If age is just a number, then a prison cell is just a room. When they say that hangovers get worse after your mid-twenties, they're not lying. Because, heck, they do, and a few bevvies can take a day to recover and two pills of Ibuprofen to get that clapping monkey with cymbals out of one's head.
Do you know what is even less fun? Turning 30. By 30, you're expected to have a house, two children and to have seen the Taj Mahal. Oh, and about 50 grand in your savings account. I know you've come here to read jokes about turning 30, but turning 30 is a joke in itself.
Okay, okay, it's not THAT bad. Well, perhaps your knees and back don't feel like they were when you were 18, but yakno, it's bearable. So whether you're looking for turning 30 jokes, funny birthday puns for a friend who's turning 30 soon, or just want to laugh at yourself, you've come to the right place.
Below, we've compiled a lengthy list of 30th birthday jokes, jokes about getting old(er), and just witty adult jokes. Take a look at the funny jokes we have gathered, and let us know if any made you crack a smile! And show off those pearly whites more often while you still have them *winking face*.
P.S. if you're looking for funny birthday wishes, we got you covered!
#1 Adulting Hits Different
"I’m 30, but I still feel like I’m 20 until I hang out with 20-year-olds. Then I’m like, no, never mind, I’m 30."
unknown
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#2 Time flies, but I’m stuck in the 90s
" When someone says ‘10 years ago,’ I think about the 90s, not the 2013."
unknown
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#3 Welcome to Adulthood, Apparently
"Welcome to 30! From now on, if you get pregnant, people will assume you did it on purpose."
unknown
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#4 Adulting Hack: More Cash, Same Chaos
"As long you don't have kids your 30's are like your 20s but with money."
unknown
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#5 That Moment Aging Strikes Back
One day she noticed a gray hair in her bangs. She turned to her husband, pointed to her forehead, and said, 'Have you seen this?' 'What? You mean the wrinkles?'”
unknown
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#6 Forever 18, Just More Confused
"Inside every 30-year-old is an 18-year-old asking, ‘What happened?’"
unknown
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#7 Adulting Level: Questionable
"Welcome to 30! The age when you should know better, but really don’t!"
unknown
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#8 Forever Young, Forever Silly
"You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime."
unknown
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#9 Adulting Level: Ibuprofen for Breakfast
"Welcome to your 30! Ibuprofen is an acceptable breakfast."
unknown
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#10 Glow-up or breakdown?
"Me in my 20s: Secretaly hates everyone.
Me in my 30s: Publicly hates everyone."
unknown
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#11 The Age Where I Just Don’t Care
"I finally reached the perfect age. Somewhere between 29 years and none of your business!"
unknown
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#12 Aging Like Fine Sarcasm
"I'm oficially 'You look good for your age' years old."
unknown
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#13 Shots fired, literally
"The chanting of 'Shots!' sounds more threatening than exciting."
unknown
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#14 Adulting Level: Actually Just Starting
"How can you say we are old after 30? We just became women! Like anyone took us seriously in our 20s…"
unknown
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#15 When Your Teen Closet Becomes Retro Gold
"The clothes you wore as a teenager are now vintage. Hope you rock that vintage style."
unknown
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You’re not alone, see which celebrities also crossed the big 3-0 recently in our milestone birthday recap.
#16 Dwight’s Age Truth Bomb
"Turning 30? Age is just a number!"
" False: Age is a word." – Dwight Schrute
Dwight Shrute
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#17 Welcome to the Sleep Debt Era
"Your 30s – where if you don’t get 8 hours of sleep one night you’ll pay for it for a week."
unknown
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#18 Well, That Trust Ship Sailed
"You’ll never be trusted by a teenager again. You’re officially too old to trust."
unknown
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#19 Late night binge, no regrets
"It's 8:30 p.m. and you want to start a movie this late?"
unknown
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#20 Aging Like Fine Procrastination
"Don’t worry about being 30. You’ll get over it within a decade."
unknown
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