Family life in the Western parts of the world is changing: cohabitation is rising and childbearing is plummeting. More and more people are now opting for voluntary childlessness, a conscious decision to not have children despite the pervasive societal expectations, which are especially hard on women.
But despite the outdated views of a fulfilled family that sees kids as a crucial part of its equation, a life without children is the new normal. So when a redditor who goes by Foxscream posted the question “People who don’t ever want to have kids, why?” people had a lot to say about this topic.
The thread offers a fresh and much-needed perspective on what makes people not want to have children, and it’s a very important read for anyone who’s still skeptical about being childfree by choice.
#21
As someone who wants to become an elementary school teacher, people are often shocked to find out I don't want children. But the reason is simple: they cost a LOT of money, they take op a lot of free time and space and I have terrible genes.
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87points
#22
It’s expensive and I don’t wanna pass on my genes in particular.
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85points
“I think the future will see more people having fewer kids or none at all. Younger generations don't have the resources to support large families, and are more aware of the impact of that choice. And we're slowly making progress towards gender equality, with lots of (but not all) women now able to choose what they do with their lives.”
#23
I personally don't want to put my body thru the trauma of growing and birthing a child/children, I can barely emotionally handle myself a lot of the time and don't want to risk passing on any of my mental illnesses to someone who didn't ask to be born, and they're overall a huge financial burden and with the pandemic having destroyed my personal finances, I will never be in a financial position to feel comfortable raising a child.
80points
#24
I and my wife are both financially decent off, mentally and physically healthy and could probably pull off kids without a problem as such.
We just don’t want to. We value our collective freedom to do what we want, whenever we want to — to travel, to hike up a mountain, to go surfing, et cetera — too much.
And no, we don’t get lonely, we have plenty of friends and we have our dogs that tag along for all activites :)
DINK life is pretty sweet.
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80points
So Zoë believes that it's inevitable that the childfree choice is becoming more popular, as people don't feel like they have access to, or are compelled towards, the traditional one-size-fits-all lifestyle of the heteronormative nuclear family. “Hopefully projects like mine can encourage people to embrace this change as a net good for the planet, instead of lashing out from a conservative, reactionary place. More people making conscious choices in their own interests can only be a good thing!”
#25
Complete lack of a support system. You know the saying “it takes a village to raise a child?” Well we have no village anymore. Unless you happen to live nearby family, no one is around to help, you’re on your own. (You know those harried mothers in supermarkets who have screaming wailing children and they just look so exhausted and done with life? I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to feel that way, ever)
Money. I can barely support/ensure a future for myself, let alone a whole new human being with needs like diapers, medical visits, food, toys, etc. At 37 I’ve just started to be able to actually enjoy my life so throwing it all away because every cent needs to be spent on a kid is a recipe for mental health disaster.
Lack of body autonomy. As soon as that test is positive, your body is no longer your own. You are no longer a person, you are an incubator for “precious new life.” Doctor visits where you’re just out there for the world to see, people poking and prodding your “most secret” areas until they’re less of a secret and more of a billboard….then after you have the baby, the physical toll of giving more of yourself to feed it. I just can’t fathom that severe of a loss of self.
No sleep, constant exhaustion. I’m wiped enough working 8-5, doing a workout, cooking dinner and cleaning up after and all the other tasks of being an adult in a home, adding the additional lack of sleep and tasks of constantly keeping a child alive? I see it in peoples drawn faces and eye bags. Why would you want to invite that on yourself. (Also see lack of support system)
Kids destroy things. They make messes. I just was able to eke out a life for myself in a house and actually buy some new things and make it feel like I’m finally an adult…..for kids to ruin the couch I saved for or the tv I saved for would just be too much. Those are symbols of my hard work and accomplishments and you just destroyed it you little s—t, lol
Also I’m just scared of all the medical stuff. The things that can go wrong, the pain, the changes to your body, the pain, the recovery process (with or without anyone to help you), the pain…..
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77points
#26
My wife and I have tons of health issues, mental and physical, including chronic depression, crohns, epilepsy, etc.
The world is just a nasty place and there's no reason to bring a child into it anymore
Money and freedom to travel.
Kids are loud, gross, expensive and annoying and I like to sleep in and go anywhere and do anything on a dime.
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70points
#27
I love my niece and nephew too but after an entire day with them i really, really need some peace and quiet. If its your own kids, you dont get that. So i imagine that but 24/7 and i dont understand how people do it.
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66points
#28
It's easier and cheaper being an aunt. Chase a toddler around a splash pad so that I can enjoy it too- nice. Same toddler is cranky- give it back to the parents. I might treat it to ice cream now and then but I don't have to worry about future school expenses. Etc, etc.
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57points
#29
That whole thing about your friends start having kids and it will make you want one. Funny thing was people around me having kids was the exact reason my 50/50 went to I don't want them. I can tolerate kids for short spans of time like I'll babysit but at the end of the day I don't have to deal with the stressful part of having kids( sickness, tantrums, money, etc.)
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56points
#30
I can barely go through my period without painkillers, I'll never manage to give birth. Also, I don't like kids, they're annoying.
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53points
