Humans usually love and adore their little pet buddies. However, sometimes, we don’t fully realize just how much they actually mean to us.
One X user recently posted something that he learned in his years as a marriage and family therapist, which he felt should’ve been obvious all along. To us, our pets are often every bit as important as the rest of our family, and when it comes to grief, that is visible more than ever. Scroll down to read all of it!
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Sometimes, it takes grief to realize the immense importance that our pets really hold in our lives
Image credits: Tranmautritam (not the actual photo)
While observing his patients, the therapist realized that most people see their pets as actual full members of their family, and the grief when they lose them is equally as heavy
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
The man explained that our attachment to them provides us stability and security, and to some people who lack strong family or social bonds, can be life-changing
Image credits: Pixabay (not the actual photo)
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
But even though the grief over a lost pet is just as significant as over a lost close family member, our society doesn't usually offer the same kind of emotional and social empathy
Image credits: Peng Louis (not the actual photo)
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
The therapist summarized that it's essential to give yourself time to make your peace with the passing of your pet family member, no matter what others might say
In one of his series of posts on the X platform, Josh Weed, a therapist working with families and married couples, decided to share his newfound insights into human and pet connection, which he learned through observing grief.
He said that sometimes, the intensity and the effect of a lost pet affected his clients the same as the loss of their primary family members. This is because our pet buddies, in the sense of attachment, are actually our real family members.
Josh explained that they provide us with stability and security, and there are plenty of examples where pets can be absolutely life-changing for people working through difficult times in their lives.
According to the therapist, the grieving process that we go through after losing a pet is identical to that of losing a close human being. However, our society often doesn’t see it that way and expects us to drop a couple of tears and keep going.
In the end, Josh urged people to let themselves take time to grieve their pets because, after all, they’re an equal part of our family. He also shared pictures of his own four-pawed family member.
People in the comments were moved by these posts, and they, too, joined in, sharing pictures and stories of their beloved pet friends and talking about the effect left by the loss of some of them.
Image credits: The_Weed
Image credits: The_Weed
To get some additional insights on the subject, Bored Panda reached out to an animal behaviorist, Julie Bond, who was happy to lend us her expertise.
According to her, there are some excellent reasons why we and our pets form such strong bonds with each other. Many animals, especially cats and even more so dogs, have shared their lives and co-evolved with humans for a long time.
The expert explained that these relationships are symbiotic, benefiting both sides. Pets provide us with unconditional love, support, and attention while we give them shelter, food, love, and devotion. “Petting your dog or cat lowers your blood pressure, evens out your breathing, and causes the release of endorphins, thus making you feel better. And you know what? Your pet reaps those same benefits.”
The animal behaviorist said that while some may say childless people are replacing children with pets, that’s not really true, at least not according to the numbers. Yet, pets are treated as family because often, they do become actual family members to us.
No matter how close to us, other humans may, in some way, judge us. But our pets love us unconditionally, which is the foundation of every human-animal bond. “They ask nothing from you, quietly observing and waiting for you to truly see them for what they are... your only family members you get to choose for yourself!” said Julie, talking about how many of our daily problems can be made not so heavy by simply spending time with our pets.
When it comes to loss, the expert emphasized that we need to remember that grief over a lost family member is by no means silly or frivolous, and it makes no difference if they are human or not. Taking time to grieve is essential, and this process might differ for everyone.
Julie further added that getting a new pet straight away likely won’t fill the void. “Doing so too quickly does a disservice to that new animal who is trying to form a lasting bond with you,” explained the expert, pointing out that animals grieve too, so the loss of one pet at home will be felt by the others.
The animal behaviorist closes up by saying you shouldn’t shy away from help if needed. There are loss support hotlines like the National Pet Loss Hotline operating during the workdays, which can reached by calling 855-352-LOVE (5683), and for pets, you should always speak to your veterinarian, who will provide the needed resources.
Image credits: Ivan Babydov (not the actual photo)
To better understand how our pets experience grief and how we could better help them through it, VCA gives us some good examples and tips.
While the animals can’t just up and tell us how they feel, the article tells us that there are a few ways in which they might show it. Animals may become more vocal than usual and sleep more than they tend to do. They may also become more clingy or, quite contrary, show less interest in spending time together.
Grieving pets may also change their grooming and bathroom habits. They might also exhibit seeking behavior, often looking for their lost companion.
Fortunately, there are some things we can do to help them. Letting them investigate the deceased may provide some closure, and keeping up with the usual routines can bring a sense of security.
It’s also good to mindfully try something new or simply spend time together. Still, the hardest part is not to appear down in front of your pet as it may distress them, even if being comforted by them is so nice in any other situation. And in anything, as Julie Bond said, it’s always wise to seek out professional help.
In the end, it’s evident that with the many differences that humans and animals have, there are also many things, like grief, which we experience all the same. And the most important thing to remember is that all of it is equally real.
What did you think about this? Do you have any related stories about your pets you’d like to share? Let’s have a talk down in the comments!
Commenters were very moved and inspired to share stories about their own beloved furry and feathery family members
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