35 Law Officers Share The Most Disturbing Things They’ve Seen On Duty (Trigger Warning)

As I mentioned elsewhere my dad was a copper in the UK in the eighties.

A friend of my Dads (lets call him John) is sent out to investigate some suspicious activity in the Oxford area where he finds a house with a ladder against it, leading up to an ajar bedroom window.

Clearly a bit suspicious, but he can't see a van or any activity. He decides he had better investigate further.

So he proceeds to climb the ladder, remarking to himself how old and rickety it is.

As he reaches the top he briefly glimpses through the window a bedroom, with a cat sitting on the bed giving him a quizzical look.

I say 'briefly glimpses' because a second later there is a loud 'CRACK' as the rung he is standing on snaps cleanly through the middle. John plummets rapidly, each rung snapping cleanly as he hits them, like something out of a Looney Tunes cartoon. The sides of his hands gather a million splinters as they run down the sides of the ladder.

He hits the floor on his back and rolls away groaning, clutching his hands which are now 20% wood.

As he is laying there a car pulls up and a guy comes running over.

"What are you doing lying in my Garden mate? Are you alright?"

John slowly gets to his feet.

"I was checking your house, because there was a ladder going up to a window and someone reported it as suspicious!" John groaned.

"Oh no mate, that's just so my cat can get in, I haven't got a cat flap you see!" says the guy cheerfully.

"Are you not worried about getting burgled?" John whimpered.

"Nah" says the guy, "That's why I sawed half-way through each rung".

Not my story, but a good friend of mine was the youngest recruit to pass police training etc. in the area for a long time. At 19, he was fresh onto the service. I went for a pint with him a week later and you could tell he'd 'seen things' so I asked him what it was like.

Within three days he'd been called to a house of an elderly man who hadn't been seen in a few days. They found the man hunched over in the cupboard under the stairs with his hoover in his hand, they reckon he bumped his head whilst about to do some housekeeping and died whilst unconscious. The body had been there a few days and stank, the head had also swollen up.

As for unexplainable weird s**t, he told me about this one where they were called to a domestic. They got to the house and opened the door, instantly a whole load of sewer rats (not pet rats) flooded out, and there was no one home. The lights were on, the TV was on (quiet), and the loud voices they heard arguing were just gone. The only life there were the rats that ran out of the house. They searched the house, every nook and cranny, and found no one. He and his partner for the evening stayed around a while and waited to see if anyone came home, but after a few hours no one came, the neighbours couldn't even explain it. So they left. A few minutes later they got called to the same address again by a different person stating there's a pretty heated domestic going on. This time they brought the dog squad to find people, but again, the house was deserted. He said the freakiest thing was that the toilet had blatantly just been flushed when they got there as the cistern was filling, and the kettle was now boiling. The dogs found nothing as well. To this day he doesn't know what the f**k went on.

This one time I went out on a call of a suspicious person at a house near where I was at. When I get there the guy tells me that someone knocked on his door and when he went to see who it was there was a woman standing in his driveway with some sort of child-sized doll with horns and it looked like all bloody and cut up. So he asked the woman, who was looking away from him, what she wanted. She turned around and told him "It needs food" then started screaming at the top of her lungs and ran at him, so like a normal human being he slammed the door in her face and called the cops. I get there and there are well-defined claw marks on his door, there's also a good bit of blood, I supposed from her fingers. So I call it out and start the search on foot, I also had 2 or 3 units driving around the area to see if they can't find this chick.

So I'm about a block away and we get another call that the woman is back at the guys house, but in the back yard. So I run about a block back to the guys house and bust in his back yard. The lights are out so I have my flashlight out and I'm looking around. I see the chick huddled in the corner next to a evil-looking doll thing and I ask her if she's ok. She doesn't say anything. About this time one of my mobile units came back to the house and parked his unit where the headlights were shining on her so we could see how scary this chick looked. she had long nappy black hair, her cloths were rags, she had no shoes, clearly homeless, and she kept whispering things to the doll.

So my buddy and I approached and tried talking to her and she just kept whispering to the doll, couldn't understand what the h**l she was saying so we decided to drag her out of there. The second we put hands on this chick she went berserk. Punching, kicking, slapping, all kinds of stuff. So we're fighting with her trying to get her on the ground and she's not going down, this chick was strong as h**l. Well in the fight she somehow got away from us and was sitting in a crouched position with her head tilted to the side and making the creepiest growl/snarling sound I've ever heard. Then she screams at the top of her lungs and charged at us. So, my buddy straight-jabbed her in the face and knocked her clean out. We cuffed her and hauled her off to the hospital where she tested positive for PCP and various opiates. She was charged with battery of a peace officer, resisting arrest, and trespassing.

