To be liked back by people that you yourself like is a really nice feeling, indeed! However, most people have experienced not having things go exactly as they wish or had “planned”, and rejection by a romantic partner of one’s choice might be one such experience. While from the outside it might seem obvious that there are various factors in play, getting no for an answer might be hurtful to the point when it is tempting to put blame on the source of rejection. Namely, that very person who just recently was the source of one’s fascination. The content creator Cyzor addressed such a tendency by people to blame their rejection on them being “too nice” and women choosing poorly, and he encouraged people to look beyond this fallacy.
More info: Instagram
A man answered a comment online criticizing women for overlooking nice guys due to their "niceness"
Image credits: Cyzor
The man explained that treating another person nicely is basic, but does not make one entitled to them
Image credits: cyzorgg
"Who is going to tell them? I'll tell them. Women aren't looking for nice guys"
"Let me tell you the problem with 'Nice Guys'. First off, being nice isn't a flex. That's what you're supposed to be. Expecting women to want you because you're a nice guy, it's like expecting women to want you because you shower regularly. You shower regularly, right? At some point during your childhood, somebody told you that if you want a girl to like you, all you have to do is be nice to them. They lied. I'm sorry, that's not true."
"That is not enough. You need more than that. Do you understand? And this bitterness when a girl you like f***s someone that's not you? What's that about? Who did they f**k? Somebody with more than niceness, right? Somebody who was charismatic, maybe? Who looked good, who smelled good. Who was funny. Somebody more interesting than you, right? Yeah."
Image credits: Anete Lusina (not the actual photo)
"Let me break this down for you. If you're feeling bitterness, that means you feel like you deserve something and you didn't get it, right? You feel like you deserved her, right? Because you're so nice, yeah? No, stop being entitled, what's wrong with you. That's not how any of this works. Sometimes you'll put your best foot forward and someone still won't like you because they just don't like you. That's life. Being bitter about it is childish. Move on."
"Another thing about 'Nice Guys', your niceness is always conditional. Like you're nice, right up until the point where you realize that they're not going to sleep with you. And after that they are every name in the book. They're ugly, they're s***s, they're everything. As soon as you find out, they don't like you - they're everything. Your niceness is so fake. That's why women aren't looking for nice, there's no more."
Image credits: cyzorgg
"If your niceness is conditional, then it's just manipulation"
"And another thing? Y'all are only nice to people that you find attractive. Let her be someone you don't find attractive and see how not nice you would treat her. And the last thing is, hey, y'all get mad at women when they f**k somebody who y'all think is not a good guy. 'They say they want good dudes, but then always f**k the blah, blah.' Shut the f**k up. Let's say someone asked me what kind of food I like because they're ordering food for everybody. And I say 'I like a good steak.' And they say, 'Well, we got McDonald's, Taco Bell and Wendy's.' I'm going to pick McDonald's, Taco Bell or Wendy's."
"That doesn't mean I lied about the steak. Steak just wasn't available. Good steak is hard to come by. By the same token, if I say I don't really like McDonald's, but they brought in an extra burger and I haven't eaten - I might just eat the McDonald's. That doesn't change the fact that I want the steak. My point is this - spend less time trying to be a nice guy and spend more time trying to be a good man. Spend less time mad about who somebody else's with and more time becoming a more interesting person. Work on yourself. Okay?"
Image credits: Cyzor
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
This content creator was responding to a comment online criticizing women for not noticing the nice guys and secretly preferring men who are “not nice” or whom they only prefer due to physical qualities. The man explained that such an approach often works as an excuse for turning bitter and blaming women for a rejection, rather than turning inwards and either working on themselves or choosing a partner who chooses them.
According to the content creator, while being nice is what a person “is supposed to be”, this is often “not enough” to be liked back by a woman of one’s choice. The man even compared being nice to such basics as “taking a shower regularly”. Needless to say, according to Cyzor, presenting "niceness" as an argument of why a man is entitled to any woman he prefers is childish.
For this reason, he criticized men turning bitter after a woman of their choice, despite them thinking of themselves as nice, chooses someone who is possibly more interesting or simply is a better match for her. The content creator brought attention to the point that, by turning not nice after rejection, people only show their niceness to have been a form of manipulation that only holds as long as it can be useful for them.
The man’s video gathered 22.7k likes on Instagram in just 5 days and people were expressing support in the comments.
Image credits: Alina Vilchenko (not the actual photo)
People shared their takes on the situation
Image credits: Keira Burton (not the actual photo)
