The one thing I learned in sociology class is that it’s fun to break social norms*. They’re not laws in the traditional sense, so you can’t go to jail for it. But be ready to risk that non-zero chance of suffering a blunt force trauma from a rando who doesn’t understand the difference.
Yep, cultural and social norms have a way of keeping order in a society in ways that don’t involve law enforcement—rather using the ol' stink eye, public shaming and similar tactics. Today’s topic deals with this particular thing, pointing out social norms specific to the US that non-USians might not be aware of.
* For the record, that’s not the only thing I learned in sociology. But it sure as heck stuck with me all these years.
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#21
TCFNationalBank said:
Caste-based discrimination is a no-no when working with American clients.
Caste-based discrimination is a no-no when working with American clients.
[deleted] replied:
Absolutely, this is especially true in retail. Clients from other countries cannot discriminate on any employee because of their race or ethnicity. I used to work at a very large retail store where the employees were VERY diverse and the amount of discrimination was appalling.
Absolutely, this is especially true in retail. Clients from other countries cannot discriminate on any employee because of their race or ethnicity. I used to work at a very large retail store where the employees were VERY diverse and the amount of discrimination was appalling.
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41points
#22
New_Stats said:
Don't smell bad. It's only acceptable for people to smell bad if they work outside and get sweaty, and then it's only acceptable for them to go into certain places, such as a convenience store, grocery store or fast food joint to get lunch.
Don't smell bad. It's only acceptable for people to smell bad if they work outside and get sweaty, and then it's only acceptable for them to go into certain places, such as a convenience store, grocery store or fast food joint to get lunch.
Other than that you better be clean and not smell like BO
hope_world94 replied:
I'll also overlook the stench if it's somewhere like a Lowe's or Home Depot. I just assume you had to stop mid project and get something to continue.
I'll also overlook the stench if it's somewhere like a Lowe's or Home Depot. I just assume you had to stop mid project and get something to continue.
Positive-Source8205 replied:
I judge a project by how many emergency runs I had to make to Home Depot.
I judge a project by how many emergency runs I had to make to Home Depot.
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41points
#23
Southern_Blue said:
Don't stare into the 'gap' in the bathroom stalls. You can give a brief glance of about a second to check if someone is in there, but then look away quickly and go about your own business.
Don't stare into the 'gap' in the bathroom stalls. You can give a brief glance of about a second to check if someone is in there, but then look away quickly and go about your own business.
I don't care for the gaps either, but we've instinctively learned to live with them.
Crunchy__Frog replied:
Nope. Even a one second glance is a second too long. Check underneath for feet.
Nope. Even a one second glance is a second too long. Check underneath for feet.
Seguefare replied:
Just quickly slide your eyes over the gap to check for a vaguely human shape indicating the stall is occupied. There's no reason to ever look directly through the gap.
Just quickly slide your eyes over the gap to check for a vaguely human shape indicating the stall is occupied. There's no reason to ever look directly through the gap.
Nicechick321 replied:
Why in the hell that gap exists??
Why in the hell that gap exists??
Hello_Hangnail replied:
Americans don't even know this one.
Americans don't even know this one.
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41points
#24
voleclock said:
Our personal space bubbles are pretty big and we like them that way.
Our personal space bubbles are pretty big and we like them that way.
Also probably having a sense of when the small talk is meant as a polite and succinct formality vs when the small talk indicates the person is willing to talk more with you.
JKmusclebunny replied:
“Hi, how are you?
“Hi, how are you?
“Good! And you?
“Good!”
A full conversation
BellumFrancorum replied:
Five star Uber ride.
Five star Uber ride.
35points
#25
La_croix_addict said:
“See you later” does not mean that you will see them later.
“See you later” does not mean that you will see them later.
Positive-Source8205 replied:
Me: See you later.
Narrator: But he did not see them later.
Me: See you later.
Narrator: But he did not see them later.
pizza_for_nunchucks replied:
You have to say "See you later alligator" to make it official that you will in fact see them again later
You have to say "See you later alligator" to make it official that you will in fact see them again later
catawampus_doohickey replied:
But only if they reply, "after a while crocodile"
But only if they reply, "after a while crocodile"
marypants1977 replied:
Not too soon baboon.
Not too soon baboon.
deruch replied:
Lol. That made me laugh, giraffe.
Lol. That made me laugh, giraffe.
Cherryboy52 replied:
Know why? Cow pie!
Know why? Cow pie!
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35points
#26
BooksAndStarsLover said:
Don't touch us if you dont know us.
Don't touch us if you dont know us.
Handshakes are allowed if the situation calls for it but you'll freak out people if you just go up and touch them.
Lucia37 replied:
And for the love of God, don't hug anyone unless you are 150% sure they are ok with it.