Later she was institutionalized for some sort of mental disorder, not sure quite what it was my department didn't have anything more to do with her after her booking into the jail.

My Mum's story not mine.

One time when she was in her mid-twenties she was policing in Bristol at night. She and her partner (who she already knew was a t**t) were driving around on patrol, when they drive past some road works, which consisted of a trench in the road so the road maintainance guys could get to the pipe.

As they drive past they see a group of stereotypical thugs also in their mid-twenties drunk and throwing road signs and traffic cones into the trench. So my mum's partner pulls over and say to my mum "go over and tell them to stop". There are about 6 or 7 of these guys so my Mum asks if he's going to go with here as he is a larger man in his mid 40's and a hell of a lot more intimidating than a petit woman in her twenties. He replies that it only takes one person to do it and he wants to stay in the warm car. So being fairly new (she wouldn't take that s**t now) she does what the more experienced officer says. So she gets out and walks over to the men, offers them a f*g (she doesn't smoke, but always carried a packet and a lighter for occasions like this) and asks them to stop throwing signs into the trench, cause it's criminal damage. Apparently one of them looked over to the car saw my mum's partner and says "Why doesn't he come and talk to us", to which my mum replied that he didn't want to leave the warm car.

Apparently the man then gathered his friends in some sort of huddle for a word and then they started jumping in the trench and taking out the road signs and traffic cones out and putting them back where they took them. My mum thanked them, to which they replied it was no problem for such a nice lady like her offered her a can of Stella, to which she declined and told her it was dangerous in Bristol at night and that the d**k of partner should have come with her, as anything that could of happened (bare in mind police in England don't carry guns). They then walked away into the night making the w****r sign and shouting a***e at the policeman sitting in his car that sent the new young female police officer to deal with a gang of drunken yobs.

TL:DR If you don't act like a d**********e people are more likely to help you out.

My dad's a dog-handler in the police and one New Year's Day they got a call saying "A guy's phoned in saying he has a koala in a tree in his back garden". We live in Northern Ireland... Koalas are not indigenous. Anyhow, my dad goes along with the dogs, figuring that the man was still drunk/high from a New Year's Eve party. My dad and his work partner arrived at the place and there was this guy who seemed totally sober and normal who led them to the back garden, where there was a big tree in which, sure enough, there's a creature sitting. Somehow they managed to get it in on of the dog cages from the police van (they're kitted out for about four dogs, and there were only two there at the time, so there were spare cages). Turns out it was actually a red panda who had escaped from the zoo and was just chilling around different gardens in the suburbs.

Probably not the weirdest thing he's seen but definitely the most unexpected. He also had to go out on a search through a forest by a big river in the dark after a guy who may or may not have been in possession of a machete. He said that was one of the scariest things that he had to do, because he had no idea whether he was about to get his head hacked off every time he passed a tree. The guy had already cut his friend's arm off then run away, so he was definitely capable of it. Turns out that he had ditched the machete in a field and then gone into a shop in the city covered in blood, and they called it in.

**Edit:** Just in case anyone's still coming and reading this - My dad had d***s and money search dogs for a while too (they could smell almost any quantity of any d**g they were trained to search for, as well as large sums of money like the ones d**g dealers/people traffickers could have). One of them got out of my dad's garden one day and, whilst usually they never went away from the house, he decided to take himself for a walk. He walked about a mile around the suburb that my dad lives in before coming to a main road. This particular dog had issues with buses, we think one might have crashed near him as a pup or something, but anyway this main road has big buses all the way along it and the dog gets scared. He managed to cross the road and ended up hiding in a bush on the other side of the road, where he was found by one of the other dog units who was out looking for him (when a policedog goes missing, it's a big deal, so my dad called it in as soon as he noticed and they had people out looking for him immediately as well as all the dog shelter people aware that if a big hulk of a german shepherd was found, he was trained to bite). Turns out the bush he hid in was right beside an ATM, so the story that went round the station wasn't that the dog had run away and got scared... it was that the dog had indicated on an ATM because of the cash inside. My dad preferred that version.

Not law enforcement, but similar job description. I was in Iraq on a route clearance team, meaning we drove around looking for bombs, hoping that we would deactivate them, or that they would blow up on us so that the regular units didn't get hit.

