In life, it’s best to do your very best to get the result that you want and then relinquish any and all expectations. You did your best. Well done! Now sit back and don’t fret, find something else to do. If you get what you want, fantastic. If not, no big deal—you’ll try again later. Maybe with a different tactic in mind.
Having low expectations is a healthy mindset, similar to the one where you’re encouraged to do good things for people without expecting anything in return. Life has a pleasant way of surprising us when we’re not desperate, needy, and whiny.
PsychCentral explains that the first step in relinquishing unrealistic expectations is being able to spot them. Of course, that’s easier said than done because we may have had certain expectations for years and years. And a lot of it’s connected to our desire to maintain control over everything.
Some examples of completely unrealistic expectations include the beliefs that everyone should like you and that the world should be fair. We simply can’t have that kind of control over the world (well, unless we’re a superhero, the Emperor of the Universe, or a member of the Greek Pantheon).
Similarly, if we’re constantly disappointed by results and not having our expectations met every step of the way, well, maybe it’s time to analyze them in detail. Spend the weekend looking at your belief structures.
Give yourself permission to not have everything go perfectly. Embrace flexibility. That doesn’t mean giving up your high standards (quality is good stuff, people), but you have to be relatively down to earth. Otherwise, you’ll spend the rest of your life making wanted vs. got TikTok videos.
