“We Are Not Pretending”: 50 Things Women Want Men To Finally Understand

That they need each other. I wish they could get past the programming or the perception that speaking to and loving their friends is not "weak" or "gay" or in any way a bad thing.

Too many men want women to fix them by providing them with the type of friendships women have between themselves, with the bonus of s*x. That's not how it works.

You are capable of (and very much should be) leaning on each other. Not us.

YOU CAN DO IT!

That most of us don't actually like doing emotional labor all the time; we're just socialized for birth to provide that service for men.

Being independent doesn’t mean we don’t want love.

That just because you have the girl doesn't mean you can't lose her, no matter how much they love you. You start to get so comfortable that you stop trying and start to treat them like an option.

Once they start to change with you it's not because we found another guy, we just put as much effort as you do or treat you like you treat us. Then we slowly fall out of love and we just stop arguing , stop complain. If we bring stuff up it's not an attack towards you . If you get defensive and turn it around on her. Then she will stop coming to talk to you. By the time you realize it we have already checked out.

At sex:

it's not because we show or tell you that what you're doing is good, that it mean "go faster and harder". NO!!!!

It means keep going and change nothing.

Many men might not fully understand the pressure women feel to balance multiple roles in their lives, whether it's career, family, or social expectations. It can be overwhelming, and sometimes they just need support and understanding.

When i first met my now husband he didnt understand why women are scared of most men. it wasnt until i was harassed, stalked and humiliated by men that he completely understood, he apologized for never taking me seriously before.

it didnt take long for him to come to the realization, which honestly happened within the first few months of dating.but gross men being gross it happened a lot where we used to live, my husband has saved me many times, and ill always be thankful for him.

The vagina is a naturally moist place. When we say we’re dry, don’t imagine skin dry. Imagine your mouth. Normally it’s a wet place right? But when we say we’re wet, it’s noticeable. Like you smell something delicious and you’re salivating so much you have to swallow. THAT IS WET. Not normal mouth feel wet.

That we understand you better than you far understand us. Not only are women generally given a lot more social training than men, and raised under the expectation of being empathic caregivers, but the male experience isn't really an avoidable one.

I grew up reading books and watching movies with male protagonists about male issues, not because I sought them out but because that was just the books and movies there were. Meanwhile the majority of movies don't even pass the Bechdel test. Understanding women is optional, the female experience takes effort to find and learn about.

I see reddit threads titled things like "Men, what do you wish women understood?" and its full of things that pretty much every woman has known for years whether we wanted to or not. We know what you feel. We know why you feel it. And we're stuck over explaining for the nth time why we're nervous around strange men.

Saying things they don't mean because they think it's what we want to hear.

I don't care who responded badly in the past. Each person is a new page and they should not be held responsible for the transgressions of past partners. If you can't adequately separate the two, you should not be actively dating. Or, at the very least, have excellent communication skills and be able to talk through what is going on in your head.

It's exhausting getting the flip flop and whiplash of men who say one thing and then do the opposite a short time later.