Well we were driving through an Iraqi police checkpoint, and the guard flagged us down to report that their counterparts down the road had found an IED, and if we could assist that would be fantastic. So we ventured on down, not expecting to find much (a lot of times we were stopped to "help" with military stuff but it turned out they just wanted MRE's or soda).

Well lo and behold, we come up to a group of Iraqi Police all standing on the edge of this canal embankment. It is a 15 foot drop down into the water. They have 40 foot electrical cable that they removed from the poles, and are tying to an Iraqi Policeman who is stripped naked down to his underwear.

Before we can intervene, this naked policeman scrambles down the side of the wall, into the canal, using the cable as support, and proceeds to get in the water. We edge closer, and the Iraqi Policeman apparently thought it would be a good idea to swim up to a propane IED that had fallen into the canal. We immediately got everyone back from the canal, and due to the language barrier, were unable to prevent him from tying this electrical cable onto the IED.

So we did what we thought was best, pulled up the IED, moved it to an isolated area, and blew it up. Luckily it did not go off on this guy.

But I'll never forget the day I came up to an almost naked policeman with electrical cable tied to his waist attempting to fish out an IED.

My grandpa was a big Irish cop who started his career in Minneapolis mid 1950's. He always has the best stories to tell, but the one unexplainable* one he tells me is that he got a call during Christmas eve to a house with 6 bodies in it. Being the first responder guy, he speeds his way there and gets to the house. He walks in, gun drawn only to find a family that looked like everybody had just had a long night and dozed off until he gets no response trying to wake them. He searches the rest of the house only to find a young teen girl in the bathtub with a single tear run down her cheek. Everybody seemed to have mysteriously d*e at once without any known cause and he never found out what it was.

He's got tons of stories, but apparently he's still afraid that all of the old gangsters would try to k**l him if he made his stories public.

*I keep on telling him that it was probably carbon monoxide poisoning, but he's old, crazy and just once wants a story like "they have in that x-files show".

UK here. Not a policeman but my brother is and I heard this story from him (though it was all over the local news as well...just without the gore). He wasnt the attending officer on the case but arrived on the scene as the bodys where being moved. (I acctually passed the scene on my way to work the day it happened as well though at that time the wreck was being hauled away)...So..just the fine details are 3rd party in effect.

It's a rather gruesome story so..read at your own risk.

A few years back in our local town, a couple of joyriders had stolen a car. The police gave chase but had to pull back due to the speeds involved. (They got clocked at 130 miles per hour through a residential area). The obvious happened and about 3 miles from where the police fell back, they managed to hit a wall or lampost or something and k**l themselves instantly.

Upon arriving at the scene, the attending officer discovered the drivers lower legs and feet had been pushed up due to the impact and his shin bone had gone through is jaw and up through his skull. Apparently it looked like he had a foot attached to his chin. The passanger however looked untouched and seemed to be unconsious...untill they tried to move him and discovered most of the bones in his body had been shattered. He sort of....folded backwards when the officer tried to pull him out for first aid. He then started to..compress, squish and implode into himself in the car seat.



If you think thats horrid you should hear the s*****e stories. Especially the ones of people hanging themselves then not being discovered for a while. More than once I've heard of someones head popping off when they try to get the body down. The m****r stories however...I dont even want to think about those. I may not allways think the police are right in some of their actions...but I certainly respect the fact that they have to witness and deal with some awfull s**t.

I was a customs officer for commercial goods, and I saw *alot* of s*x toys and bad p**n. The weirdest thing was when I spent a whole 2 days watching p**n to make sure it was legal. It was, but I would not have paid for any of it.

*Edit: On a lighter note, one of the more fun moments was when we were inspecting a crate of d**dos, and the d**dos were so huge they had a handle on them. My collegue and I took the opportunity to have a sausage fight. Those things hurt.

Former firefighter/medic... Was called to a mobile home by the health department to find next of kin information for two morbidly obese men who had died within days of each other (father/son). I had to wear a hazmat suit to go into the trailer because of the amount of bug infestation.

First thing that became clear was that they had been too large to fit down the hall to the restroom...for many years. You could see "wear marks" on the wall but the hall had been overgrown by cobwebs. They each had a recliner which had a hole in the seat - which led to a hole in the floor of the trailer - for the purpose of relieving themselves without getting up.

During the search some strange things were found. One bedroom, which hadn't been accessed for many years, contained a meticulously cataloged collection of baseball cards from every player in modern history - and autographed. But here is the real k****r: I opened the fridge for whatever reason and I found they had only 2 things in the house. Diet coke and sticks of butter. Tons of butter. The trash can was full of nothing but diet coke cans and wrappers from sticks of butter. I can only imagine they were eating butter and drinking diet coke. No wonder they both died.

