No matter how much technology progresses and the innovations you see, your ability to connect with other people will never go out of style. (Well, unless AI becomes sentient and goes all Matrix on us, but let’s not be so pessimistic for a bit.) Empathy, good communication, authenticity, relatability, and active listening are all ‘soft’ skills that are incredibly helpful in life.
Not just in your career but also while you’re interacting with your family, friends, and complete strangers. After all, unless you live alone in the wilderness, you’ll constantly interact with people nearly every day of your life. But even if you’re not particularly emotionally intelligent right now, luckily, it’s something that you can develop.
Your emotional intelligence (also known as EI or EQ) is your ability to express and control your own emotions while also understanding, interpreting, and responding to the emotions of other people.
While your IQ is related to book smarts, your EQ revolves around your interactions with other human beings in the real world.
It’s natural to wonder how emotionally intelligent you are. While there are tests that you can take, there are general signs to be aware of, too. Verywell Mind explains that some of the main signs of emotional intelligence include things like:
- Identifying and describing what people feel;
- Being aware of personal strengths and weaknesses;
- Self-confidence, as well as self-acceptance;
- Letting go of mistakes, as well as accepting and embracing change;
- Being curious, especially about other people;
- Feeling empathy and concern for others;
- Accepting responsibility for your actions when you make mistakes;
- Managing your emotions when things get tough.
According to the Harvard Business School, emotional intelligence has become a “must-have skill” and it is the strongest predictor of performance at work.
“Employees with high emotional intelligence are more likely to stay calm under pressure, resolve conflict effectively, and respond to co-workers with empathy.”
Identifying a lack of emotional intelligence can be pretty tough. HBR notes that the main components of EQ include:
- Self-awareness;
- Self-management;
- Social awareness;
- Relationship management.
Meanwhile, some indicators that you or someone else at work might have low EQ include things like blaming others when things don’t go as planned, regular outbursts, and strained conversations.
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For some people, emotional intelligence is something that comes naturally to them. For others, it’s something that they take a while to develop, while others still need to be very intentional about practicing it.
Some of the main ways that you can raise your EQ include things like journaling, where you record your emotions and reflect on how they influenced your decisions and interactions. That way, you know what mistakes you made and what not to do in the future.
