An old English proverb says that all's fair in love and war. The second part of this proverb has been used too often in world history, so that the first part is almost lost - and in fact, it often causes a lot of family problems.
You probably know how it happens - when a person wants something so much which they consider good for a loved one that sometimes they do not even ask the second person's own opinion. The very wording: "I just want the best for you!" actually causes a lot of trouble, derailing a number of families.
We hope that the family of the author of the original AITA Reddit post will somehow do well after the story that the woman told, while gaining 19.1K upvotes and 4.3K different comments. However, let's not get ahead of ourselves.
More info: Reddit
The original poster works as a nurse and is really keen on her work
Image credits: Tony Alter (not the actual image)
So, the Original Poster works as a nurse and has a very busy schedule, especially in the last few years, which is not surprising - in recent years, the vast majority of the world's medical industry have been working in a completely emergency mode. However, the OP seems to be quite satisfied with her work.
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
The OP's husband likes to spend his spare time with his relatives at their ranch
At the same time, her husband is a different type of person. He does an office job and spends all his free time with his family. And not only with his own wife, but also with numerous relatives. The OP's husband's family lives on a ranch far enough away from them that getting there is quite a hassle.
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
In general, despite the fact that the husband constantly invites the OP to all sorts of family events with his relatives, by hook or by crook, she sometimes tries to avoid visiting. True, as the woman admits, she always tries to attend really big and important meetings.
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
The OP's husband almost begged her to join him at his family's BBQ party but she had her work shift to do
Last week, the OP's husband's in-laws were having a big BBQ party and of course, invited the couple. The husband really wanted her to go with him - after all, all his brothers usually came with their wives and often made fun of him that he was alone again. The problem turned out to be that on the day of the party, the OP had a work shift at the hospital.
Image credits: Don Graham(not the actual image)
For a long time, the husband persuaded the OP to somehow skip the shift, swap with someone, or somehow still come to the party. He even called all her friends from work himself, literally begging them to cover her shift. However, the only thing he managed to achieve in the end was the wife's irritation. After all, the man resigned himself to the fact that he would again have to go alone...
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
The husband tricked the OP into going to the party instead of driving her to the hospital
No matter how! On the morning of the party, the OP suddenly discovered that the tires on her car were out of air. The husband offered to take her to work, and the wife, of course, agreed. Imagine her surprise when, instead of the hospital, the man drove her directly to the ranch, saying that he tricked her into going to the party, and now she would have to put up with it and skip work that day.
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
After a while, they reached the ranch. The OP glanced at her watch and made sure that if she found a way to get to work right now, she would still be in time for her shift. When the husband walked away, she saw his keychain, grabbed it and rushed to the backyard, where the cars were parked.
Image credits: u/Balcony-Angle5676
The OP took her husband's car and drove to her work hoping she'd get there in time
The father-in-law saw her driving away and, of course, immediately told his son. As a result, the husband called her so many times on the way to work that the woman simply turned off the phone. She was on time, but when the shift ended and she turned on the phone again, she saw a huge number of angry messages from her husband.
Image credits: Macro Verch Professional Photographer (not the actual image)
When the OP turned her phone on, she saw a number of wrathful messages from her husband
She answered one of the calls, and he fell upon her with reproaches and accusations of manipulation. He said that she allegedly betrayed him and made him look stupid in front of his entire family. Then the man calmed down a bit and said that he always knew that work was more important for her than her own family, and that now he could never trust her.
Since then, the OP and her husband have been on terrible terms, and she hasn't communicated with her in-laws at all since that ill-fated party. The woman is upset that, on the one hand, she unwittingly spoiled her marriage, but on the other hand, she was afraid that if she missed the work shift, she would simply lose her job.
Commenters backed the OP and said that her relationship with her hubby just cannot be healthy
However, people in the comments, on the contrary, massively supported the OP. It is strange to read that a man who lied to his wife literally in the face, later himself accuses her of manipulation. And what's more, it turns out that he puts his leisure time above her career. Commenters believe that a woman should not only not apologize in any case, but simply leave such an unworthy person.
Summarizing the original post, people note that the husband almost framed the woman with her job, gaslighted her, deceived and actually kidnapped her. According to most, this is a weighty reason to leave him. Most likely, commenters believe, the man has some kind of psychological problems - but in any case, this relationship cannot be healthy.
We are pretty sure that such twisted experiences have not happened to you, but if there was something similar, we will be grateful if you share it in the comments. And, as always, we welcome your views on this very narrative.