I live in a fairly small town, my dad was a cop for 10 years or so, my aunt works in the ER going on 11 years now, & at the time of this story one of my best friend's brother-in-law was an EMT. They are all involved in this sick tale...

There was a call about a domestic dispute, then a 911 call from the same address from a woman who was just screaming & then cut-off. Of course they sent all available units immediately. After a few officers had showed up, they reported the situation back & the Chief decided no female officers or EMTs should be allowed near the scene. It turned out a Hispanic man was on d***s & had a f***k out on his girlfriend, accusing her of cheating. He beat the s**t out of her, broke several bones.

He decided their 3 month old baby wasn't his, picked up the infant by his feet & gutted him with an box-cutter. When the cops showed up he was beating on his girlfriend with a kitchen utensil while she huddled over the baby trying to shield him with her own body.

They got him subdued, rushed the baby to the ER, tended to the wife in the ambulance out front, & sewed up several cuts of the man in the kitchen. The EMT tending to him was my friend's brother-in-law. The man was still h**h but coming down & saying a lot of disgusting things about his girlfriend, the EMT slammed his head into the refrigerator, warning him to stop talking. A sergeant was in the room, saw this & gave the EMT an approving nod.

A few minutes later, the sergeant got fed up with the man's clearly unapologetic words & said "Do you hear that woman crying? She trusted you to take care of you, loved you enough to give you a son & look what you've done to them! She didn't cheat, you never let her leave the house so how could she? That little boy is your son, you could have been a father to him & raised him to be a great man, now you've taken that child's life. That woman, who loved you so much is out there weeping because she has just lost her son & her boyfriend, don't you care at all?!", the man then said that if that baby didn't want him to k**l it then it should've died before it was born & that the woman deserved it because she was a "dumb b***h, cheating or not" & the sergeant shot the guy in the foot.

My father witnessed all of this & later had to testify. My aunt said in the ER the baby was laying there & his intestines were literally laying next to him on the gurney, outside his body. Every single person who worked on that baby requested therapy afterward. The mom had some pretty bad internal bleeding but my aunt said the most disturbing thing was hearing her scream for her baby. She said in all her years in the ER she's never heard anyone scream like that.

The mom & the baby actually both lived but the baby has some serious brain damage because he didn't get enough oxygen to the brain because of a punctured lung.

The man is in prison, I know he got d**g charges, weapons charges (un-registered guns were found in the home as well as more d***s), domestic battery, attempted m****r & a few others I'm not sure of. I do know he has no possibility of parole & a long sentence but I'm not sure how long the sentence turned out to be.

The sergeant & EMT were both fired, that was the hearing my dad had to testify in (among other officers & EMTs).

This is by far the best story any of them ever told me. It totally rocked the whole town, too.

My old man was a cop for 35 years. Over the years, I've heard a lot of funny stories. Not many W*F stories but I think he preferred to keep it light and fun.

A guy was threatening to jump off a tall apartment complex. My father was on the ground, blocking off traffic. Eventually, the guy jumped to his d***h. Commotion ensued and someone asked over the radio what happened. My father response was "He jumped. And what really s***s is the Russian judge only gave him a 9.5". A lot of people with scanners reported him. Result: Verbal Tongue Lashing

A woman pulled over to the side of the road, where he was working a detail. She asked him how she can get to Harvard. His response, "Study REAL hard!" He then laughed at his own joke (the norm) and walked away. She reported him. Result: Chief told him to "cut the s**t"

He got called to a report of two thieves stealing oriental rugs from a condo complex. He spotted two dudes running with the rug rolled up and on each of their shoulders. I guess they ended up in a wooded area and he was out of breath. He yelled, "Please just f*****g stop. I'm going to have a heart attack!" The two guys stopped and quickly turned around towards him. He reached for his weapon and, wouldn't you know, it wasn't there. He came up with a handful of air. The two guys laughed and just ran off with no pursuit from the keystone cop.

Result: Spent 4 hours searching the woods for his gun. Finally found it suspended on a branch. This was before the days of safety holsters.

Nearly all of my family lives in a city of 500,000 in the Midwest. 7 of my family members are either firemen, EMTs, or police.


My dad was once called to an accident before people riding in the bed of trucks was illegal. A family was on their way back from swimming in a local river; mom and dad in the front of an S10 with three kids in the back.