And for the love of God, don't hug anyone unless you are 150% sure they are ok with it.
Thadlust replied:
Does not apply in the south.
Does not apply in the south.
35points
#27
A common small talk practice is to mention something, like a movie, book, place, and give an opinion on it and then people state their preference (what they like). You do not have to agree with that preference, but can put forth something else you like.
This drove a Finnish work exchange students nuts when I was working with him. He characterized our "get along in work " talk as randomly stating our preferences to the group (it was a job where we could talk to each other) and gave an example of a conversation similar to below -
Person A - I like "a movie"
Person B - I thought it was okay
Person C - I like "different movie"
Person A - that was good too, I liked X about it
Person B - I like "new thing"
Person D - "New thing" is ok, but I like "something" so I use "other random thing"
He said this repeated so he had to listen to coworkers state what they "like" or "don't like" or "like better" for the rest of the day, and then we bothered him during the conversation to ask him if he liked whatever random thing someone brought up.
He thought that all we did to talk at work was state our opinions until he realized it was a socializing mechanism where people were trying to get to know other people through this "small talk."
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35points
#28
BellumFrancorum said:
We measure distance in time. You should fully expect to be told how long it will take you to get someplace instead of how far away it is.
We measure distance in time. You should fully expect to be told how long it will take you to get someplace instead of how far away it is.
roadgeek999 replied:
It’s generally assumed that the time given is the amount of time it would take to get there in a car, unless the person specifies otherwise.
It’s generally assumed that the time given is the amount of time it would take to get there in a car, unless the person specifies otherwise.
420BongHitsForJesus replied:
Horse drawn carriage is the preferred method of transportation actually.
Horse drawn carriage is the preferred method of transportation actually.
PineappleSlices replied:
Also worth noting that this isn't true if you're in a city with a robust public transit system.
Also worth noting that this isn't true if you're in a city with a robust public transit system.
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33points
#29
jollyjam1 said:
Depending on where you visit, please don't walk slow or stand in the middle of the sidewalk.
Depending on where you visit, please don't walk slow or stand in the middle of the sidewalk.
HereComesTheVroom replied:
@ the Brazilians on vacation in Orlando
@ the Brazilians on vacation in Orlando
I know they aren’t the only ones, but I always saw them the most growing up and it is so goddamn annoying for a group of a dozen people to just stop in the middle of a walkway.
Luxowell replied:
Used to have a friend who worked for Disney who said the groups of Brazilian tourists were always the worst behaved groups. At first she was like "I can't believe you're saying that! It's wrong to judge groups of people!" A week later, she was like "OK! You're right!"
Used to have a friend who worked for Disney who said the groups of Brazilian tourists were always the worst behaved groups. At first she was like "I can't believe you're saying that! It's wrong to judge groups of people!" A week later, she was like "OK! You're right!"
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30points
#30
LuvliLeah13 said:
Staring. My husband is from a culture where they stare at people, even after you look at them. He still does it occasionally and I have to remind him that it makes Americans terribly uncomfortable. It’s incredibly creepy and rude.
Staring. My husband is from a culture where they stare at people, even after you look at them. He still does it occasionally and I have to remind him that it makes Americans terribly uncomfortable. It’s incredibly creepy and rude.
trynot2screwitup replied:
I’ve never experienced this. What’s prompting the staring? Curiosity? Are they silently connecting when they stare or just not paying attention to where their eyes are?
I’ve never experienced this. What’s prompting the staring? Curiosity? Are they silently connecting when they stare or just not paying attention to where their eyes are?
LuvliLeah13 replied:
If you look at them you will make direct eye contact. It’s not a glance. It feels like being watched. It’s just cultural. Everyone stares and they grow up that way so it’s completely normal in that culture. Very jarring here.
If you look at them you will make direct eye contact. It’s not a glance. It feels like being watched. It’s just cultural. Everyone stares and they grow up that way so it’s completely normal in that culture. Very jarring here.
FiveDaysLate replied:
It was like this in Madrid when I lived there. On the metro people just stare at you very uncomfortably.
It was like this in Madrid when I lived there. On the metro people just stare at you very uncomfortably.
baalroo replied:
What happens when you stare directly back at someone staring at you there? Do they just not react at all, like the concept of "staring" is just completely meaningless and lost on them?
What happens when you stare directly back at someone staring at you there? Do they just not react at all, like the concept of "staring" is just completely meaningless and lost on them?
FiveDaysLate replied:
Yeah they just keep looking at you full eye contact and all.
Yeah they just keep looking at you full eye contact and all.
SaintJuneau replied:
From my experience in the Madrid metro, I'd say 75% keep staring and the other 25% might initially break the stare but then go right back to ogling.
From my experience in the Madrid metro, I'd say 75% keep staring and the other 25% might initially break the stare but then go right back to ogling.
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29points
