the author's plate and eating it herself
Image credits: Quiet_Mulberry_591
Image credits: Mario Amé / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Our heroine just politely stood up and left the home, totally disappointed
Image credits: Quiet_Mulberry_591
However, now she takes heat from literally every family member, including the mom, for 'ruining the dinner'
The heroine of today's story is 24 years old. She has 4 siblings of different ages, and from time to time, they all get together at their mother's house. The whole family, with their spouses and little kids. During one of these gatherings, this story happened. The story where the Original Poster's (OP) reaction was most likely completely reasonable and moderate, but she took heat from many relatives—including her mom.
The thing is, the author literally hates it when someone takes food from her plate or just touches her dishes with their fingers. Many people actually have such eating habits (I, myself, am sometimes subject to something similar), and all of her relatives have known this for a long time. They try to respect this author's peculiarity.
But during a family dinner, our heroine's elder sister, for some reason, decided to mock her over this. Joke followed joke, pun followed pun, and it all ended with the sister simply snatching a piece of chicken from our heroine's plate with her fingers and, having eaten it, grinning sarcastically at her—like nothing terrible happened!
To the author's credit, she didn't throw a fit right at the table, but politely and calmly pushed her plate away and went outside. Having calmed down a bit, the OP then told her mother that she was going home, and left. And now many relatives, including her mother, actually accuse her of 'ruining the whole gathering.' Her—not the elder sis!
Image credits: KATRIN BOLOVTSOVA / Pexels (not the actual photo)
"In families with a large number of children, younger siblings sometimes develop such habits—when older kids can take food from younger ones, and thus a habit is developed," says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, who Bored Panda asked for a comment here. "So there's, in fact, nothing surprising in this case."
"Moreover, this woman acted in the most correct and calm manner possible here. She didn't publicly argue with the offender, and didn't go overly dramatic. She simply left, thereby indicating her personal boundaries and again pointing out the inadmissibility of their violation. And the only person who should be blamed for anything here is her sister.
"In fact, the policy of silent ‘patience’ and non-resistance to bullying from other people—just so as not to ‘blow up a scandal,’ almost never led to anything good. So this woman should probably explain the situation to her mother again and simply reduce communication with her sister—if she doesn't actually understand what she did," Irina concludes.
Well, almost all the commenters supported the original poster as much as possible, claiming that her elder sister's behavior was outrageous and that her mother was thereby actually encouraging her impunity. Many responders even believe that the author should go no contact with her sis since she allows herself to do such things. So what do you, our dear readers, think about this tale?
Most people in the comments claimed that the author's sister was 100% disrespectful, and even urged her to go no contact with her