The dad swerved to miss some animal and slammed on his breaks. Two children were thrown on the road and got a ton of skin peeled off. The third was pinned between the truck and a tree.

Dad was a firemen without his EMT at the time. He drove one of the firemen car things so he got there first. He had to stand and watch the kids writhe in agony while waiting for the ambulance.

He applied for EMT courses the next week.

Guy came into the jail on a DUI. Turned out it was like his 5th, so he wasn't getting out anytime soon. He was ok for a few days and then started getting DTs bad. After a few days of mental health and medical saying keep an eye on him, it's just DTs he started going really nuts. He only spoke in gibberish and not to real people. He would p**s, vomit and s**t everywhere, but the toilet. He refused to wear clothes and would m*****bate incessantly.

Despite our concerns that he may have serious mental issues and repeatedly trying to get him admitted to the state hospital, we kept hearing the same response. Keep an eye on him, it's just DTs, he'll get over it.

Finally my supervisor had enough and called this guys lawyer. She came down and we took her to the isolation cell. I opened the window on the door for her and she called out his name. Naked, covered in his own fluids and with a crazed look in his eye, he calmly picked up one of his t**ds and ate it like a Snickers bar before going back to m*****bating. His lawyer gasped in horror, turned to me and my supervisor and said, "I'll go talk to the judge right now". 2 hours later he was on a transport to the state mental hospital. I don't really understand the medical aspect, but apparently he was such an alcoholic that the withdrawal had done serious and permanent brain damage.

Two stories from a friend of mine that's a cop:

1) Dispatch get's a call from an older couple reporting there's a man standing in their backyard. It's later in the evening and obviously the older couple is freaked out a bit. Several officers show up including my friend and split into two groups heading around either side of the house. As they emerge in the backyard, guns drawn, they see the suspect and promptly order him to get on the f*****g ground, face first, hands behind his head. As they draw closer he's not responding and they realize he hasn't moved at all. Rewind 2 hours, the suspect had robbed a 7-11 or something like that down the road and taken off on foot. As he entered the neighborhood he tried to cut through this older couples backyard. When he went to hop the fence in the back he slipped and impaled himself on a fence post. He couldn't pull himself off it and his own body weight slowly drove him down the post. It had entered at his groin and went straight up the his shoulder. He was literally a human scarecrow.

2) I can't remember if it was neighbors or family members, but someone realized an older gentlemen wasn't following his normal routine and became a little worried for him. I think they checked his front door, which was locked, looked in the windows, called the phone, no sign of him. So after 3 or 4 days the police are called to check on him. My friend and another office arrive at his house and as the enter the backyard they discover the worst smell they had ever come upon. What had happened was the man took a dip in his hottub one night and promptly had a heart attack. His body decayed at a much faster rate in the hot water and turned into human soup.

Well this will probably get buried, but what the h**l. One of my teachers is a retired cop and has a bunch of stories. The most W*F one, was a call he got for a disturbance in a residential neighborhood. It was reported that someone had been throwing around frozen chickens.

He arrives on scene and sure enough, there are frozen chickens all over the lawn and surrounding area. Him and his partner check around the area but the chicken thrower is nowhere to be seen. Once they decide they're not going to find the guy, they start heading back to their cruiser when..*WHIF*..flying frozen chicken barely misses his head. He turns around and that's when he sees the suspect. Standing on the porch of one of the houses is a 300 pound woman, b**t naked, holding two frozen chickens. The woman screams incoherently while throwing the remaining birds and eventually runs into the house.

My teacher enters through the front door, while his partner goes around back to cut off any exits. He makes his way through the house clearing rooms, but the woman has disappeared. Just as he's passing by the bedroom, he gets tackled out of nowhere. The naked, linebacker sized woman throws him to the bed and he's trapped beneath her rolls. The woman yells "F**K ME! F**K ME!" while riding him like a bull. Now my teacher is fearing for his life. Not only is he being crushed by this walrus of a woman, but one of his arms is trapped and she can reach for his firearm at any moment.

Just then, his partner enters the room and freezes. He cannot believe what he's seeing. "GET HER THE F**K OFF OF ME!" My teacher screams. Holding back the laugher, his partner grabs the woman and they eventually are able to place her under arrest.

**TL;DR My retired cop teacher gets humped by an obese, naked, frozen chicken wielding woman and lives to tell the tale**.

That shot an emu statement made me think of something when I was in Iraq.
Backstory there was an abandoned private zoo near our headquarters. Somebody had previously released all the animals.
This was over the radio while I was on watch.

