#1
He smashed the cake in her face.
She had it annulled.
#2
#3
They were friends of mine who dated for nearly two years before their wedding. He loved her more than she loved him, obvious to all our friends, and we suspected she begrudgingly said yet to his proposal.
He said his vows first and went on and on about loving her for the rest of his life. During hers, she started with "438 days... that's how long I've loved you." It seemed sweet until she ended her vows with, "And I promise to love you for at least 438 more." Most thought nothing of it and some friends called me a [jerk] for saying it was a subconscious sign she wasn't in it for the long haul.
She left him exactly that amount of days after the wedding with a note that said 'I kept my vow to love you for 438 days more, but I can't for a single day more.'
Called it.
If you’re on social media, you’ve probably seen clips of newlyweds aggressively smashing the cake into each other’s faces. It’s becoming especially popular on platforms like TikTok, where the #cakesmash hashtag has racked up millions of views.
Some experts trace this trend back to ancient Rome, where a groom would crumble pieces of sweet barley cake over a bride’s head for good luck. There was nothing aggressive about it though.
It is unclear exactly when the practice switched to smearing it onto the face.
These days, the cake on the face ritual doesn’t really carry much deeper meaning or symbolism. It’s more about fun — assuming, of course, the person getting smashed is actually on board with it.
Some people see this as a major wedding red flag. “If you smash cake, I don’t know what it represents, but for some reason, none of my brides and grooms that did that are still together,” wedding planner Robin Yarusso said in a TikTok video.
#4
#5
I was the groom.
#6
Let’s break down why some of these signs matter, starting with the cake-smashing trend.
Brides spend an average of $2,982 thousands on their dress, hair, and makeup just to feel their best on the wedding day, according to a survey done in the US.
So, it’s safe to assume that most don’t want it ruined with cake or anything else.
This kind of moment can also feel like public humiliation. Experts say that it can point to a bigger issue around respect and boundaries in the relationship. “The cake incident often becomes evidence of a long-standing pattern where ‘no’ doesn’t mean ‘no,’” says Michelle T. Dellino, the CEO and founding attorney of Dellino Family Law Group.
Her clients often report that non-consensual cake-smashing at their wedding turned into decades of dismissed boundaries, regarding “finances, parenting decisions, and major life choices.”
#7
This is something I will never understand. If marriage sounds THAT awful to you, why even get married?
#8
I gave her the benefit of the doubt (chalked it up to wedding anxiety) and during the reception I tried to chat with her a bit and she literally rolled her eyes at me. I also didn't see her look at the groom once at the wedding or the reception.
They were split less than a year later. Later, the groom confided to me and my husband that the morning of the wedding he'd been filled with an overwhelming feeling of dread and spent several hours just sitting on his lawn, thinking, "I shouldn't do this." But it was paid for, tons of guests were waiting, lots of family (including us) had come in from out of state, and he felt he had to go through with it. Apparently the bride had a history of being awful and controlling. No clue what made him propose to her in the first place.
Edit: Just Facebook stalked the (ex) bride. Her latest status update is announcing her wedding date with a new guy. Someone "jokingly" asked in the comments if they've set a date for the divorce. Oh snap.
#9
Robin Yarusso, whose TikTok video went viral last year and was liked by close to 270,000 people, said she can recognize a bride and groom that are going to get divorced before they even get married.
“So I’ve planned like 100 weddings and probably like 25, 30 proposals, and there are certain things that happen that I’ve seen time and time again with my brides and grooms that have divorced later on.”
According to her, some of the biggest red flags show up in how couples handle the wedding planning itself. One is when one partner is careful about the budget, but the other ignores it or secretly goes behind their back to add extra expenses. She describes these as the “don’t tells” — patterns that often lead to divorce.
#10
#11
#12
Another warning sign, Yarusso says, is when a parent of the bride or groom oversteps during planning and the partner doesn’t set boundaries.
She also points to cases where one partner seems disengaged from the wedding altogether.
While these small moments may seem like they're all part of the planning process, they are indicators of deeper issues. “We all know there are common reasons for a divorce. Money, trust, contempt, boundaries. If I have a bride that is hiding the true cost of flowers from her future husband, that falls right into money and trust,” she told Newsweek.
#13
#14
They were divorced a year later.
#15
1) At what I've dubbed "The worst wedding ever," the bride and groom were an hour late, argued with everyone at the wedding, ran out of food at the reception, and made the groom's mom cry by yelling at her.
2) When the bride cried through the entire ceremony, it clicked in my head that she wasn't just room-mates with the guy she lived with (not the groom). They were an actual couple. She married the groom because her mom wanted her to do so. A year later, she was making up this story about the husband being a control freak (like that crummy Julia Roberts movie where she runs away from the freaky husband). Meanwhile, the guy was just nice and quiet and didn't do anything that she said he did.
Experts believe that wedding planning can bring up relationship issues because it’s usually the first important joint event of a couple’s life.
“You’re potentially seeing your partner in a new light and different aspects to their personality that aren't just there every day,” Amy Parfitt, co-founder of Wedshed, explained.
Another major red flag, experts say, is when the wedding becomes more important that the marriage.
#16
#17
#18
#19
The groom making fun of the deaf grandmother.
The groom existing.
What do you do if, God forbid, you notice these signs at your own wedding, or at the wedding of a loved one?
First off, do not panic. What might feel like a red flag to your maid of honor, could actually be a small misunderstanding or the stress of the day.
One of the most common suggestions is to talk about it early and directly. Increased conflict during wedding planning can be a signal to step back and have an honest conversation, rather than pushing through the stress.
Another step is seeking couples therapy or a neutral third perspective. Experts point out that wedding stress can amplify existing issues. Support can help couples figure out whether they’re dealing with temporary pressure or a deeper mismatch.
And finally: trust your instincts.
“If the marriage isn’t going to work, most people know that before they get married. You get a feeling. So, if you’re seeing these, and it’s a red flag indicator, and you’re suppressing it down because you can’t call off a wedding; it’s much easier to call off a wedding than to go through a divorce,” Yarusso says.
#20
They divorced like two years later.