BlahBlah:HQ this is BlahBlah

BlahBlah:There is a bear approaching my position.

HQ:BlahBlah repeat last statement?

BlahBlah:(more emphatically)There is a BEAR approaching my position.

Load Bang heard from a distance

BlahBlah:Nevermind, the bear's d**d

Apparently it was a polar bear that had been released and was wandering around and came upon one of our soldiers as he was on perimeter duty. He let it come within 50 yards or somewhat, and then said f**k it, and shot it with his vehicle mounted .50 cal.

That was a W*F moment, a polar bear attack in Iraq.

My old roommate's dad was a former Naval Officer and then FBI agent. 20 years in the navy and 12-15 years or so in the FBI.

One of his strangest stories was from his FBI days. I'll paraphrase it below.

A kidnapping case, this girl disappeared from her grandparents RV sometime between like 5pm and midnight. They were up front, next thing they know, she's gone. She was supposed to be sleeping in the back. One stop at a rest stop, then they were in stop-and-go traffic so they figure she must have popped out the door at some point. This is near the California / Nevada border. So we meet them, talk to them, this is within about a day or so and the girl's still missing, no sign of her. She was 15.

Local PD theory is she ran off because she's 15 and wants to get away from her lame grandparents for the summer. But there's a busted window (glass inside the vehicle) so we're treating it like a possible kidnapped person.

After a few hours, there's a couple different theories on the case. One is that she ran off, another that she got snatched. Nobody's seen the girl in almost two days now, and disappearing in the desert for a young girl is tough.

Next thing you know, we get a phone call - naked girl, lost and confused, picked up by some trucker on a two-lane road out there called Nipton. Runs into I-15 between Barstow and Vegas somewhere. Right near the border. Matches our description. Me and three other guys head out there to meet with the Sheriff who's got her. Turns out she's our girl. She's fine. No r**e. No bruises. No exposure. Nothing. Completely healthy. Completely fine. Even cleaned like she took a shower. Won't tell us a d****d thing. Doesn't remember a d****d thing.

According to her, one minute she's in the RV, the next she's naked walking down the side of the road in 100 degree heat. We talked to her for two hours while her grandparents headed out to pick her up. We had our social services lady talk to her - nothing. I've seen people hiding things - she wasn't hiding anything. She honestly didn't remember.

Damndest thing. Anyway, girl was found, she was fine, so we turned it back over to Local PD to figure out what happened and determine if charges were pressed and all. I kept in touch with a guy I knew there because I was curious and we were in a fantasy football league. A few months later he tells me the parents sent the girl to a therapist to look for "repressed memories" to make sure she wasn't r***d or something. Therapist says she seems fine, but honestly has no recollection of her time at all, and doesn't think there's any point to delving much further since she has no symptoms and is largely more confused by the reaction than the event.

So to this day, we've got a busted RV window with glass on the inside, likely from a moving RV on a jampacked freeway, likely in broad or lightly fading sunlight, with zero witnesses. A 15 year old girl gets out, or is taken out, and is taken somewhere safe nearby for almost two days, and then is stripped naked without being touched s******y, cleaned up, and deposited on the side of a separate road a few miles away. She didn't have a d**g in her system that we could detect. She remembers nothing at all. Nobody knows what happened to her clothes or anything.

Been almost 20 years since this happened, and I can't figure out what the hell went on with that girl. Still bugs me at night that I have no way to explain it aside from "She lied the whole time", but I know liars, and I'd bet money she wasn't lying at all.

My buddy's a 911 dispatcher in Los Angeles. He said in his first few weeks on the job, some guy called and the conversation went like:

**Caller:** *Hi, I just walked outside to my apartment's parking lot and s**t fell on me and everything in the lot*

**Dispatcher:** *Okay, sir, are you speaking figuratively? What exactly fell?*

**Caller:** *I mean s**t, literally. It just fell on my and all of the cars. It came out of nowhere.*

My buddy immediately brought it up to his supervisor who couldn't believe it, and had never heard a story like that in her 20+ years of dispatching. After a bit of researching, they followed up with FAA to find that a plane in flight path of the apartment building was having issues with its toilets.

My uncle is a cop in Germany and he has some crazy stories to tell the most recent more funny one was about a Lady, mid 40 , blond, she came into the police station and told the officers that someone stole the window out of her car she was convinced she fell victim to professionals cause there were no signs of shattered glass or anything. So one of my uncles colleagues goes out with her to check out the car and supposed theft. Then he pushed the button and rolled the window back up. The woman was d**d serious.